


The Rivers Between Us

by Ailendolin



Series: Moments of a Different Past [2]
Category: The Pacific (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major Character Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-04
Updated: 2017-11-11
Packaged: 2018-09-22 00:26:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 35
Words: 62,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9573800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ailendolin/pseuds/Ailendolin
Summary: Andy and Eddie's journey from Melbourne to Okinawa through various moments shared between them.Excerpt:He watches Jones leave, then, picking up his pack and a case that looks suspiciously like it contains a guitar. Andrew can’t help but be fascinated by this man with the impossible blue eyes, the unruly curls and a heart that seems to beat in a rhythm similar to Andrew’s. Jones will be good for the company, he knows, since he’s a veteran of Guadalcanal and can give the replacements valuable intel that cannot be found in any handbook. But, Andrew suspects, Jones will be good for him as well. He knows a kindred spirit when he sees one and that’s something he’s been missing since he was given command of K Company.





	1. Camp Balcombe - January 1943

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!  
> After almost two years since I've finished "The Sound of Voices Two" I can finally present you the sequel - or more accurately the sister story. I've gotten so much positive feedback for the original story (thanks again to everyone who commented or left kudos!) that I started writing the next installment immediately. Originally I wanted to cover the time after the war and wrote various chapters about that but then I changed my mind and started working on the beginning of their story which turned into this fanfiction. 
> 
> "The Rivers Between Us" will cover everything between Melbourne and Okinawa with five chapters per location. The chapters are alternately writting from Andy's and Eddie's POV. There will be 35 chapters in total and 18 so far are written. There will be a third installment to the series dealing with what happens after they come home. 
> 
> You do not necessarily have to read "The Sound of Voices Two" to understand this story although I will pick up on some things I mentioned there like Andy's letter to Eddie for example. 
> 
> Another important thing: I'm still not a native speaker since I'm from Germany so there are bound to be some grammar mistakes. Don't be shy pointing them out since it's the only way to learn =)
> 
> And finally, the title comes from the song of the same name which was performed in the show Nashville by Connie Britton and Charles Esten. 
> 
> I hope you will enjoy this story as much as the first one! Have fun!

**1\. Camp Balcombe, Melbourne - January 1943**

After Guadalcanal, Melbourne is heaven. Following months in the dense jungle of Guadalcanal it feels more than freeing being in a city like Melbourne, and for the first time in a long while Andrew Haldane is able to enjoy the sun and quiet without expecting an attack at any second. The first few days in Melbourne were difficult, not just for him but for a lot of men. Most had trouble letting their guards down and it took their minds some time to realize they were safe. Nightmares haunted every man after the exhaustion wore off and Andrew knows that it will probably take years to leave this war behind them, if that’s even possible. They have all seen and done things and lost good friends on Guadalcanal, and as much as he sometimes wants to forget everything that happened there, he knows he can’t and shouldn’t. New replacements are coming in and they need to know the lessons the veterans were taught on Guadalcanal so that they do not make the same mistakes and are a little bit more prepared for what’s to come than Andrew and his fellow Marines were.

Still, right now Andrew’s just glad he’s able to enjoy a sunny day without the fear of being shot at. He doesn’t mind the hours spent at shooting practice, hiking with the company or writing reports. Being busy suits him. Most of the men, he knows, use every opportunity they get to go into town, have a couple of drinks (and then a couple more), meet a girl and have a nice evening. Andrew prefers the quiet of the camp over the crowded streets of Melbourne. On the rare occasions that he does go into town he goes sightseeing instead of chasing after girls. It’s a lot more enriching as far as he is concerned.

He’s been made captain not too long ago. His actions on Guadalcanal earned him a commission and for a few weeks now he’s been the newly appointed captain of K/3/5. Having served with another unit on Guadalcanal, he’s still unfamiliar with most of his men, though he’s trying to rectify that with each passing day. Right now, he tries to memorize the names of the replacements that shipped in today. More and more are coming each day, and it’s difficult for him to keep track. Andrew tries his best, though, because he doesn’t like not knowing the people under his command. If he’s going to send those boys into combat and to their possible deaths one day in the not so distant future, he figures he owes it to them to know who they are. It’s the least he can do.

“Captain Haldane, sir?” a voice asks from his tent opening, interrupting his thoughts.

“Yes?” Andrew says, setting the files down and turning around.

A young man, though not as young as most of the replacements, salutes him. “First Lieutenant Edward A. Jones, sir, reporting for duty in K Company, 3rd Battalion, Fifth Marines.”

Andrew smiles. He’s been wondering when his newly minted lieutenant would finally make his way over to him. Standing up, he invites Jones inside his tent and offers him a hand. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you in person, Lieutenant Jones. Took you long enough to accept your battlefield commission.”

Jones looks confused and a little embarrassed. “Sir?”

Andrew gestures for him to sit. “I saw you on Guadalcanal,” he starts to explain, “that one night, when you single-handedly destroyed a machine gun nest to help out your company. I still have no idea how you managed that, by the way, but I was certainly impressed by what you did. The next day, I asked around and it seems you’re brave on a regular basis.”

Lowering his head, Jones says, modest, “Not brave, sir. I’m just doing my job.”

“Well, in my opinion and that of your superior officers what you did was beyond the call of duty, so I convinced your CO to put in a battlefield commission for you.”

“That was you, sir?” Jones asks. He looks surprised.

Andrew just grins at him. “There’s a reason you’re in K Company now, lieutenant. The moment they made me captain, I knew I wanted you in my outfit. You can imagine my surprise when I heard that you turned your commission down.”

Jones shrugs. “Didn’t feel right at the time,” he says.

“And does it now?” Andrew asks him, curious about this man in front of him who seems so different from the man he briefly saw that night on Guadalcanal.

When Jones looks up at him, his eyes are the clearest blue Andrew has ever seen. “Yes, sir,” Jones says softly in that ridiculous voice of his that Andrew finds himself already fond of. “I think K Company will be just the right place for me.”

“Glad to hear that,” Andrew says and he means it. “You’ll share a tent with Lieutenants Stanley and Ellington. It’s just across from here, so you can drop your gear there and enjoy the rest of the day. Most of the men have weekend passes and are already in Melbourne, so if you want to join them, you’re free to do so.”

Jones shakes his head. “I think I’ll rather stay in camp, sir.”

Andrew quirks an eyebrow at him. “Not one for drinking, gambling or flirting?”

“Just like you, I suppose, since you’re here as well, sir,” Jones challenges and Andrew grins. He feels like he won the lottery with this man.

“I’m more fond of touring the city and taking walks in the parks and gardens than spending all my money on drinks, yes,” Andrew admits.

Jones nods at that. “Maybe we can explore the city together sometime, then, sir,” he offers casually.

“I’ll be looking forward to that,” Andrew tells him with a smile.

He watches Jones leave, then, picking up his pack and a case that looks suspiciously like it contains a guitar. Andrew can’t help but be fascinated by this man with the impossible blue eyes, the unruly curls and a heart that seems to beat in a rhythm similar to Andrew’s. Jones will be good for the company, he knows, since he’s a veteran of Guadalcanal and can give the replacements valuable intel that cannot be found in any handbook. But, Andrew suspects, Jones will be good for him as well. He knows a kindred spirit when he sees one and that’s something he’s been missing since he was given command of K Company: someone who gets him.

Andrew finds himself excited at the prospect of going into town for the first time in weeks, if only because it grants him the opportunity to start to unravel the mystery that is Lieutenant Edward A. Jones.


	2. Melbourne - February 1943

**2\. Melbourne - February 1943**

Two weeks pass until they finally manage to go into town together on a sunny Saturday morning. With the arrival of all the replacements Andrew has had his hands full of organizing them into squads and platoons and making sure each squad contains at least one experienced veteran of Guadalcanal who can tell them all the important and valuable lessons they’ve learned in combat.

“So, how do you like your new platoon?” he asks Jones once they step off the train in Melbourne, trying to break the silence.

“They’re a fine bunch of men, sir,” Jones replies. “They still have a lot to learn, but they’re good boys, always eager to listen to war stories.”

He huffs out a laugh and Andrew can’t help but chuckle. “War stories will get you far with the replacements, that’s for sure.” Jones nods in agreement and, side by side, they walk down the street in the direction of Andrew’s favorite park.

“Tell me something about yourself,” Andrew inquires after they’ve crossed a busy street.

Jones shrugs. “Not much to tell, sir. I’ve been a sea-going Marine for a couple of years before the war, but then you already know that from my file.”

“But the file doesn’t tell me why you joined the Marines,” Andrew tells him with a grin.

Jones quirks a smile. “You question all your officers like that, Captain?”

Andrew winks at him. “Only the interesting ones.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment, then” Jones says. He takes a deep breath before he begins. “Ever since my dad’s accident, he’s been unable to work. Mom tries to do what she can, but it’s not easy with ten children. So, after I finished school, I started looking for a job that paid well and the Marines seemed like a good option at the time. Certainly better than the other job offers I came across. The only downside is that I don’t get to see my family often.”

There is a wistful note in his voice and Andrew almost feels bad for bringing it up. Still, what’s done is done, so he asks quietly, “Tell me about your family?”

Jones starts to smile earnestly then, obviously lost in happy memories as he remembers his loved ones. “Well, being the oldest of ten children meant I always had to help my mom with the younger ones. You know, calm them down when they cry, change diapers, take them to school or clean them up when they play outside in the dirt. Once I was old enough I did the odd job here and there to earn the family some extra money. Times were really tough after dad’s accident with mom being pregnant and unable to work for a couple of months. But somehow, we never went hungry. We didn’t have the best clothes or anything, but mom always put something to eat on the table. And, most importantly, we had each other and all in all, we were happy.”

“Sounds like a great family you have there,” Andrew notes, picturing the Jones family in his mind.

“I’m really lucky in that regard,” Jones says. “I love my brothers and sisters. My youngest sister, Jeannie, she’s three years old now. I’ve only seen her a couple of times whenever I was on leave, but she’s a ray of sunshine and everyone adores her. Mom always makes sure to write about her in her letters and sometimes even sends a photograph, though we can’t really afford that. She only does it because she knows how much I miss seeing Jeannie grow up.”

They take a turn and step into the park. “I have a sister, too,” Andrew finds himself saying. “She’s a couple of years younger than me. No other siblings, though. Just the two of us and we weren’t exactly close during childhood.” He sighs. “Having a big family that’s so close must be nice.”

“Yeah,” Jones agrees, “but it’s also tough, especially when someone’s birthday is coming up, or Christmas for example. My parents don’t really have the money for presents, so when I got older, I always found me some extra work to earn some money so the kids would get something for the holidays or their birthdays.”

“And what about you?” Andrew asks, though he thinks he already knows the answer.

Jones looks to the ground, obviously embarrassed. “I don’t need anything. Making them happy and seeing them smile is enough for me.”

And just like that it all makes sense to Andrew, why Jones doesn’t go drinking like the other guys, why he doesn’t throw his money around. His heart aches for this selfless man next to him. “Did they like the Christmas presents you got for them last year?” he asks softly.

Jones looks up at him in surprise, as if he can’t quite believe that Andrew has figured him out so fast. Then he says softly, “I sent mom some extra money to buy them presents before we shipped out to Guadalcanal, since I didn’t know when we’d be back or – well, if I would be coming back at all. But she assured me in her last letter that the kids loved what she got them.”

They spot a nice little patch of grass in the sunshine beneath a cherry tree and settle down.

“So,” Jones says, “I guess now you know why I prefer to spend my time outside of Melbourne, sir. What about you, if I may ask?”

Andrew shrugs, crossing his arms behind his head and lying down in the grass. “After all those months on Guadalcanal, I simply enjoy the quiet in camp. It’s nice not being surrounded by so many people, sometimes, and have a bit of privacy.”

Jones nods in understanding. “I know what you mean. I like being alone sometimes, too. Although, if I may say so, sir, being alone together with you sure makes for a nice change,” he adds with a cheeky grin.

Andrew grins back at him and makes a spur of the moment decision. “Why don’t you call me Andy when we’re off-duty? Or Andrew, if you’d prefer that? ‘Sir’ sounds way too formal for a day off as nice as this, don’t you think?”

He knows it’s spontaneous and Jones stares at him for a moment, clearly taken aback by that offer of friendship and familiarity so soon after their first meeting. For a moment Andrew thinks he’s going to decline, but then Jones offers him his hand and with a smile he says, “In that case, please call me Eddie.”

Andrew grins at him and shakes his hand. “Pleased to meet you, Eddie.”

“Likewise, Andrew,” Eddie says, and they laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, guys, thank you so much for your kudos and especially your comments! I can't quite believe that some of you were so excited to see this story published. I now feel really bad for making you wait so long for it. 
> 
> Anyway, here is the second chapter where Andy and Eddie get to know each other. I think I'm going to post a chapter every weekend. So far twenty are already written, so updates should come regularly. 
> 
> Enjoy this chapter and have a nice weekend, everyone!


	3. Camp Balcombe - April 1943

**3\. Camp Balcombe, Melbourne – April 1943**

Going into Melbourne and taking in the sights becomes a regular thing for Andrew and Eddie. Sometimes they go to the park and sit under the cherry tree where they spent their first day in the city together. Other times they stroll through the streets and look for souvenirs that Eddie’s siblings or Andy’s sister might enjoy. When Melbourne becomes too crowded for either of their comforts they go to one of the beaches instead, enjoying a day of walking barefoot in the sand and talking about everything and nothing. In moments like this life seems almost normal.

The days they spend at Camp Balcombe they work side by side, and it doesn’t take them long to get familiar with each other’s strengths and weaknesses. Almost without noticing they create a routine that works well for both of them, and sometimes not a single word is uttered in Andrew’s tent all afternoon while they concentrate on their tasks.

Andrew tries to create a similar relationship with his other lieutenants, but he soon realizes that for some reason it isn’t that easy and he comes to the conclusion that maybe Eddie is just special. He doesn’t know why but Eddie always seems to know which paper Andrew needs next, or when it is time for a break. Likewise, Andrew instinctively knows when the tent gets to stuffy for Eddie and sends him out to do some practical work which Eddie seems to relish.

It’s no wonder that one of the first things Andrew noticed about Eddie early on in their acquaintance is that he is good with his hands. Eddie can handle any kind of weapon with ease, is able to build things from scrap and even his handwriting looks a lot more neat than Andrew’s, as Eddie always loves to remind him of. But most importantly, as far as Andrew is concerned, Eddie can pluck notes from a guitar that sound downright amazing. Andrew hasn’t heard much yet because for some reason Eddie is shy about his guitar and only plucks at the strings when he thinks no one is listening, but Andrew’s heard enough to know that Eddie is not only good at what he does, he is brilliant at it. Now he only has to get Eddie to play something for him, a feat that is similar to defeating the Japanese: not impossible, but anything but easy.

“Will you play something for me tonight?” Andrew asks as they make their way through the camp towards target practice on a sunny afternoon. New replacements have come in today, and Andrew has spent all morning reading their files and learning their names, so it feels good to stretch his legs. Some of the names he’s read today sound downright exotic, like Romus for example. He wonders if the kid’s parents got their mythology wrong and somehow merged the names Romulus and Remus.

Next to him, Eddie shakes his head and chuckles in amusement. “Haven’t you grown tired of hearing me say no yet?”

Andrew shrugs. “I figure one day _you_ ’ll get tired of me asking and just say yes.”

“Fair enough,” Eddie says. “The answer’s still no, though. Sorry.”

Andrew stops him with a frustrated sigh and a hand on his arm. “Oh, come on, Eddie. Why not?”

He’s surprised and a little concerned when Eddie doesn’t meet his eyes. “Eddie?” he quietly asks.

“Look, my guitar is in pretty bad shape right now and I can’t get her tuned right and she really doesn’t sound good and I know you’d want me to sing, too, and that would sound even worse, and that’s why the answer is still no.” It all comes out in a rush, and there’s a light dusting of red on Eddie’s cheeks. “Sorry.”

“Really?” Andrew asks, trying to figure out if Eddie is messing with him. “Because if you ask me, your guitar sounds wonderful.”

At that, Eddie looks up at him with a disbelieving frown on his face. “That just shows that you’re absolutely tone deaf,” he mumbles.

Andrew laughs. “Why, thank you very much.”

Eddie shrugs. “That was not a compliment, you know?”

Andrew shakes his head, still amused. “So, what can we do to get your guitar up to your standards?”

“She needs new strings, I guess,” Eddie says reluctantly.

Knowing that Eddie saves every penny of his paycheck for his family and only buys something for himself when it is absolutely necessary, Andrew asks, “And let me guess, they’re expensive?”

“Yes,” Eddie sighs.

“Well, than I’m going to buy you those strings,” Andrew offers, thinking he’s found the solution to both their problems.

Eddie’s reaction to his offer, however, takes him by surprise. If looks could kill, Andrew would be dead right then and there and roasting in the Australian afternoon sun. “Let me get one thing clear, Andrew,” Eddie says in a voice that is both low and dangerous. “I don’t need your pity or your money. I can buy my own guitar strings just fine.”

With that, Eddie turns to walk away and Andrew can’t have that. Letting Eddie leave in anger over a misunderstanding is not an option, so he reaches for Eddie’s arm and holds him in place. “Hey, I didn’t mean to offend you,” he tries to apologize. At Eddie’s doubtful look he continues, “Really, Eddie! I’m not trying to step on your toes here. The way I see it, is this: I buy you the strings, I get you to hear you play. Seems like a good deal if you ask me. The company would benefit from this as well. Sing-a-longs boost morale and such. And if that’s not enough for you, I know your birthday’s coming up, so you can consider it a present.”

Eddie raises an eyebrow. “My birthday is still over a month away,” he points out.

Andrew shrugs and suggests with a smile, “It’s an early birthday present?”

Eddie stares at him for a moment, and it’s the first time in weeks that Andrew can’t really read him. It feels weird, but at the same time it shows him that no matter how good they are together, how well they seem to know each other, there is still a lot to learn. When Eddie finally offers him a reluctant smile, Andrew feels a weight lift off his chest.

“Alright,” Eddie finally agrees, albeit reluctantly.

“Really?” Andrew can’t help but ask, not wanting Eddie to feel pressured into agreeing to something he doesn’t like.

“Yes, really,” Eddie says. “I can’t deny that I miss playing my guitar. It’s just not the same when I cringe every time I strum a chord.” He pauses for a moment. “And I’m sorry I blew up in your face like this.”

Andrew beams at him and dismisses his apology with a wave of his hand. “Don’t worry about it. And it’s settled then, right? The next time we go into Melbourne, we buy you new strings and then you’ll play for me and the boys?”

“Sure,” Eddie nods. “But what I said about my voice still stands. It’s not the best.”

Andrew smiles reassuringly and pats Eddie’s arm. “I’m sure it will sound just fine.”

“We’ll see,” Eddie amends. “Now, come on, we’ve got new people waiting to be introduced to their squads and I’ve already heard about one of them being called Snafu and I have to admit I’m more than a little curious as to how he got that particular nickname.”

With a cheeky grin, Andrew says, “Then let’s go, oh minstrel of mine.”

“Shut up,” Eddie tells him and gives him an unamused look.

Andrew keeps grinning. “What, you don’t like that nickname?”

Eddie groans and shakes his head in exasperation. “I hate you.”

“No, you don’t!” Andrew laughs and pulls him along.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone to the weekly update! A quick thank you once again to everyone for leaving kudos and comments! 
> 
> In this chapter Andy and Eddie still get to know each other and sometimes mistakes are made. Also, it's the start of Andy's obsession with Eddie's musical skills ^^ Also, the minstrel bit is taken from Bill Sloan's book "Brotherhood of Heroes" where he describes Eddie to have "the soul of a wandering minstrel". I always liked that bit.
> 
> I want to wish everyone a very happy and relaxing weekend. I'm spending mine with a Pacific rewatch and am currently on episode six. We all know what this means in regards to Andy and Eddie ;-)


	4. Camp Balcombe - 22.08.1943

**4\. Melbourne - 22.08.1943**

Opening letters from home is always the highlight of Andrew’s day, but today the event is even more special. After all, you turn twenty-six only once in your life, and judging by the amount of letters and packages currently occupying his cot his family made sure to mobilize everyone at home to send him cards, letters, photographs and baked goods. He feels like a little boy again, opening parcel after parcel, and the grin on his face keeps growing with each one. It feels nice to be thought of like that, to still mean so much to the folks at home even though he hasn’t seen any of them in over a year.

Andrew can’t help but laugh when he opens a letter from his old football coach at Bowdoin. It’s full of anecdotes and funny stories, and Andrew finds a picture of his old team enclosed, taken in 1940. It brings back fond memories and puts a smile on his face, though he can’t help but wonder how many of those bright young faces are still alive.

He puts the letter aside and opens the one his sister sent him. Nancy is twenty-two now, and teaches children in an elementary school close to home. Andrew is so proud of her for making her dream come true. According to her letter, she adores each and every one of the kids, even the ones that sometimes throw tantrums equaling those Andrew threw as a child. He has to grin at that. Andrew will never admit it to his sister’s face, but he is very aware of the fact that she has always been the more disciplined one of the two of them and instead of being a good big brother, he more often than not had been a huge nuisance in her life. Still, he loves her fiercely, especially now that he’s older and can appreciate her more, and he knows she loves him just as much.

Thinking about his sister always makes him wonder about Eddie’s family. Growing up with ten siblings can’t have been easy, he figures, especially when you’re the oldest and have to take care of your younger brothers and sisters even though you’re still a child yourself. It always seems a bit unfair to Andrew that Eddie had to sacrifice a part of his childhood so that his siblings didn’t have to, but he knows that Eddie doesn’t see it this way. He adores all his brothers and sisters and would probably give his last shirt for them. Andrew’s family is close, too, but he gets the feeling that the Jones household is a whole different affair.

A knock on his tent pulls him out of his musings. He places the letter of his sister back onto the pile and calls for the person outside to enter.

“Andy, my old pal!”

To say that Andrew is surprised to see Everett Pope, his old friend from Bowdoin, enter his tent would be an understatement.

“Ev, what the hell are you doing here?” he asks with a laugh and steps closer to Everett who is holding his arms out for a hug.

“Well, I was in the neighborhood, remembered the date and thought I’d stop by and wish you a happy birthday,” Everett says, pulling him close. “So, happy birthday, Andy! How does it feel, being old?”

“Oh, stop it,” Andrew grins, taking his friend in. Everett looks older than Andrew remembers, but then combat does that to you, he supposes. He’s well-tanned, though, and his smile is still as boyish as it was back at Bowdoin. Andrew’s eyes fall on the collar of his uniform and the shiny silver bars that adorn it.

“Don’t tell me they made you a captain,” Andrew says, a note of playful disbelief in his voice. “Who in their right mind would put you in charge of a bunch of kids?”

Everett raises an amused eyebrow at him. “Probably the same idiot who gave you your bars,” he comments. “Which company is yours?”

“King Company, Third Battalion, Fifth Marines,” Andrew tells him, sounding every bit as proud as he feels. “Yours?”

“Charlie Company, First Battalion, First Marines,” Everett says. He shakes his head. “Look at us: two young men leading even younger men into battle. Who’d have thought?”

“Coach Walsh did, for once,” Andrew informs him. “My mom must have told him about the commission and apparently I’ve always had it in me to lead, according to his latest letter.”

Everett laughs. “You always were the golden boy, Andy.”

Andrew can’t deny that, so instead he says, “It’s not just me leading King, though. I’ve got a fine bunch of officers in my company. One of them is especially good at taking care of everything that gives me a headache. I’d be lost without him.”

“He sounds like a great guy,” Everett remarks.

“Oh, he is,” Andrew assures him with a proud grin. “And he can play the guitar like no one else.”

Everett chuckles at that. “What happened to the guy who didn’t have one single musical bone in his body?”

“Hey!” Andrew lightly punches his friend’s shoulder. “I resent that. Just because I sound like a toad when I sing and I’m a hopeless case when it comes to playing an instrument doesn’t mean that I can’t appreciate good music. And Eddie doesn’t just play good music, he plays _great_ music.”

Everett holds up his hands in defense. “Okay, alright, I rest my case. Hope the guy can fire a rifle just as well.”

Andrew nods with a smug grin. “Oh, he can, don’t worry.” He pauses for a moment, studying Everett’s face. “Now, where’s my birthday present? Don’t tell me you came here with empty hands.”

Shaking his head, Everett pulls a bottle out of the bag he’s carrying. “Always so greedy, Andrew. You don’t even deserve this nice bottle of scotch I have here.”

Andrew grins and reaches for it. “Care for a drink?”

Everett grins back. “I thought you’d never ask.”

Technically, they are both on duty and not really allowed to drink. But then again so is everyone else, and no one really cares. Andrew figures he can indulge himself just this once. He finds some glasses and pours himself and Everett a drink. Over the course of the afternoon, one turns into two, two turn into three and at one point Andrew stops counting. It’s just like the old days. The only difference is that instead of a dorm now a tent is filled with laughter and silly stories. It’s plain old fun and Andrew’s sides are already hurting from laughing so much.

By the time there’s another knock on Andrew’s door, the sun is already low in the sky and the bottle of scotch is lying on the floor, empty. He is sprawled on his cot while Everett lounges in the chair by the desk. They both laugh when Andrew croaks out a barely discernible, “Come in!”

At first all Andrew can do is stare. There is Eddie, standing in the opening of his tent, with the setting sun creating a warm orange glow around him that makes his blond curls look fiery. It takes Andrew’s breath away for a moment, and later he will blame all of this on the alcohol. Right now, he is too stunned to react until Everett throws the cap of the bottle at him.

“Earth to Andy!” he drawls amused. “Someone’s here to see you.”

With a jolt, Andrew sits up on the cot and barely manages to keep his balance. The last thing he needs right now is to fall face first to the floor in front of his lieutenant.

“Eddie!” he greets a little too loudly, and a little too late, but Eddie just looks at him with a quirky smile on his face. His eyes are dancing with amusement. He looks mesmerizing.

“I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday and give you your present, but I can see that you already have one hell of a party,” Eddie says. Then he turns to Everett. “Good evening, sir.”

It’s only then that Andrew realizes that Eddie has his guitar slung over his back.

“Are you going to sing for me?” he asks before his brain catches up with him. “That’s so nice of you, Eddie.”

To Andrew’s utter disappointment, Eddie shakes his head. “I was, but I’m not going to anymore.”

“Why?” Andrew whines, and he knows he sounds like a petulant child. Another thing he will blame on the alcohol come morning.

“Because you’re drunk and I’d say it’s pretty likely you’re going to fall asleep during the first verse from what you’ve told me of your past escapades.”

Next to him, Everett chuckles. “So that’s the famous lieutenant who takes care of you and has the voice of an angel?”

From his perch at the door Eddie frowns at him, and Andrew in turn glowers at Everett. “You weren’t supposed to say that. And why aren’t you as drunk as I am, anyway?” he asks accusingly.

Everett just laughs, stands up and pats Andrew on the shoulder. “Because unlike you I have been enjoying each and every one of Melbourne’s bars and built up a tolerance.” He glances at Eddie. “And now I think it’s time to leave. Don’t want my company to miss me. Have a good night, Andy. I think you’re going to be in good hands now, old pal.”

With a wink, Everett leaves his tent and for a second Andrew considers throwing his pillow after his best friend from a lifetime ago but in the end decides against it because he’s pretty sure he would miss anyway. Instead he turns to look at Eddie who’s still standing in the doorway and taking in the state of Andrew’s tent.

With a soft sigh Eddie gently places his guitar on the ground and gathers up the letters and parcels that litter the floor.

“I take it you had a great afternoon?” he asks casually.

Andrew lets himself fall back onto his cot. “Yeah,” he smiles. “That was my old friend from college, Everett Pope. He’s a captain now, too. At just twenty-four, can you believe it?”

“Well, if he’s anything like you, I sure can,” Eddie comments, putting a stack of letters onto Andrew’s desk.

Andrew shrugs. “Everett’s a good guy. But I’m still a lot more lucky than he is.”

Eddie picks up the blanket from underneath Andrew’s cot and hands it to him. “And why is that?”

Andrew smiles up at him. “Because I’ve got you.”

He doesn’t realize how true the words are until they are spoken. Eddie pauses and looks at him, an indecipherable look on his face. He turns around, reaching for his guitar, and for a moment Andrew thinks he’s said something wrong and Eddie’s going to leave, and he tries to ignore the disappointment he feels. But Eddie surprises him by sitting down on the edge of Andrew’s cot, guitar in his lap, fingers idly plucking notes from it.

“Andy?” Eddie starts, sounding hesitant. Andrew feels fuzzy all over because even in his drunken haze he realizes that it’s the first time Eddie’s used his nickname.

“Will you play for me?” Andrew asks him again, and this time Eddie nods.

It takes a while for Andrew’s alcohol-addled brain to recognize the song that Eddie begins to play, but when he does he closes his eyes in happiness and lets the notes flow through him. It’s an Australian folk song that every Marine probably knows by heart now because it’s so popular among the men.

“I’d spin you around for a waltz right now if I wasn’t so sure I’d trip over my own two feet in the process and probably hurt both of us,” Andrew mumbles once Eddie finished playing, already half-asleep.

Next to him, Eddie laughs quietly. “We wouldn’t have any music if you spun me around. And anyway, who says you’re leading?”

Andrew opens his eyes just enough so he can make out Eddie. “You can lead for all I care. Or we could switch. Doesn’t matter, really.”

“Well, how about we save the dancing for another night and stick to me playing and you trying to sleep for now?” Eddie suggests.

“Good idea,” Andrew agrees, yawning widely.

He’s almost asleep when Eddie stops his song for a moment, and Andrew feels Eddie taking one of his hands into his own. Eddie’s hands are squeezing his gently and Andrew has never felt more precious in his life before. He falls asleep with a smile on his face and Eddie’s words ringing in his ears.

“Happy birthday, Andy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick thank you to everyone who left kudos or commented on this story! I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as well!


	5. Melbourne - September 1943

**5\. Melbourne - Early September 1943**

“Eddie? Do you have a moment?”

Andrew tries very hard not to grin when he sees the relieved faces of Eddie’s platoon when Eddie tells them to take five. Eddie walks over to him, a satisfied smirk on his face. Andrew knows that Eddie’s training sessions can be brutal. In the beginning of their acquaintance he’s made the mistake of taking Eddie up on the offer of a morning run which left him gasping for breath, totally humiliated, and Eddie grinning smugly from a hundred yards away. Since then he’s learned that there’s fit, and then there’s Eddie. Andrew always regarded himself as a very athletic person, playing various sports throughout school and college, but Eddie takes athletic to a whole new level that leaves many a man in their company reeling.

“You enjoy this, don’t you?” Andrew asks him once he’s sure they’re out of earshot of the men.

Eddie looks at him with wide innocent blue eyes. “I have no idea what you mean. I just like them to be prepared, is all.”

“Sure you do.”

He looks over to the exhausted men. Even though they now grumble and complain, Andrew knows that a time will come when they will thank Eddie for his rigorous training because it will save their lives. Soon they’ll be leaving the safety of Melbourne and some of them will see battle for the first time. He briefly wonders how many of them won’t return, how many letters he will have to write to anxious families at home, and shakes his head to clear his thoughts. He’ll cross that bridge when he comes to it.

“So, what did you want to talk to me about?” Eddie asks after a moment.

Andrew sits down next to him in a sunny spot and stretches his legs.

“We’ll be shipping out in about three weeks,” he simply says. Gazing over at Eddie he sees quiet acceptance in his eyes.

“Alright.”

Andrew huffs out a laugh. “Alright? That’s all you have to say to this?”

Eddie shrugs. “It’s not like I can change it. They tell us where we go and we go. That’s how it works. Our vacation here had to end some day.”

“Yeah,” Andrew sighs. He catches Eddie’s eyes. “It was nice though, wasn’t it?”

With a small smile, Eddie nods. “It sure was.”

They sit in silence for a moment. Andrew knows that it will be only a matter of time until the news will spread throughout the camp, turning the relative calmness they’ve grown used to during the last few months into frenzy. A sudden thought strikes him, and he turns excitedly towards Eddie.

“Let’s go into town,” he says.

This startles a laugh out of Eddie. “Now?”

“Yeah, why not?” Andrew’s already standing up and offering Eddie his hand. “This will probably be our last chance.”

Eddie shakes his head, a fond smile on his face. “I’ve got a platoon waiting for me, Andy. In case you’ve forgotten.”

Andrew rolls his eyes. “Oh, come on. Be a nice officer and give them the rest of the day off.”

“What would my C.O. say to that?” Eddie muses, already reaching for Andrew’s hand.

Andrew pulls him up. “He’d say: Get the hell on with it, Lieutenant.”

And Eddie does. The men are dismissed and it doesn’t take Eddie long to shower and change. Andrew leaves one of his other lieutenants in charge of the company and promises to be back by evening, and half an hour later they’re right in the heart of Melbourne.

“Mind telling me now why we’re in the city?” Eddie asks him while they leisurely stroll through the streets. “You wouldn’t have gotten so excited and dragged me away from camp just for sightseeing. Something, I might add, we’ve already done so often I feel like I now Melbourne almost as well as my hometown.”

Eddie knows him too well, so Andrew simply grins at him and says, “It’s a surprise.”

“Oh,” Eddie says, amused. “Very mysterious. If I’m not mistaken we’re heading to our favorite park.”

Andrew shrugs, not wanting to give anything away. “Perhaps we are.”

Eddie is right, of course. There wasn’t a day spent in Melbourne when they didn’t visit the little park they discovered on their first trip together and Andrew is not about to break tradition on their last day in town. When they reach the entrance to the park he stops, however, and Eddie turns to him in surprise.

“Why are we stopping?”

“Because,” Andrew begins and tugs him away from the park and into a little side street, “we’re not going to the park alone.”

Eddie looks amused. “Don’t tell me you’ve arranged dates for us at the last minute. We’ve only known each other a couple of months and you’re already bored of me?”

Andrew laughs and shoves him playfully. “Don’t be silly. I don’t think I could ever get tired of you as long as you keep working your magic on that guitar of yours.”

And he means it, although it’s not just because of the guitar that Eddie holds a special place in his heart. Something about Eddie makes Andrew’s days brighter when he sees him, no matter whether they’re talking business or spending a lazy afternoon in Andrew’s tent. He’s never had a friendship that developed so fast. It feels like he’s known Eddie his whole life, and sometimes that scares him, because there are no guarantees where they’re going in a few weeks, and one of them might not come back. After just a few months with Eddie Andrew’s already at the point where he can’t imagine a life without Eddie in it, and he knows that this kind of attachment can be dangerous and potentially devastating in their line of work, but he can’t help it, no matter what he tells himself. So he’s stopped thinking about the possible consequences and instead enjoys every minute he gets to spend with Eddie. And right now all he wants is to make their last day away from it all count and give them both something to remember their time together by, something that will last and that no war can take away from them.

He stops in front of a shop that offers the services of a photographer.

“You want to have your picture taken?” Eddie asks, looking curiously at the offers in the window.

Andrew rolls his eyes. “No,” he says, “I want them to take a picture of us in the park. Only if you’d like to as well, of course,” he hurriedly adds. “I just thought it might be nice to have something to remind us of the good days we spent here.”

Eddie smiles softly at him, and Andrew tries very hard to ignore the fluttering of his heart.

“That’s …” Eddie pauses for a moment. “I’d really like that, Andy,” he tells him softly. “It’s a marvelous idea. Let’s go inside, then, shall we?”

Luckily, the photographer has time for them and it doesn’t take them long to explain to him what they want. The trip back to the park is short and when they find the little patch of grass they think of as their spot they sit down as they normally would and the photographer goes to work. He takes several shots, and in the end they do one last picture of them standing at ease next to each other in front of the tree.

“All done,” the photographer says, telling them to come by later to collect the pictures.

Andrew flops back down onto the grass. “That was more work than I’d anticipated.”

Eddie laughs. “It was your idea,” he tells him, lying down on the grass and closing his eyes, looking content. “And anyway, I think it was fun.”

“You do?”

Eddie nods. “Yeah. My mom will be especially delighted to see the prom picture we took at the end.”

Andrew looks over at him in amusement. “Prom picture?”

“Well, with uniforms instead of tuxes, of course, and minus a girl at my side,” Eddie concedes. “But it’s still better than anything she’s gotten before, so she’s going to be delighted.”

Andrew’s eyes soften. “Sometimes I forget that you never finished high school.”

Eddie shrugs. “It doesn’t matter. I did what I had to do at the time to put food on the table. That was a lot more important than getting a diploma and going to a ball. And it led me here, didn’t it? That’s not so bad.”

“Yeah,” Andrew agrees. “Can’t argue with that.”

“Although,” Eddie says, glancing over at Andrew with an amused glint in his eyes, “if you wanted to make my Mama really happy, you could wear a dress the next time we take pictures.”

Andrew laughs and shoves him away so that Eddie rolls over. “You’d wish. I might be persuaded to put on a kimono once we reach Tokyo and win this war, but that’s as far as I’ll go.”

Eddie props himself up and grins down at him. “Is that a promise?”

Shaking his head, Andrew says, “You’re impossible, you know that? But yes, it’s a promise if you insist.”

He shakes Eddie’s hand to seal the deal.

“Now, if that isn’t some incentive to stay alive, I don’t know what is,” Eddie says, still grinning. “My mom will probably put the picture up on the wall, frame it and everything.”

Andrew buries his head in his hands, already regretting his spur of the moment decision. “You’ll be the death of me,” he tells Eddie.

Eddie just laughs at him. “You dug your own grave there, Andy.”

“I hate it when you’re right,” he grumbles, although some small part of him already looks forward to the moment. He knows they still have a long way to go, and many fights and battles to go through, and it doesn’t do much good to think about things that may very well never happen, but there’s a small chance that they will both come out of this war alright and he somehow can’t think of a better way of celebrating than taking a picture in a kimono with Eddie right by his side.

They spend the rest of the afternoon in the shade of the tree, talking about everything and nothing and simply enjoying some precious last few moments of peace in each other’s company. When it’s time to go pick up their pictures they don’t open them immediately. Instead, they pay for them and take a ride back into camp. Andrew’s other lieutenants managed to keep the company in check while they were away and there is nothing left to do except bid everyone goodnight.

Andrew retires to his tent with Eddie just behind him, and it’s only there that they open the envelope. The first two pictures are the prom pictures as Eddie called them, and Andrew has to admit that he looks a lot happier in them than he does in his own prom picture his mom has framed at home.

The next two pictures show them sitting on the grass, grinning up at the camera. They both look impossibly young, handsome and carefree in their uniforms. The pictures capture the feeling of their time in Melbourne perfectly, and Andrew hands one of them over to Eddie who touches it reverently.

There are two more pictures in the envelope, and Andrew is a little confused because they only paid for the four pictures they’ve already looked at, two for their families and one for each of them. He shakes them out and his heart stutters a little when he sees them.

In contrast to the other four the two extra pictures are not posed. They capture him and Eddie in unguarded moments and look so much more real because of it. Wordlessly, he picks up the one where Eddie is full-out laughing at something Andrew must have said but can’t remember now. His eyes are all crinkled up in laughter and he’s in the process of doubling over while Andrew looks at him with what he’ll never admit is a pout.

Next to him, Eddie is holding the other picture in his hands. It’s different from Andrew’s but just as wonderful in its own way. While Eddie is looking at the camera, one eyebrow raised and clearly impatient for the photographer’s next direction, Andrew is gazing at Eddie with a fond smile on his face.

 “I wonder why he gave us these pictures free of charge,” Eddie says quietly, still staring at the picture in his hands. Andrew wonders if he’s aware of his thumb gently stroking the side of it.

“Maybe because he saw an opportunity, took a picture and found it too … personal to throw away?” Andrew suggests.

Eddie looks up at him. “May I keep this one?”

“Of course.” Andrew nods.

He watches Eddie put the pictures away, feeling touched when Eddie puts them right next to the pictures of his family he always carries with him. Then Eddie turns to him with soft eyes and an oddly shy smile tugging at his lips.

“Thank you for today, Andy. And for the pictures. I really had a good time and I’m glad you persuaded me to go into town with you. ” He squeezes Andrew’s arm briefly. “I don’t think I could have found a better friend than you in all this madness.”

A warm feeling spreads through Andrew’s chest and he smiles back at Eddie. “You’re more than welcome, Eddie. Believe me, the feeling is mutual.”

They say goodnight, then, and Andrew watches Eddie go out into the night with wistful longing in his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thank you to everyone who's read and liked this story so far!
> 
> This here is the last chapter of the Melbourne Arc. It was somewhat inspired by a scene in episode 3 of Changi, where Leon Ford's character takes a picture with his girlfriend before he is shipped out. If you guys haven't watched Changi yet, I highly recommend it.
> 
> The next five chapters will cover Andy and Eddie's journey to New Britain and the time they spent there which means lots of rain, jungle rot and worry from Eddie's part. The chapters will be from his point of view.


	6. Solomon Sea - 31.12.1943

**6\. Solomon Sea - 31.12.1943**

“So, tomorrow’s the day, huh?” Eddie says quietly as he approaches, not wanting to startle Andrew. His company commander has his arms propped up on the railing of the troop ship King Company is currently stationed on. It’s nighttime, and the stars are out in all their multitudes. It would be breathtakingly beautiful, especially after all the rain they’ve had the last few weeks, if it wasn’t for the sounds of Navy artillery in the distance.

Andrew motions for Eddie to stand beside him and nods. “Another year, another battle. Tomorrow we’ll find out how well we’ve trained our boys,” he says with a sigh and closes his eyes. “I fear for a lot of them tomorrow will be the first and last day of the new year.”

Eddie knows Andrew is right. It would be foolish to think that all their men will survive the coming day or the following weeks. If New Britain turns out to be anything like Guadalcanal they’ll be in for some rough times. They both know it and there’s no doubt in Eddie’s mind that they’ve done all they can to prepare their men for what is to come. Now their fate isn’t entirely up to them and all they can do is lead their company to the best of their abilities through this battle and hope for the best. Eddie’s made his peace with that. Andrew, however, is still gazing towards the black shape of New Britain in the distance with a despondent look on his face and Eddie simply can’t have that, so he tries to think of something to lighten the mood.

“At least we get some fireworks for New Year’s Eve,” he finally remarks with a lopsided grin.

Andrew turns around and stares at him for a moment as if he can’t quite believe what Eddie just said and Eddie can’t really blame him. Then he snorts and shakes his head in amused disbelief. “Anyone ever tell you that you have a horrible sense of humor, Eddie?”

With a shrug, Eddie bumps his shoulder with Andrew’s, feeling relieved and ridiculously happy to see his company commander finally smile. “My humor may be a bit morbid at times, but it got you to crack a smile, so your own can’t be that much better,” he tells Andrew with a chuckle.

“Must be all your bad influence, then,” Andrew mutters and turns his gaze back towards their destination but Eddie can see the twinkle in his eyes and the way the corners of his mouth are still pulled up slightly in a smile. He counts this as a win.

Resting his arms on the railing beside Andrew’s and looking out at New Britain in the darkness, Eddie says after a moment, “So, any plans for New Year’s Day except landing on an occupied island and trying to stay alive?”

Andrew pretends to think about that. “Maybe trying to keep my company alive as well … I think that would be good for my reputation,” he muses jokingly.

Eddie nods with a wry smile. “Probably. Might even get you another promotion.”

This startles another laugh out of Andrew. “Oh god, no. Can you imagine me as a battalion commander?”

“I can, actually,” Eddie says easily, because it’s the truth. He can see Andrew doing a lot of things, and doing them well on top of it. He knows that Andrew is not perfect, but sometimes he can’t help but think that Andrew would be good at anything if he puts his mind to it, with the exception of music, probably. It’s one of the reasons Eddie’s so glad to serve under him: what Andrew may lack in talent in some regards he more than makes up for with dedication and honesty, and Eddie would rather follow someone who cares about his men into battle than someone who only cares about himself and his own achievements.

Beside him, Andrew is looking at him with amused eyes. “You haven’t even seen me in action as a company commander yet … how can you be so sure I’d make a good battalion commander?”

“It’s not so different, is it?” Eddie says. “It’s just more people under your command, more decisions to make, more things to keep track of, more responsibility.” He shrugs. “I don’t really have to see you in action to know you’re good at tactics and strategy. What’s even more important is that you care about each and every single one of the men under your command. I know I can trust you with my life because you value it as much as your own. That’s what makes you a good company commander. And it would make you a good battalion commander as well.”

Andrew’s smile is soft and the gentle hand he lays on Eddie’s arm for the briefest of moments makes warmth spread through Eddie’s body.

“You think very highly of me,” Andrew observes quietly. “I hope you’ll still feel that way after tomorrow.”

“I’m sure I will,” Eddie tells him, without a shred of doubt. “Just, promise me something?”

There’s a slight frown on Andrew’s face when he says, “Anything.”

Eddie’s heart does a little flip at that.

“Think about yourself as well?” he asks quietly. “Don’t put yourself in any unnecessary danger.”

“Only if you promise the same,” Andrew say softly.

Eddie nods. “Of course,” he agrees.

Before them, New Britain is slowly growing larger and Eddie knows it won’t be long before their transport ship will stop its advance. In a few hours they will hit the beaches. He’s glad they won’t be the first to land on the island. The main landing happened five days ago and Eddie hopes that the beaches are safe by now so that their own landing will be a safe one.  

“You should get some sleep,” Andrew says next to him, also looking toward the island that may very well be the last place they will ever see. “It’ll be dawn soon.”

Eddie raises an eyebrow. “What about you?”

Despite his smile Andrew looks as sad and solemn as he had when Eddie walked up to him a few minutes ago. “I don’t think I can sleep. I’m pretty sure my thoughts will keep me awake even if I try.”

“Well,” Eddie says, wanting nothing more than to make Andrew smile again, “then I’m going to keep you company, if you don’t mind. Can’t have your mind going round in circles all night, can we?”

“I suppose not,” Andrew says, and Eddie can hear the gratefulness in his voice. “Why don’t we sit?”

They both sit down on the ground with their backs against the railing and shoulders brushing. The deck may not be comfortable, but Eddie knows that it will be the last comfort of civilization he’ll have until the battle is over. He pulls up his legs, wraps his arms around them and rests his cheek on top, looking up at Andrew

“Have you heard back from your family yet?” Eddie asks him, hoping to clear Andrew’s thoughts away from the coming battle. “Did they like the picture?”

A bright smile appears on Andrews face and Eddie’s heart beats a little faster. He really likes that smile. “Got the letter a week before we left Milne Bay,” Andrew tells him. “My mom and sister thought we looked very handsome.”

“And your dad?” Eddie inquires.

Andrew laughs. “My dad thought we were standing way too formal and told me to loosen up.”

Eddie huffs out a laugh at that. “You should show him the other pictures some time. He’ll probably like those a lot more.”

“Yes, he would,” Andrew agrees. “How about your family? What did they say?”                    

“They were absolutely delighted,” Eddie recalls fondly. “The letter they sent back was the longest I’ve received in a good while. Everyone had something to say about the picture, and you know how large my family is. They agree with your family that we were very fine-looking and my sisters want you to know that you are very handsome and can come visit us anytime.”

Andrew laughs out loud and it reminds Eddie of Melbourne, of their time spent on that little patch of grass under the tree. “They really wrote that?”

Eddie nods. “Yeah, and then some. I think they’re quite infatuated with you. Let’s see if they still like you when they see you in a kimono.”

He grins at Andrew who shoves him away playfully in return. “I’ll have you know that I’m going to look very dashing in a kimono, thank you very much.”

“Promises, promises,” Eddie grins.

“You just wait and see,” Andrew tells him. “I’m going to take your breath away and sweep you off your feet and then I’ll be the one laughing at you.”

“I’m really looking forward to that,” Eddie says, chuckling. “And my mom is, too, by the way, though she’s not sure you have the hips to pull it off.”

Andrew stares at him for a moment, clearly deciding whether Eddie is joking or not.

“Now you’re just messing with me,” Andrew finally says.

Eddie laughs. “You got me there.” Andrew shakes his head at him fondly and Eddie’s grin softens. “But she did frame the prom picture and put it on the family wall.”

“She did?” Andrew sounds surprised.

Eddie nods. “I think she likes you,” he says with a small smile.

They spend the rest of the night like this, just sitting close together, sometimes joking around, sometimes talking about more serious things, and sometimes not talking at all. Dawn creeps up the horizon way too fast for Eddie’s liking, and it’s not long after that that they have to get up and make sure their men are ready. The atmosphere on deck is tense, filled with the anticipation of hundreds of men from various companies, King among them. When the time comes to hit the beaches, Eddie catches Andrew’s gaze one last time. They share a quiet moment amidst all the chaos, both remembering the promise they made last night to take care of themselves, and then they’re out in the water, fighting for their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for the weekly update. As I've said in the last chapter the New Britain arc of this story starts now. The following chapters will all be from Eddie's point of view until the Pavuvu arc begins with chapter 11. So far, 24 chapters are now writting and I'm currently working on the last chapter of second Pavuvu arc.  
> Thanks once again to everyone who's reading this story. If you have any suggestions or anything you'd like to see please feel free to say so.


	7. Cape Gloucester - January 1944

**7\. Cape Gloucester - January 1944**

Eddie knows that in his mind Cape Gloucester will always be associated with one thing: rain. They landed on the First of January on New Britain and it hasn’t stopped raining since. It’s the middle of the monsoon season and they’ve been told to expect a constant downpour. Even after just a few days on the island all of Eddie’s things are soaked, and he knows the rest of the company is not faring much better. His boots are squelching in the mud and his feet are squelching in the boots, and he’s not sure what exactly he’ll find once he has the time to take off his boots and change his socks.

Luckily for him, he still has Andrew amidst all this wetness. As company commander, Andrew has his own tent that is at least semi-dry, and Eddie knows he’s always welcomed there. All his letters and keepsakes, his guitar among them, are kept in a waterproof chest among Andrew’s things. Sometimes he feels a little guilty that he has a much closer relationship with Andrew than the other lieutenants have and enjoys some privileges that come with that friendship, but Eddie makes sure to never ask Andrew for anything and only takes what Andrew offers of his own free will to put his mind to rest.

Right now, Eddie is on his way to Andrew’s tent after a night filled with fear, terror and death. The rising sun, even though it is hidden beneath heavy rainclouds, slowly turns the pitch blackness of the night into a murky, watery grey as he slowly makes his way through the trees on muddy paths that are beginning to turn into small creeks. He has to be careful with every step he takes. There are roots hidden in the mud, sometimes snakes, and it’s easy to lose one’s footing and fall face down into the brownish muck. By now, everyone in their company has become stuck in the mud at least once since they’ve arrived on the island, and it’s become quite clear to all of them that they’re not only battling the enemy here but also nature as well.

Somehow, he manages to find his way back to Andrew’s tent without slipping and falling in the mud. There’s a light on inside the tent, and Eddie doesn’t hesitate to announce his presence before stepping out of the rain and inside Andrew’s temporary home.

“Eddie,” Andrew breathes, sounding tired but happy to see him. “Can I offer you some coffee?”

Eddie smiles. “Coffee would be great, thanks.”

Stripping off his rifle and placing it against the tent’s wall, Eddie steps a little closer and gratefully accepts the cup of coffee Andrew hands him. Their fingers brush briefly. Taking the first sip feels heavenly and rejuvenating and it’s exactly what he needs after a night on high alert with no sleep. The coffee doesn’t seem to have the same effect on Andrew, however. He yawns and rubs a hand across his eyes tiredly.

“How are you feeling?” Eddie asks, looking at him in concern. There are dark circles beneath Andrew’s eyes and Eddie’s not sure whether that’s blood or mud staining his temple a dark brown. He hopes it’s the latter.

Andrew shrugs. “How does one feel after a night like this? Exhausted doesn’t quite cut it, I think.”

Eddie nods in understanding. “You should get some sleep.”

“I can’t,” Andrew says. When Eddie is about to protest, he holds up his hand and adds, “I want to, believe me, Eddie, and I’ve tried. But my mind is on overdrive right now and won’t let me which is why I thought it would be a good idea to get the paperwork for last night done.”

Eddie’s eyes shift to the mess on Andrew’s desk. Andrew sighs. “Alright, it’s not working out that well so far, but it keeps me occupied.”

“Why don’t you let me write up the report while you go and lay down?” Eddie suggests. “We could talk a bit.”

It’s a testament to how tired Andrew must feel that he complies without much fuss. Eddie seats himself on the vacated chair and organizes the papers on Andrew’s desk before he picks up a pen, a blank sheet and jots down the formalities like date, location and company identification.

“I can’t believe we’re still here,” Andrew says quietly from the cot and makes Eddie stop midsentence. Turning around, he can see Andrew shaking his head in disbelief. “Five banzai charges in one hour, Eddie. I honestly didn’t think our lines would hold during the last one.”

“To be honest,” Eddie admits, “I think they’d have overrun us if they’d tried one more time. We’re lucky they didn’t.”

“I don’t feel very lucky,” Andrew tells him quietly. “We still lost a lot of good men.”

Eddie can hear the pain in Andrew’s voice and feels it as his own. Getting up from the chair he crouches before Andrew’s cot and puts a comforting hand on Andrew’s shoulder. “We did,” he agrees. “But a lot of good men are also still alive because you made the right decisions tonight. You kept us organized, located the gaps in our defenses and closed them, and you got us ammo when we needed it most. All of this saved lives tonight, Andrew, and I can tell you that I do feel very lucky because tonight could have gone a whole lot different with someone else in command.”

“There are plenty of good officers out there, Eddie,” Andrew tells him half-heartedly.

Eddie nods. “I know. But you held off five charges tonight, all in the span of an hour. It wouldn’t surprise me if this gets you a promotion, or at least a medal.”

Andrew shrugs. “I don’t care for either.”

“Well,” Eddie says, with an amused smile, “I didn’t either a year ago, but someone was very eager to give me a battlefield commission anyway. I believe you told me you were impressed by what I did on Guadalcanal. So, let me tell you one thing, Andrew: right now I am very impressed by what you did on Cape Gloucester and if I have any say in it you’ll get the proper recognition for it..”

Hiding his face in his hands, Andrew mumbles, “I’ve created a monster.”

Laughing, Eddie swats his shoulder. “Don’t be melodramatic. I’ve just learned from the best.”

Andrew lowers his hands and Eddie’s surprised to find his cheeks slightly reddened in embarrassment. “Thank you, Eddie. I really appreciate it.”

“You’re welcome,” Eddie says, squeezing his shoulder once more. He allows himself to brush the hair out of Andrew’s eyes, feeling for any cuts or bruises in the process. He is relieved when he finds none. “Now, why don’t you close your eyes and try to get some sleep while I finish the report and put in a good word for you?”

Andrew sighs. “You really don’t have to do that for me, you know?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Eddie tells him, picking up the pen. “I’ll gladly do all your paperwork if it means I’ll be out of the rain for an hour.”

He starts to write, then, and everything is quiet except for the constant patter of raindrops on the roof of the tent. It takes Eddie a while to realize that Andrew’s breathing has evened out and a glance over his shoulder confirms that Andrew is fast asleep. Eddie finds himself smiling fondly at the sight in front of him. He can just imagine a moment like this, maybe back home where everything is more peaceful and quiet, with Andrew resting on a comfortable bed with clean sheets, no mud marring his face and no worries to keep him awake.

The urge to protect and shield Andrew from everything that troubles him is so sudden and strong that Eddie drops his pen in surprise. He shakes his head at himself and bends down to pick it up before he turns back around to face the report on the desk. He has work to do, Eddie tells himself, and starts writing, trying very hard not to think about Andrew or the way his heart is beating furiously in his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick thank you once more for your lovely comments and the kudos! 
> 
> I'm not sure if there will be an update next Saturday because I will be away at a conference from Friday until Wednesday. I'll try to get it posted but I make no promises ;-)


	8. Cape Gloucester - March 1944

**8\. Cape Gloucester - March 1944**

“Hey, Burgie,” Eddie hears someone say behind them while they trudge through the jungle near the Numundo Plantation on New Britain, their current objective. He thinks it might be Snafu but he’s too exhausted to turn around and make sure.

“Yeah?” Burgin replies just behind him, sounding tired and irritated.

“You know how this was supposed to be a three-day patrol?” Snafu asks in that drawl of his.

“Yeah?” Burgin repeats, and Eddie imagines he’s rolling his eyes.

“Well,” Snafu says, dragging the word out, “I’m pretty sure a week is longer than three days and seeing as that’s how long we’ve been walking through the mud around this damn plantation now, I think either command fucked up, doesn’t care or had really bad teachers at school and never learned that seven is actually a lot more than three.”

Eddie almost snorts at that and glances at Andrew who is walking next to him to see if he’s listening as well. Judging by the small amused smile on his face, he is.

“Oh, shut up, Snaf, and let me walk in peace,” Burgin grumbles behind them, earning a few chuckles from the Marines around him.

Morale is, to put it mildly, pretty low right now. A week ago, they left Bitokaba and moved south towards the Numundo Plantation at the base of the peninsula to scout the area. So far, they’ve had to deal with daily ambushes by Japanese who look just as bad as they do and in some cases even worse. After three months on New Britain, King Company is a shadow of its former strength. Without adequate food and weakened by constant rain and living in the mud, everyone in their company has lost several pounds and some look dangerously thin. Eddie hasn’t seen himself in a mirror for months but he can feel how prominent his cheekbones have become and see the shadows of his ribs on his chest. Luckily, he doesn’t feel weak or sick yet, unlike some unfortunate members of King who have come down with malaria on top of everything else. Their numbers are dwindling by the day, some killed or wounded, others too weak and sick to go on.

The few Japanese they got a good look at seemed even worse off. They’ve been on this island a lot longer than the Marines and some look like walking corpses. Eddie sometimes marvels at their strength of will that keeps them fighting even though they can barely stand. Most of the time, however, he finds it tedious. The battle of New Britain is almost over, and it’s clear by now that the Japanese won’t stand a chance of winning. He wishes the last few stragglers would just give up and turn themselves in. He knows they won’t, though, because they consider it to be a great dishonor not to die in battle. It’s that determination, if nothing else, that makes them a terrifying enemy.

They reach the plantation around midday and stop for a break beneath the coconut trees. Eddie assigns a squad to guard duty before he sits down against a tree trunk and closes his eyes tiredly, letting the light rain fall down on his face. He could fall asleep like that, and maybe he does. He has no idea how long he’s sat there when a voice next to him says, “Care for some coconut milk?”

Slowly, Eddie opens his eyes and finds Andrew smiling down at him softly, holding two coconuts in his hands.

“One of the natives climbed up and lopped some coconuts off for us,” Andrew explains, sitting down next to Eddie and handing him one of the fruits. “I figured you’d like something other than water after all these days.”

Eddie nods and slashes his coconut open. “Thank you, Andrew. I really appreciate it.”

Even though he’s not the greatest fan of coconut milk, he welcomes the taste when it hits his throat. It feels rejuvenating and delightfully new after so many days of living off just water, rice and rations.

“How are you holding up?” Andrew asks him after a moment.

Eddie looks at him in confusion. “Well, all things considered?” he says, unsure what Andrew means. “I’m still standing, aren’t I?”

Andrew smiles. “I guess so.”

“How about you? How are your feet doing?” Eddie asks, looking down at Andrew’s shoes which seem to be rotting off his feet just as much as Eddie’s are.

Shrugging, Andrew says, “I’m doing fine. Nothing I can do about the feet, though. Doc says I should keep them dry.” He shakes his head incredulously.

Eddie grins at him. “He tells everyone that. One day, someone will get tired of hearing it and drown him in mud or something.”

“If he keeps that up, it’s more than likely,” Andrew agrees. “It’s not his fault, though, that the island makes it impossible to follow his advice.”

“True,” Eddie says, absentmindedly rubbing his right shoulder where his own case of jungle rot is developing rather nicely and slowly spreading down his back. His feet are not as bad off as Andrew’s yet, but it’s only a matter of time until every step will feel like agony and there’s nothing anyone can do about it until they get off this island or at least into some dry huts for a prolonged period of time. It would do their whole company good to get out of the mud and heal their wounds but Eddie knows they have some days in the jungle still ahead of them until that time comes.

“We should still change your bandages later,” Eddie tells Andrew. “They may not be dry, but at least they’re clean.”

Andrew looks at Eddie’s shoulder pointedly. “That goes for you as well.”

Eddie rolls his eyes, but a smile tugs at his lips and Andrew’s concern spreads through him like warmth. “Of course, sir.”

Andrew chuckles and moves around to get comfortable, pressing his shoulder right against Eddie’s in the process. “Wake me in twenty minutes?”

“Sure,” Eddie says. He watches Andrew close his eyes and it isn’t long until his breathing evens out. It always amazes Eddie how quickly Andrew can fall asleep in any situation. It’s a gift he normally envies. Right now, though, he cannot begrudge Andrew a few minutes of rest. Andrew looks exhausted and haggard and Eddie can’t help but worry. More than once he’s caught Andrew distributing his own meager food rations among the men. It’s a noble gesture, especially since food is pretty scarce, but Eddie wishes Andrew wouldn’t do that. He’s talked to their corpsman about it a few days ago, not knowing who else to go to with his worries. Doc Katz had told him that Andrew couldn’t afford to lose any more weight, that one day he would be too weak to go on if he kept this up. Since then Eddie’s tried to keep an eye on Andrew and made it a habit to eat his meals with him to make sure that Andrew ate his portion. It doesn’t feel like enough, though. Andrew is still wasting away a little more each day right in front of his eyes and there’s nothing Eddie can do about that. So he does what he can: he watches and worries and tries his best to keep Andrew well and give him the food and rest he needs. He hopes that in the end it will be enough.

With a sigh Eddie looks down at the sleeping man next to him. He can feel Andrew’s shoulder bones where he is leaning against him and is surprised when they shift and Andrew’s head comes down to rest against his shoulder. It feels comfortable in an unexpected way and Eddie can’t help but enjoy how Andrew’s barely dry hair brushes against his neck and sends a tingling down his spine. He looks around, trying to see if anyone noticed or cares because this could be dangerous, but no one pays them any attention except for the Doc who’s nodding at him with a small smile. For a moment Eddie allows himself to relax and indulge in the feeling of having Andrew so close to him. He can’t close his eyes because he has to wake Andrew soon, but Eddie knows if he would, he’d dream of a bright sunny day in Melbourne with Andrew right by his side where the rain, mud and hunger of New Britain couldn’t touch them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for missing the update last week, but like I've said I was attending two conferences and had to prepare for my talk and couldn't find the time to upload the next chapter. So here it is, just one week late XD Enjoy your weekend, everyone, and see you next Saturday for chapter nine =)


	9. Cape Gloucester - March 1944

**9\. Cape Gloucester - March 1944**

It’s early in the morning, mist hanging in the air and turning the jungle into a murky grayish place, when a noise startles Eddie out of sleep and almost causes him to fall out of his hammock. It takes him a moment to get his bearings and realize what – or better said, who - woke him up. Andrew is standing next to him, grinning rather sheepishly and looking more awake and happy than anyone has any right to when the sun has not even come up yet.

Eddie lets himself fall back into his hammock. He looks up at Andrew in bewilderment. “Andrew? What’s going on? Has something happened?”

“Shh,” Andrew shushes him with a finger to his lips. “We don’t want to wake the others. Come on, we’re having breakfast.”

To say that Eddie is utterly confused would be an understatement. He stares at Andrew for a moment to make sure he’s serious. When Andrew just keeps smiling at him Eddie rolls out of his hammock with a yawn, stretches his arms above his head to feel more awake, and is ready to go. Sleeping in his gear and boots does have its advantages, after all.

He follows Andrew quietly through camp, or as quietly as possible with their boots squelching in the mud with every step. They briefly stop at Andrew’s tent to pick up a little bundle filled with cans of peaches and some bread before Andrew leads them off into the dense shrub of the jungle around their camp. It takes them only a couple of minutes until they reach their destination.

“The hot springs, Andrew? Really? At,” Eddie glances at his watch, “four in the morning?”

“Yep,” Andrew replies, sitting down at the edge of one of the pools and spreading out their breakfast. “It’s a very nice place to have breakfast at. And I’ve noticed that you haven’t been here yet, so I figured I’d take matters into my own hands.”

Slowly, Eddie sits down next to him. He smiles fondly at Andrew. “Did you, huh?”

Andrew nods. Eddie watches him take off his shoes and pull up his trouser legs before he slips his feet into the warm water. A satisfied sigh escapes his lips and the worry lines on his face smooth out in relaxation as he closes his eyes. It takes him a moment to notice that Eddie hasn’t done the same.

“Come on, Eddie, take those boots off and get your feet into the water,” he urges, gesturing at Eddie’s boots. “I promise you won’t regret it.”

Eddie looks down at the steaming pool with skepticism. “Haven’t you had enough water to last you a lifetime?” he counters instead of pulling off his boots.

Andrew raises an eyebrow at him. “Is that what this is about? Too much rain in the last few weeks for Eddie Jones?”

“Make it months,” Eddie mumbles. “And no, it’s not that. I just don’t like taking my boots off. It makes my feet swell and hurt like hell. The last time I did I almost didn’t get my feet back into them.”

“I know the feeling,” Andrew tells him sympathetically. “But Doc says it’s not healthy for your feet.”

Eddie shrugs. “It’s probably not. But it hurts less.”

He turns his gaze to the warm water, the mist rising up from it and has to admit that it does look rather enticing.

“Come on, Eddie,” Andy teases with a grin. “Don’t be a spoilsport.”

“Oh, alright,” Eddie grumbles and tugs off one boot after the other. His socks are barely hanging onto his feet after three long months on New Britain. When he pulls their remains off he cannot hide a wince as he sees his feet for the first time in weeks. They’re sickly white and the skin is puffy and swollen. Slowly he slides them in the hot water. It hurts, at first, but after a moment the pain gives way to wonderful warmth and Eddie closes his eyes in relief.

“See?” Andrew asks him with a soft smile and kind eyes. “It does feel good, doesn’t it?”

Eddie opens one of his eyes to look at him. “You just want me to say that you were right and I was wrong.”

“Well,” Andrew says cheekily, “it is the truth.”

Eddie sighs and closes his eyes again, enjoying the warmth of the water. “Yeah,” he agrees softly. “It does feel good. Thank you for taking me here. I think I needed that little nudge.”

“Any time,” Andrew tells him. He opens up a can of peaches and hands a slice to Eddie. “I like to come here early in the morning or late at night when most of the men are sleeping. It’s nice sitting here, in the quiet, and watching the bats fly around.”

He points up at the trees and through the mist Eddie can see several large flying foxes hanging on the branches, enjoying their own fruity breakfast.

“It’s a wonder some of them are still alive after the heavy Navy bombardment before the landing,” Eddie muses. He takes a piece of bread from Andrew and leans back on his forearms to get a better look at the animals.

“Nature can be quite resilient,” Andrew says thoughtfully. “I find that reassuring, to tell you the truth. No matter how much we destroy, how much pain we cause, life will go on, some way or another. It gives me hope that after this war the world will be a better place, that good things can come out of all this horror.”

Eddie nods in agreement. “It’s good to be reminded of that, every now and then,” he says quietly. “Sometimes it’s hard to remember why we do this and not to give up hope of ever seeing home again. It’s been so long already.”

Andrew’s feet bump against his beneath the water. The touch sends pleasant tingles up his legs. “At least we’re not alone in this, right?”

“Right,” Eddie tells him, offering a small smile. “You know, life is sometimes funny that way. I never intended to find a best friend in war, and now I can’t imagine doing this without you anymore, Andrew.”

Andrew’s eyes soften. “Then why don’t you call me Andy?” he asks quietly. “You’ve done it before, you know. But you always go back to Andrew and, quite frankly, it drives me mad. Only my parents call me that.”

Eddie chuckles in amusement. “I never knew you felt so strongly about your name.” He pauses, looking down at the water. “Andy,” he finally says, trying the name out. “I guess it’s about time, huh?”

Andrew huffs out a laugh. “We’ve only spent every free minute of the last year or so together,” he points out. “It’s been ‘about time’ now for quite a while, if you ask me.”

“True,” Eddie agrees. “Though I suppose it’s a bit boring when everyone else already calls you Andy. Maybe I should call you Allison instead? Or Ali for short? Make our friendship a little more special?”

Andrew’s eyes narrow at him. “You do realize that we share that middle name, right?”

“Point taken,” Eddie grins. “Though it would make for a perfect band name: the Allies!”

With a snort, Andrew says, “That’s horrible. And, in case you’ve forgotten, I can neither sing nor play an instrument. Good chance on that band having any success.”

“Then we’ll open a bar instead,” Eddie suggests without pausing to think about it. He playfully flicks some water in Andrew’s direction. “Allison’s, where we have live music every Friday night and the best cooking you can find on the East Coast.”

He grins proudly at Andrew who seems to ponder that for a moment.

“I could get behind that,” Andrew says slowly and a moment later his eyes light up. “We could have a veteran’s special every fourth Sunday in the month where we only serve rice and peaches.”

They look at each other for a moment before they double over in laughter.

“We’d need to add some maggots or it wouldn’t be authentic,” Eddie suggests once he’s caught his breath again.

“Oh, definitely,” Andrew agrees with a grin still pulling at his lips.

Occasionally their feet bump against each other in the water while they resume their breakfast. It’s the most at peace Eddie’s felt since they’ve landed on New Britain at the beginning of January and in moments like this it sometimes scares him how happy Andrew can make him, how much he craves his company, even at four in the morning. He tries not to think about it too much, tries not to worry about the way his heart picks up speed when Andrew smiles at him or how much it aches when Andrew looks tired and hurt. It’s something he hasn’t felt in a very long time, hasn’t allowed himself to feel, really, but somehow Andrew’s wormed his way right into Eddie’s heart and seems determined to stay there. Eddie knows this can only lead to trouble and heartbreak for him, but right now he tells himself that it doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is that Andrew is safe, alive and right next to him, laughing about things that are ridiculous and impossible and just a little bit crazy. Eddie wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, everyone! Just a quick thank you again to everyone who's reading this story! 
> 
> For once I have some news for you. Next Saturday's update will be the last chapter of the New Britain arc. Since it's also the Easter holidays that weekend I've worked on a little something that I'll probably post on Easter Sunday if all goes well as a sort of thank you to the amazing The Pacific fandom. Without giving too much away, I can tell you that the story already has about 8,000 words (and isn't done yet), features pretty much every character from The Pacific but focuses on Andy and Eddie, is set in an alternate universe and, if you guys like it and want to see more, could be expanded into a series that could also include Band of Brothers and Generation Kill characters.


	10. USS Elmore - 04.05.1944

**10\. USS Elmore - 04.05.1944**

New Britain is a tiny speck lost in the morning mist behind them and Eddie is more than glad to put some distance between him and that island. He’s 27 years old now and he’s just spent his first birthday in a combat zone. By some kind of miracle the sun had been shining that day, and with fondness Eddie remembers Andy telling him cheekily that he personally ordered the sunny weather just for the occasion. He smiles at the memory. A sunny day had been just what he and everyone else in their company had needed after weeks of constant rain. Then, in the evening, came the orders to move out, to pack up their gear, and Eddie couldn’t have asked for a better birthday present. Melbourne was calling them and everyone was in high spirits again, more than ready to leave their personal hell of rain, mud and death behind.

“Penny for your thoughts.”

Eddie looks up and finds Andy standing in the door to his cabin. He smiles up at him by way of greeting as Andy makes his way inside and drops down next to Eddie on his bunk bed, needing no invitation. After Andy pulls off his boots he makes himself right at home and gets comfortable next to Eddie, and Eddie wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Just thinking about the last few weeks,” Eddie tells him and stretches his arms out in front of him to work out the kinks in his shoulders.

Beside him, Andy nods. “Not a lot of good memories there,” he remarks with a sigh. “I actually have no idea how many letters I’ll have to write to mothers who will never see their boys again. I just know it’s too many.”

“We’ve lost a lot of good men,” Eddie agrees solemnly. For a moment they are both lost in silent remembrance, each thinking of the men who didn’t make it. Then Eddie says quietly, trying to lighten the mood, “But it wasn’t all bad on New Britain, was it? We had some good moments, too, few and far in between as they were.”

“Such as?” Andy asks him with a raised eyebrow.

A grin tucks at Eddie’s lips. “Such as the time you chewed out your runner because he hitched a ride on a PT boat.”

Andy groans and hides his face in his hands as he remembers that particular incident. “Ugh, don’t remind me. I’m still angry at him for doing that. Of all the stupid things …”

“Still,” Eddie says, smirking, “it provided the rest of the company with some much needed relief. Miller makes the funniest faces when he’s half-scared to death that his C.O. is going to murder him.”

Andrew snorts. “As if I was that scary.”

“Oh, you have no idea how terrifying you can be,” Eddie tells him, amused. “You’re usually so kind and soft-spoken that it’s really rattling when you raise your voice and give someone hell. People immediately know they screwed up and feel awful for disappointing you. And let me tell you, for everyone not involved it’s a lot of fun to watch the poor guy squirm.”

With a shrug, Andy shifts a little closer so that their shoulders touch. “It was his own fault for almost giving me a heart attack,” he grumbles.

“You’re no better, you know?” Eddie casually remarks. “Do you have any idea how worried I was when I realized that you distributed your food rations among the men? You were so thin, Andy. Still are. It’s about time we leave that cursed place behind and get back to Melbourne so I can get some proper food into you.”

“Yeah, about that,” Andy begins reluctantly, not looking Eddie in the eyes. Eddie immediately knows he won’t like what Andy is about to tell him. “We’re not going back to Melbourne.”

Eddie’s eyebrows shoot up. “What do you mean? Of course we’re going back to Melbourne. They can’t send us into another battle in the state we’re in. No one would be that crazy.”

“True,” Andy agrees with a wry smile, “but someone higher up decided that a little island called Pavuvu will be just as good for R&R as Melbourne. It’s part of the Russell Islands, a lot closer than Australia and I’ve been told Seabees have been working on turning it into a rest camp for our troops, though I’m not exactly sure what that means. Point is, we’re not going to Melbourne and there’s nothing we can do about it.”

“Well,” Eddie says, trying not to sound as disappointed by the news as he feels, “that’s real nice then, isn’t it? I suppose we ought to be grateful?”

Andy nods unhappily. “You should have been at the meeting. Everyone was looking like their favorite toy had been taken away.” He sighs and rakes a hand through his hair. “But then again, maybe it’s for the best. We’re continuously advancing in this campaign … perhaps it will be over sooner than we think?” He doesn’t sound exactly hopeful.

“Maybe,” Eddie concedes, knowing that Andy is grasping for straws here and just as devastated by not going back to Melbourne as he is, “but this is certainly not good for morale. Have you told the men yet?”

Andy nods his head dejectedly and Eddie doesn’t envy him the job of crushing all their hopes and dreams with a single sentence. To most of them, Melbourne is heaven, and to take that away after the hell they’ve been through on New Britain is almost sacrilegious. A tiny island in the middle of nowhere no one’s ever heard of sounds too much like another campaign mission instead of a place to rest and recuperate. And even if it’s somewhat habitable, Eddie doubts it will offer similar sightseeing spots as Melbourne – or Australian women, which a lot of the men seem to be more interested in, anyway.

“They didn’t take it well,” Andy says and closes his eyes. “Some of them have girlfriends there, you know? Young Burgin, for example. They were looking forward to seeing them again and now they won’t.” He looks absolutely exhausted and Eddie wishes he could take all his worries away.

“Maybe I can cheer them up a bit,” he suggests, pointing to his guitar that is leaning against the wall. “A good song never fails in that regard.”

“Good luck, then,” is all Andy says drily, not opening his eyes. Something clenches painfully in Eddie’s chest at the sight.

He puts a soothing hand on Andy’s arm. “Why don’t you lay down for a bit? You look like you could use some rest.”

Andy’s eyes open slowly and he blinks blearily up at Eddie. “Sleep sounds nice,” he admits. “Moving, however, does not.”

He struggles to sit up anyway until Eddie puts his hands on his shoulders and pushes him gently, but firmly back down. “Then don’t move. I’ll go up on deck and try to cheer up the boys a bit and make sure no one comes down here to disturb you. How does that sound?”

The soft smile Andy graces him with makes Eddie’s heart beat furiously in his chest. “It sounds wonderful,” Andy sighs. “You sure you don’t mind me using your bunk?”

Eddie chuckles and rolls his eyes. “I’m sure, Andy.” He stands up to allow Andy more room to get comfortable. Once Andy’s settled down Eddie only hesitates a moment before he pulls a thin blanket up and over him.

“You’re a blessing, Eddie,” Andy mumbles before burrowing deeper into the covers. He’s asleep within moments.

Eddie just smiles down at him. He quietly grabs his guitar and closes the door behind him with one last look at Andy’s peaceful sleeping face before he ascends the steps that take him up on deck. What he finds are men that are not only demoralized but downright miserable. Once more a light rain is falling around them and Eddie’s just as tired of being wet as the rest of them. Still, he forces his lips up in a smile and calls out, “Come on, boys, stop with the long faces. Nothing we can do about orders, but a bit of singing always makes a dreary day a little better.”

He starts singing _You are my sunshine_ , not waiting for the inevitable grumbling to start. It’s a simple song, everyone knows it and they can all use a little sunshine in their souls right now, so he thinks it’s pretty fitting. At first he’s singing on his own, feeling a little disheartened standing in the rain on the middle of the deck all alone. But then some of the guys join in and it doesn’t take long until most of them are singing along, and Eddie already feels a little better about the whole situation. He’s not happy per se, but he’s grateful that he can give the men this little respite and Andy the rest he deserves. It’s not much but he hopes it will be enough for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoy the last chapter of the New Britain arc! Next weekend we'll be moving on to Pavuvu.   
> There are some things mentioned in this chapter which are based on real events mentioned in the books of R.V. Burgin and Bill Sloan, like Eddie singing on the ship or Andy's runner Miller hitching a ride on a boat and consequently getting chewed out by Andy for it. Just a little background info, for anyone who's interested. 
> 
> Also, as mentioned in the last chapter, tomorrow I'll upload another Andy/Eddie story as a sort of Easter present to the fandom, so even if any of you don't celebrate Easter this is something you can look forward to =)


	11. Pavuvu - 08.05.1944

**11\. Pavuvu - 08.05.1944**

“It’s raining,” one of Andrew’s Marine grumbles under his breath as he steps onto the beach. “Of course it has to be raining. As if we haven’t seen enough rain by now.”

Andrew silently agrees with him as they take their first steps on Pavuvu, the place where they are supposed to rest and which is nothing like Melbourne. What he sees in front of him doesn’t look at all like a nice tropical island one would like to spend his vacation at as promised by his superiors. All around them are rotting coconuts that make the whole island reek and Andrew can see several rats scurrying around. As far as first impressions go, this one is an utter disappointment.

There are no proper roads so they follow a muddy trail up from the beach to the area they are supposed to stay in. The huts Andrew expects to see turn out to be non-existent. Instead they are told to erect tents on the squishy ground, though no one tells them how exactly they’re supposed to do that. He closes his eyes briefly, counts to ten and tries not to think of Melbourne’s streets and botanical gardens and the little park he and Eddie used to frequent. Pavuvu is everything Melbourne is not and the squelching sounds his boots make with every step remind him more of New Britain than he’s comfortable with.

“Well,” Eddie whispers beside him, “I guess we’ll soon learn how bad morale can really get.”

At least Eddie’s not lost his humor, Andrew thinks wryly.

One look at the pile of tents and cots they’re supposed to assemble makes Andrew want to turn around and head right back to the troop ship they just disembarked from. Their “homes” are completely soaked through. Some of the cots fall apart just by squinting at them, and the tents further down in the pile have so much mold on them that they could be considered their own biosphere. The whole situation is so absurd that Andrew doesn’t know whether he should laugh or cry, but he’s pretty sure he’d like to strangle whoever thought Pavuvu was just as good a resting place as Melbourne, and then throw him out at sea to the sharks.

The solemn eyes of the men looking up at him don’t help, either. He knows they expect him to fix this, but he doesn’t know how. He’s just as frustrated as they are and wants to kick the tents and grumble and curse everything in existence, but he can’t. As their commanding officer it’s his job to keep up morale and to put a positive spin on dire situations. Right now, though, he has no idea what to say.

Before he can come up with some empty words that will mean nothing to the men, Eddie comes to his rescue. “Alright, boys, I know this looks bad and if it were up to Ack-Ack and me we’d all be sleeping in five star hotels in sunny Melbourne tonight. But instead we get moldy tents, squeaky cots, mud and rotting coconuts in large quantities, and there’s nothing we can do about it. You can grumble and complain all day for all I care, but I suggest we make the best of this and start building us a home – or at least a place to live in.”

“The Seabees were supposed to do that,” grumbles one of their Marines in the back.

Eddie just raises an eyebrow at him and Andrew can’t help but admire how level-headed and rational he is in this miserable situation. “Yes, they were,” Eddie agrees, “but they haven’t. We’re Marines, aren’t we? We’re trained to make the best of every situation and that’s exactly what we’re going to do now.” His eyes soften a bit. “I know you’re all tired and I know this isn’t Melbourne, but the sooner we make this place habitable, the better. So, let’s go, boys!”

Slowly and not all that happy about it, the men grab tents and cots and stake claim to their own personal areas of mud. Andrew watches them proudly for a moment before he joins Eddie at the pile of tents.

“Thank you,” he tells him quietly while touching his arm for a short moment. “I had no idea what to say and you found the perfect words.”

Eddie shrugs one shoulder. “It’s nothing. I just know how to get unwilling people motivated, being the oldest of so many siblings.” He rummages through the tents. “This one look good to you, Andy?” Eddie asks him, holding up a tent that is only slightly moldy on one side.

“Perfect,” Andrew replies dryly, and grabs a cot that looks like it can carry his weight for at least one night. “What about you?”

Eddie shrugs. “I’ll bunk with one of the other lieutenants. Or maybe I’ll just string up a hammock somewhere. I’m a bit doubtful about those cots in the mud, especially with all those rats running about.”

He eyes the cot in Andrew’s hand like it is something disgusting and Andrew can’t help but laugh. Together, they find a more or less suitable area to put Andrew’s tent up. It’s not an easy feat to get it stabilized in the mud and in the end they have to use some palm trees to secure it at least somewhat. It’s only then that they realize that there are several holes in the tent.

“Of course, what else,” Andrew mumbles and starts working on fixing the holes. Eddie scrounges up some fabric from one of the tents that is a lost cause and together it only takes them a short while until all the holes are closed. Andrew’s a bit doubtful he’ll stay completely dry that night, but it’s better than nothing. Tired and weary, he sits down on his cot which promptly disappears halfway into the mud.

Eddie looks at him and the cot for a moment before he shakes his head and decides, “I’m placing my hammock in the palm trees next to your tent. That way I can save you from being swallowed by mud in the middle of the night should that cot sink any deeper.”

“Funny,” Andrew says, though he suspects that out of the two of them Eddie will be the one sleeping more comfortably that night.

Stepping out of his tent he can see that the rest of the men are not faring any better. Leaking tents are fixed all around him and he can already see several hammocks between palm trees. Andrew still can’t believe that someone would send Marines to a place like this that doesn’t even have huts, let alone showers, a latrine or electricity, but to send battle-weary men here and have them build the place from scratch is an absolute disgrace.

As if reading his thoughts, Eddie steps up behind him and places a hand on his shoulder that immediately calms and grounds Andrew. “Don’t worry, we’ll make something of this place. It might take a little time and a lot of patience, but we’ll manage.”

Andrew turns to him. “You optimism utterly amazes me, you know that?”

Eddie shrugs. “I don’t know about optimism. I find this place just as hideous as you do. It’s just, I’ve learned to deal with whatever life throws at me. Remember the numerous siblings I mentioned earlier? There’s a minor crisis going on every other day at home and grumbling about it doesn’t make it go away. You just have to grin and bear it.”

He grins as if to prove his point and Andrew shakes his head. “Even when it’s a miserable small island full of stinking coconuts and infested with rats – and are those crabs?”

They are, and of various sizes and colors to top it off. Disgust doesn’t even begin to describe what Andrew is feeling in that moment.

Eddie just keeps grinning. “Especially when it’s islands filled with rats and crabs. Want to bet how long it takes for the guys to use them for target practice?”

Andrew finds himself laughing for the second time that day. “How do you do that?” he asks Eddie. “This place is as miserable as it gets and could only be worse if there were Japs here shooting at us, and yet you manage to make me laugh and feel not so bad about all this.”

“Well,” Eddie says, squeezing his shoulder and sending a warm tingling all through Andrew’s body, “my Grandma always said a day is only lost if you find nothing to laugh or smile about. She’s very wise, my Grandma.”

“She sure is,” Andrew agrees. He reaches up to squeeze Eddie’s hand quickly. “Come on, let’s get your hammock up and commandeer another cot in case you change your mind in the middle of the night.”

Later with dusk and soon after night settling over Pavuvu, Andrew watches in fascination as Eddie, Gunny Haney and several other seasoned Marines rig up lamps from empty bottles and gasoline to shed some light since they have no electricity. He’s fortunate that Eddie makes him one, too, because he’s pretty sure he would have burned his tent down if he’d tried it on his own. Other Marines aren’t that lucky. Andrew can hear several small explosions all around the camp area and some tents are already burning.

Eddie watches the unplanned bonfires from his hammock. “At least now we’ll have some funny stories to tell the folks at home,” he remarks dryly.

“Oh yes,” Andrew agrees. “The Battle of Pavuvu will forever be remembered as the time several thousand exhausted Marines were dropped on an island in the middle of nowhere with just as much rats and crabs as company.” He halfheartedly kicks at a crab that tries to scuttle closer to him. “I’m beginning to think I should get my own hammock up,” he adds disgustingly as two rats chase each other around his feet just a moment later.

Eddie chuckles and in the dim light of the makeshift lamp Andrew can see that his eyes are closed and that Eddie is already half asleep. “We can share when it gets too bad. Wouldn’t want the rats and crabs to eat you alive,” he mumbles quietly.

Andrew contemplates that, not even wondering why a proposition like that feels natural and not odd at all. “I’ll try my luck with my cot first. Would be a shame not to use it after we’ve spent all day trying to stabilize that tent.”

Eddie just mumbles something that Andrew can’t understand and he takes this as his cue to go to bed as well. The moment he lies down on his cot it sinks even further down in the mud and the rats and crabs are a lot closer to his face than he’s comfortable with. With a sigh he closes his eyes and tries not to think of Eddie’s warm body just a few feet away, or the possibility of curling up together in a hammock for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the Pavuvu arc where everything is decidedly not like Melbourne. Poor guys. Again I've taken some inspiration from Burgin's and Sloan's books. When King Company arrived on Pavuvu they had nothing. No electricity, no huts, no running water. Some Marines rigged up some lamps, while others accidentally built molotov cocktails instead. 
> 
> As someone mentioned in the comments we've now reached the part where this story crosses over with The Sound of Voices Two, the first story in this series. Some chapters will have completely new scenes, others will show us scenes from the first story, but from Andy's or Eddie's perspective. 
> 
> On another, Band of Brothers related note, I'm going to meet Andrew Scott this weekend at MagicCon in Germany! I'm so excited! =)


	12. Pavuvu - 07.06.1944

**Chapter 12: Pavuvu - 07.06.1944**

It had taken some time, but living conditions on Pavuvu had indeed improved over the last month. Coral was crushed by work details to build roads and Marines scrounged up any wood they could find to build somewhat solid floors for their tents to keep their cots from sinking into the mud. Several work details were sent out every day to clear away the rotting coconuts from the old plantations so that the smell of the place improved vastly.

‘If only we could also get rid of the rats and crabs,’ Andrew thinks to himself as he makes his way from battalion headquarters back to his tent. Eddie had been right about the men using the animals for target practice. Some even performed maneuvers set to destroy the populations on the island – with little to no success. By now they’ve all learned to live with the furry and crusty little buggers, even though it’s hard to admit defeat.

At least the rain that hits the island once every day is good for something. They still don’t have running water and the rain gives them the opportunity to shower and get clean. It’s a funny sight to see some men, Gunny Haney among them, pulling off their clothes in the middle of the street the moment the skies open up. Others are a little more discreet, although modesty doesn’t really have a place in the Marine Corps anyway.

When he reaches his tent he finds Eddie sitting on the chair that Andrew got together with a small table a couple of days ago so he could write his reports on their various missions on New Britain. Eddie has his guitar in his lap and is quietly strumming the strings, playing no particular melody but still creating something beautiful and soothing all the same. He abruptly stops playing when he sees Andrew enter.

“Don’t stop on my account,” Andrew tells him.

With a small smile, Eddie’s fingers start to move again across the strings. “How was your meeting?”

Andrew sits down on his cot with a sigh and rummages through his pockets until he finds the small box he’s looking for. “I got this,” he says by way of explanation, a little embarrassed, and opens the box before holding it up so Eddie can see what’s inside.

Eddie’s eyes grow wide and a huge smile spreads across his face that makes Andrew’s cheeks flush. “A Silver Star? Andy, that’s amazing! I told you you’d get the proper recognition for Cape Gloucester, didn’t I?” His smile softens. “I’m really happy for you.”

Andrew has to look away at that. It’s not that he doesn’t like praise, but in this case he’s not sure at all he’s earned it and it makes him uncomfortable. “I still don’t think this is really necessary,” he mumbles, closing the box and putting the medal away.

“I know,” Eddie says quietly, “but you know you deserve it, right? You really did a lot of good that night on Gloucester.”

Eddie’s right, of course. But they still lost a lot of men that night and it doesn’t really sit right with Andrew to be rewarded when he could – no, should have done better.

“Maybe,” he concedes finally after being quiet for so long that Eddie starts looking worried. “But doing ‘a lot of good’ and doing enough are not really the same thing, are they?”

“Oh Andy,” Eddie says softly. He puts his guitar away and against his will Andrew’s heart speeds up a little when Eddie sits down next to him and takes his hands in his. “It’s not your fault that people died,” he tells Andrew. His thumbs are stroking reassuringly across the backs of Andrew’s hands, warm and gentle. “That’s not on you. You can’t save everyone, not in war. All we can do is make sure we make the best decisions possible in awful situations and try our very hardest to get the men through the campaign. And you’re good at that, Andy. Very good, actually.”

Eddie squeezes his hands until Andrew looks up at him. The way Eddie gazes at him is breathtaking. “I know you don’t believe it, but I do: you are more than good enough for this company, Andy. The men look up to you. They respect you and wouldn’t want anyone else as their captain. Just ask any of them and they will tell you just that.”

Andrew chuckles, already feeling a little better. “That would be embarrassing, asking around and fishing for compliments, wouldn’t it?”

“Then trust me?” Eddie asks simply. “You know I wouldn’t lie to you.”

Andrew holds Eddie’s gaze for a moment. He sees sincerity there and some deeper affection that he’s too afraid to name. Eddie’s the best thing that’s happened to him in a long time and he hopes with all his heart that Eddie will never stop looking at him like that.

“Why don’t you keep it?” he says finally, disentangling one of his hands from Eddie’s and reaching blindly for the box with the Silver Star. “Hold onto it for me until I’ve made my peace with New Britain and don’t feel like throwing up every time I see that box?”

He places the box in Eddie’s hand and gently closes Eddie’s fingers around it. Eddie stares down at it for a moment before he nods. “I think I can do that.”

“Good,” Andrew smiles at him, and it’s an honest one because for the first time since he’s been handed the medal he feels like himself again.

For a moment, neither of them moves or knows what to say. Andrew loves this closeness that they have where sharing the same space and sitting next to each other is enough for both of them and words are not really needed. It takes them a while to break the silence and they don’t mind.

“Did you get any information on the recent scuttlebutt that’s going around at Battalion HQ?” Eddie asks, and Andrew is acutely aware of the fact that Eddie still has not let go of his hand.

Andrew nods. “It’s true,” he says with a heavy sigh. “From what they told us Army infantry and paratroops landed in Normandy yesterday. The war in Europe is in full swing now and we can only pray that our boys over there have an easier and quicker road ahead of them than we have.”

“Amen to that,” Eddie agrees. “At least the Germans respect the Geneva Conventions,” he adds bitterly. “I doubt they’ll fight to the death like the Japs do. The boys in Europe are fortunate in that regard, if nothing else. I wouldn’t be surprised if the war over there is over before ours is done.”

“You’re probably right,” Andrew says. “I don’t see us changing our strategy of island hopping anytime soon and who knows how many little unknown specks of land lie between us and the Japanese home islands.”

Eddie shrugs. “Too many for my liking.”

A thought strikes Andrew and he looks at Eddie in worry. “Are any of your siblings in Europe?”

Eddie shakes his head. “The boys are too young to fight, much to their regret, and the oldest of my sisters work in factories back home. I think it’s hard enough for Mama that I’m over here fighting. She made sure that my sisters didn’t become nurses or Red Cross workers.”

“That’s good,” Andrew says, feeling as relieved as if they were talking about his own family.

“It’s been over three years now since I’ve last seen them,” Eddie remarks quietly. There’s a frown on his face that Andrew desperately wants to wipe away.

Instead he squeezes Eddie’s hand that he still holds. “That’s a long time,” he says softly, trying to offer silent support through touch.

“A lifetime, really,” Eddie contemplates. “My youngest sister Jeannie was two when I left. She won’t remember me at all.” He sighs and then visibly tries to force a smile on his face and put those thoughts away. Andrew admires him for that selflessness. “But I remember her and that’s what’s important until I see her again.”

“Tell me about her?” Andrew asks. He wants to see Eddie’s genuine smile again and getting him to share stories about his family is a sure way to make Eddie happy.

They spend the rest of the afternoon talking about Jeannie’s first smile, her bubbly laugh, the first baby steps she took and the stubborn way in which she refused to speak anything except, “yes”. Eddie’s eyes are twinkling in the lamp light and Andrew can just imagine him with a little baby in his arms, looking at her with adoration and love and singing her song after song to get her to sleep. He hasn’t felt that much at home since he joined the Marines than right here, right now in this tent, sitting next to Eddie on his cot and loosely holding his hand. A peace settles over him that makes him wish that this moment would never end, that he would spend every day for the rest of his life like this. Thoughts like that usually scare him, but now he just lets that feeling wash over him and revels in it, and in the way Eddie’s eyes crinkle around the edges when he smiles.

The ground-shattering realization that he loves Eddie, that Eddie means the world to him, comes quietly and suddenly and Andrew simply embraces it while Eddie keeps on talking about his experiences in knitting little socks for baby feet. It’s surreal and Andrew knows he really should be panicking and putting as much distance between him and Eddie, possibly transferring Eddie to another unit. He knows he won’t, though, because there’s no way he can do this without Eddie by his side. And if this leads to heartbreak for him, then he’ll gladly accept that because Eddie is worth it, with his impossible blue eyes and quirky smile and talented hands. It’s like he’s seeing Eddie in a whole new light and instead of being shocked or frightened by it Andrew just feels relieved that he can finally put a word to what he feels for Eddie.

It’s love, pure and simple, and it feels right. He squeezes Eddie’s hand and when Eddie smiles at him Andrew’s sure there will never be anyone else but Eddie for him. He has no idea if Eddie feels the same, but right now that doesn’t matter. What matters is that he’s here and that Eddie’s here and that they’re here together. He’ll worry about the rest tomorrow.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update, guys! My godson's third birthday was yesterday and I spent the weekend with him and his family and didn't manage to get the chapter up in advance. Coincidentally, in this chapter the part about Jeannie not really saying anything except "yes" was inspired by my godson who is quite stubborn about speaking in general. ;-)  
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter and Andy's revelation at the end. The next chapter will be up on Saturday.


	13. Pavuvu - 04.07.1944

**13\. Pavuvu - 04.07.1944**

“Evening, boys,” Andrew greets the small group of young Marines that is sitting on their cots in their hut trying to escape the heat. “Burgin, a word, please?”

The others shoot Burgin curious glances as he makes his way out of the hut. Andrew waits until they are a few feet away to tell him, “Congratulations, Corporal. You are going on a two week work detail to Banika.”

It’s hard to hide his smile when Burgin’s jaw goes slack in incomprehension. “Banika? Me?”

Andrew nods, amused. “Banika. You. And a couple of others, actually. You think you’re up for guarding a warehouse? I’m told it’s a very important and serious job.”

A grin breaks out on Burgin’s face. “I always take my job seriously, sir,” he says, trying to keep his voice properly somber.

“Then pack your gear,” Andrew tells him. “You ride’s leaving in two hours.”

Burgin salutes and turns to go when Andrew adds, “And Burgin? Have fun.”

“Will do, sir. Thank you!”

Andrew lets him go back to his hut and finally allows himself to smile. Being the bearer of good news is a nice change of scenery to all the sad letters he has to write home to families who will never see their sons again. It feels good to be able to do something nice for his men, even if it’s not much and he can’t do it for all of them. He spent the better part of the last two weeks trying to get this work detail which is more about relaxation than actual work, anyway, for his men. In the end, he got permission to pick ten men to go. Choosing ten men when every single member of his company deserves a break was hard except for one case.

“There you are, Eddie,” he smiles in greeting when he spots Eddie lounging in his hammock with his guitar in his lap.

“Been here for a while,” Eddie says casually, plucking some notes from the strings. “Were you looking for me?”

Andrew nods and nudges the hammock gently so that it starts swaying. “I was, actually. I’ve got a surprise for you.”

Eddie’s left eyebrow rises and he stops playing. “A surprise? As far as I know it’s not my birthday,” he remarks with a curious expression. “That was two months ago.”

Andrew rolls his eyes. “Since when do I need an occasion to do something nice for my best friend? Anyway,” he says, “I’ve managed to get you a nice place on a boat that’s heading to Banika in two hours.”

“What?” Eddie asks, looking shocked. He swings his feet over the side of the hammock and stands up. “How did you do that? Getting to Banika when you’re not sick is almost as hard as invading the Japanese home islands.”

“I have my ways,” Andrew tells him, smiling mysteriously. When Eddie gives him a look he adds, “Alright, I called in some favors but that doesn’t really matter because you and some others will have a nice two weeks on Banika while being on a ‘work detail’ that I’m told includes guarding some beer and only lasts four hours a day with 96 hours off afterwards.” He grins. “You’ll be in heaven for two weeks.”

Instead of a smile a slight frown clouds Eddie’s features. “You’re not coming with us? If anyone deserves a break it’s you.”

Andrew sighs. Trust Eddie to put Andrew first. “I can’t,” he explains. “Too much work to do and do you really think they would let company commanders leave for two weeks when there’s all these new replacements to train? Not a chance, Eddie. Now, can you please smile and jump around in joy at the news? Or at least pretend to be happy?”

Eddie doesn’t jump, but he chuckles and shakes his head fondly and Andrew takes what he can get. “How am I supposed to help you when I’m not here?”

“You’re not,” Andrew tells him pointedly. “That’s the point. You’re taking a break and will make the most of it. Maybe you can smuggle some of those beers you’re supposed to be guarding back with you in two weeks and we can have a nice relaxed evening on our own, then.”

“Is that an order, sir?” Eddie asks cheekily.

Andrew grins at him. “Take it as you will.”

“Well,” Eddie says, “I’ll do my very best, then.” He pauses and glances away for a moment. When he looks back at Andrew his eyes are soft and Andrew briefly forgets how to breathe. “Thank you, Andy. I really do appreciate what you’re doing. Just, promise me something? Don’t overwork yourself. God knows you have a tendency for it.”

Andrew nods. “I’ll try my best,” he says sincerely.

“I’ve seen your best,” Eddie points out in an unimpressed tone. “Try harder.”

Andrew can’t help but laugh and nudges Eddie’s shoulder with his. “I promise I won’t forget to eat or sleep and will leave my desk regularly for walks on the beach. Happy?”

“I’d rather have you with me on Banika, but yes, that will have to do,” Eddie grudgingly agrees.

“I’ll miss you, too,” Andrew says and at the same moment realizes that it’s true. It’s the first time since they met in Melbourne that they’ll be apart for more than a day or two. He’s going to miss sitting together with Eddie in the evening and watching him play his guitar, or waking up in the morning to find Eddie already up and about and looking perfectly groomed in his uniform despite the heat.

A gentle hand on his arm pulls him out of his thoughts. Eddie’s looking at him with soft blue eyes. “Want to go for one last stroll on the beach?”

Andrew wants nothing more than that but instead finds himself saying, “You really should pack, Eddie.”

Eddie just waves a hand dismissively. “I need five minutes to pack my gear, not two hours. Come on, Andy, let’s go. I’ll even bring my guitar.”

He grins at Andrew and how can he resist?

“Alright, then. Let’s go,” he agrees. Then he grins at Eddie. “Race you to the beach!”

With that he’s off like a mad man. Behind him, Eddie is cursing and fumbling to get his guitar on his back while trying to keep up. They must make quite a sight, the two of them running through the bivouac area, but Andrew doesn’t care. It feels great to live a little and he’s going to make the most of the two hours he gets to spend with Eddie.    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm back on regular update time. Thanks to everyone who commented and left kudos for the last chapter. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well.


	14. Pavuvu - Mid-July 1944

**14\. Pavuvu - Mid-July 1944**

When he sees Eddie stumbling ashore after his two week vacation on Banika Andrew isn’t sure whether he should be amused or appalled by what he sees. He’s a little bit of both, he thinks, when Eddie makes his way to him on rather unsteady feet, because he knows that, normally, Eddie isn’t one for drinking mindlessly just because he can, and certainly not to the point where he can barely walk in a straight line the day after. Eddie is the kind of guy who prefers to stick to water or coffee when a bottle of alcohol makes the rounds. It makes the sight of him still slightly drunk and definitely hung over even more peculiar and a little worrisome.

“You know,” Andrew tells him quietly while they make their way slowly up the beach and to Andrew’s tent, “I actually thought you would be the voice of reason over there and prevent the rest of the boys from getting drunk out of their minds for two weeks straight. Guess you never know, huh?”

Eddie’s head hangs low in shame. “I’m sorry,” he says, words slightly slurred, and it takes Andrew a moment to realize that Eddie thinks he’s angry with him.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” he tells Eddie softly and clasps his shoulder in a comforting manner. “It’s just a side of you I’ve never seen before because you don’t make getting drunk a habit.”

Eddie shrugs slightly, still looking dejectedly at his feet. “I don’t really care for the hangover part,” he explains.

“I don’t think anyone does,” Andrew remarks with a laugh.

They reach his tent and Andrew guides Eddie inside and sits down next to him on the cot. Handing him a cup of water, he gently orders, “Drink this. You’ll feel better.”

“Thank you,” Eddie says after he’s drained the cup. “The shade in here is nice, too.”

Andrew chuckles at Eddie’s obvious discomfort. “I bet it is,” he says. “Do you want to lie down for a while?”

Eddie nods, and with a hand on his shoulder Andrew guides him down. He pulls the thin blanket up over Eddie’s hips and pets his arm gently. “Get some sleep. I’ll wake you when it’s time for chow.”

Eddie groans. “I don’t think I can stomach whatever they scrounged up in the mess tent this time.”

Andrew tries not to smile. “We’ll see.”

It doesn’t take long for Eddie’s eyes to close and his breathing to even out. He’s clearly exhausted after days of too much booze and too little sleep and Andrew doesn’t begrudge him his rest. He busies himself with paperwork at his desk and every now and then looks to his left to find Eddie still fast asleep. Having him back by his side makes something unclench inside Andrew and he feels like he can finally breathe again. Without Eddie around he’s felt more than a little unbalanced these last two weeks. More than once he’s caught himself turning around and expecting to see Eddie just a step behind him before remembering he’s not there. It had been rather unnerving. The days dragged on and on and at one point Andrew had to admit to himself that he doesn’t function as well without Eddie as he does when Eddie’s by his side. He needs Eddie. It’s as simple as that. He needs Eddie, and not just in a professional way as his second in command, but personally as well.

With Eddie gone Andrew’s slowly become aware of just how much time they spend together every day, of how much space Eddie really occupies in his head. He’s become aware of just how much he misses Eddie, and of the problem that presents. Realizing you’re in love with your best friend is one thing, but coming to the conclusion that you can’t and don’t want to spend another day without him is quite another. Andrew has no idea how he’ll manage should something happen to Eddie when they’re back in the thick of things, but he knows that he can’t allow his personal feelings to interfere with the job he has to do. Just because Eddie is precious to him doesn’t mean he can keep him from all the dangers in the world, no matter how much he wants to.

To Andrew’s left Eddie’s sleeping face is peaceful with all the fine worry lines smoothed out and Andrew finds himself falling in love with Eddie even more now that he finally has him back. It makes it all the harder to put a lid on his feelings for the sake of his company. With some effort he tears his eyes away from Eddie and shakes his head to clear his thoughts so he can focus on his work. Somehow, Andrew gets through more paperwork with Eddie’s soft breaths as background noise in a few hours than he has in the last few days. He only realizes how much time has passed when the change in Eddie’s breathing pattern makes him look up to find that dust is settling over Pavuvu. He stretches his arms above his head and turns to see Eddie looking at him.

“What happened to chow?” Eddie asks, looking sleepy and a little rumpled but at the same time a lot more alert than earlier that day.

“I thought you didn’t want anything?” Andrew reminds him with a grin.

Eddie rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “I changed my mind.” He squints up at Andrew. “You forgot to wake me, didn’t you?”

“I lost track of time,” Andrew admits truthfully.

There’s no way they’re getting anything in the mess tent now, so Andrew stands up and rummages through his locker. After a moment, he triumphantly holds up a couple of chocolate bars.

“I saved these for a special occasion,” he explains to Eddie. “I guess having you back by my side counts. Come on, scoot over, and I’ll share some.”

Once Eddie’s made room Andrew sits down next to him, their legs pressing together, and hands him a chocolate bar.

“Thanks,” Eddie says. He tears away the wrapper and takes a careful bite. The sound he makes nearly causes Andrew’s face to flush and his thoughts to wander to forbidden places.

“That good, huh?” Andrew can’t help but ask, trying hard not to stare.

Eddie nods. “I can’t even remember the last time I’ve had chocolate. This tastes heavenly.”

Andrew nods, remembering that Eddie hoards his issued chocolate bars to send them home to his brothers and sisters and hasn’t kept any for himself for as long as Andrew has known him. Smiling softly, he hands him another bar.

They sit in comfortable silence until all the chocolate is gone. It’s getting darker around them and Andrew knows he should turn on the light but he’s too tired and content right now to bother with getting up. He can still make out Eddie’s face next to him and Eddie’s blue eyes lock onto his. They share a small smile and Andrew can’t believe he’s managed to live through two weeks without moments like this.

“I’ve missed you, you know?” Eddie says quietly, voicing Andrew’s own thoughts. “Every day for the last two weeks I’ve missed you. Banika is all well and good but I found it hard to have a good time when I knew you were over here, needing a break just as much if not more than we did and not getting it.”

Andrew shrugs lightly. “A lot of men didn’t get a chance to go to Banika.”

Eddie’s gaze is full of unspoken emotions as he holds his. “But I don’t care about any of them the way I do about you.”

The words, spoken in a whisper and so unexpected, send a shiver down Andrew’s spine and take his breath away. They make him feel warm all over and his heart beat faster in his chest because suddenly all the dreams about the both of them he didn’t dare to have don’t seem so impossible anymore.

“Eddie …” he starts to say and stops, not knowing how to go on. No matter how he feels, how Eddie feels, this is dangerous ground and they both know it.

Next to him Eddie looks like a deer caught in the headlights, clearly surprised by his own bravado. Then Eddie lowers his eyes and makes himself small, and Andrew has the distinct feeling that he did something wrong, that he waited too long to say something.  

“I know it’s inappropriate,” Eddie whispers without looking at him. His gaze is focused on his hands. “And I understand if you want to send me away.” He pauses and his eyes meet Andrew’s fearfully for just a moment. “Or if you want to court-martial me,” he adds. “I just … I did a lot of thinking on Banika and I realized something.”

Eddie reaches towards him and Andrew can only look down when Eddie’s shaking hands carefully clasp his.

“You mean the world to me, Andy,” Eddie says and Andrew’s eyes flick back up. “You’re … everything. I don’t know how it happened or why and I can’t even remember the last time I felt this way about someone. And there on Banika, seeing all those men that have been broken by the war one way or another, I just knew I needed to tell you, had to take the chance. Because this could be us one day, you know? Broken or, or even worse. The next battle is not far off and anything can happen then and I … I didn’t want to leave it until it was too late, you know? You deserve to know the truth.”

Andrew can clearly hear the desperation in Eddie’s voice and knows without a doubt that Eddie means every word he’s said. Warmth and happiness fill him and spread through every fiber of his being. ‘Eddie feels the same,’ is all he can think about and despite all the problems and dangers that he knows come with that revelation for a moment he just feels ridiculously happy.

But before he can say anything Eddie goes on, so quietly that it breaks Andrew’s heart, “I know this is wrong and-“

“No,” Andrew says firmly, finally finding his voice. Eddie’s blue eyes look up at him, wide with shock and fear. Andrew’s eyes soften and he smiles slightly. “It’s not wrong. I know a lot of people think like that but I’m not one of them. Caring about someone can never be wrong, Eddie - especially when they feel the same.”

Next to him Eddie goes completely still and just stares at him with wide eyes. Now Andrew wishes he’d switched on the lamp earlier if only to be able to see Eddie’s expression more clearly.

“I think I’m still drunk,” Eddie finally says, voice full of disbelief. “Or dreaming.”

Andrew can’t help it, he laughs. The tension in the air between them dissipates like morning fog in the rising sun. “You might still be a little drunk, though I seriously doubt it, but you’re definitely not sleeping, Eddie. This is real.”

As if to proof his point Andrew disentangles one of his hands from Eddie’s and places it gently on Eddie’s cheek. He is delighted when Eddie’s eyes flutter close for a moment. When they open again there is some indiscernible emotion in Eddie’s gaze and Andrew only has a second to react before Eddie leans forward.

“No,” he tells Eddie quietly before their lips connect. Gently but firmly he pushes him back. At first Eddie looks terribly hurt, but then his expression changes and he looks confused and so lost that Andrew hates himself for putting that look on his face.

“But you said … I thought …?” Eddie mumbles, shrinking in on himself and putting some distance between him and Andrew. His eyes widen in realization. “Oh god, I got this wrong.”

Before Eddie can panic any more Andrew moves closer and intertwines their hands once more. He lifts them up to his face and presses a gentle kiss to them, hoping to reassure Eddie. “You didn’t get it wrong, Eddie, I promise you.”

Now Eddie just looks confused. “But … why did you …?”

Andrew sighs. “We can’t do this, Eddie. Not here, not now. It’s too dangerous. We’re always surrounded by people. Someone could walk in on us. Or we could get carried away and arouse suspicion. Maybe, if we were in Melbourne …” He shakes his head. “But we’re not in Melbourne. There is no privacy on Pavuvu. I’m not going to risk our careers and our lives for a little indulgence.”

“But surely one small kiss won’t hurt?” Eddie asks quietly.

Andrew smiles at him a little sadly, hating himself for having to be the voice of reason. “But one small kiss would surely lead to another and then another … I’m not sure I could stop after one,” he admits with a small smile. “We’re practically always on the job here, Eddie. Other men’s lives depend on us and I can’t have my judgment clouded by my feelings for you. That’s why nothing can change between us, not yet anyway. I’m so sorry.”

And he is. There is nothing he wants more than to gather Eddie in his arms, kiss him breathless and never let him go again. But he has to be professional about this. He simply can’t afford it to put Eddie first, not when they’re in combat. It wouldn’t be fair to the rest of the men.

“You don’t need to apologize,” Eddie tells him quietly when he finally meets Andrew’s eyes again. “You’re right, of course. I wouldn’t want to stop after one kiss either.” His smile is warm as he says this. A little more seriously he adds, “And as much as I don’t like it you’re right about the rest as well. We need to stay focused on our job. The boys depend on it.” He pauses, trying to gather his thoughts. When he looks back at Andrew his blue eyes are big and earnest, if a little sad. “You already gave me more than I ever thought I’d get. Just knowing you feel the same, knowing I’m not alone - I can’t even begin to tell you how happy that makes me. Everything else can wait until all this is over.”

Eddie’s lips quirk up in a little smile that is full of understanding and love. Andrew can’t believe he’s never seen it before, the adoration in Eddie’s gaze whenever he looks at him or the fondness in his eyes. He wonders how long Eddie’s been feeling like this and for a moment he is tempted to ask him but then he decides it can wait. It’s not important right now.

He presses another kiss to Eddie’s hands just because he can. “Thank you,” he whispers against lean fingers. “I know this is not easy and that I’m asking a lot.”

“We’ll manage,” Eddie reassures him. His thumb carefully, almost reverently, brushes across the back of Andrew’s hand. “This is nice.”

“It is,” Andrew agrees, mesmerized by the movement and the way his hand tingles where Eddie’s touching it. A thought strikes him. “Maybe we should think about what we can do instead of what we can’t?” he muses.

Next to him, Eddie looks intrigued. “Oh? What did you have in mind?”

Andrew smiles at him. “Would you care to join me some day at sunrise for breakfast on the beach?”

Eddie’s whole face lights up and Andrew wishes he could capture this moment with a camera. “I wouldn’t mind spending _every_ morning with you,” he says earnestly.

“Then we have a date,” Andrew declares and they share a smile full of unspoken promises.

He knows it’s not much. Eddie deserves more than a meager breakfast of rations in a warzone in the dead of night. But it’s all he can manage right now. A short hour before everyone is up where they can pretend that everything is fine and enjoy each other’s company is better than nothing, after all, and it has to be enough for now..

Eddie, for his part, looks like Andrew just offered him all the stars in the sky and that’s all Andrew needs to allow himself to stop worrying and just enjoy this moment that has turned his life upside down in all the right ways. He smiles at Eddie and hopes this moment never ends. It feels a little bit like coming home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter hasn't been easy. I'm not really good at writing love confessions and this one was twice as hard because of course things can't go smoothly. To me, Andy and Eddie always seemed like the kind of people who put the job first and everything else second, so while they love each other they would never act on these feelings as long as they're responsible for people's life. I hope this came across somewhat since this is an important theme in this story and also in the sequel that is already planned XD


	15. Pavuvu - Early August 1944

**15\. Pavuvu - Early August 1944**

It takes them almost two weeks to go on their first date, much to Andrew’s shame. He didn’t mean to leave it for so long but things kept getting in the way. An early morning run with the company here, some shooting exercises there and more than once Andrew simply overslept because he’d been running himself ragged trying to get his company ready for combat somehow. Command had made it clear that their next battle wasn’t far off and Andrew was trying his hardest to prepare his men. In his heart, though, he knew that for some of them it will never be enough, no matter how much they trained.

With everything happening and the whole island preparing for war Andrew barely had any time for Eddie. While he made sure that they had at least lunch or dinner together every day, he knew it wasn’t enough. He always felt awful when he had to turn one of Eddie’s offers to spend some time together down. Eddie never complained, though. He would smile a little sadly, pat Andrew on the shoulder and leave him to his work with a quiet, “Maybe tomorrow.” It broke Andrew’s heart every time.

He was so tired of having to disappoint Eddie. There was already so little he could give him and he was determined to keep his promise of a romantic breakfast on the beach. So he started planning and while it took some time to get everything organized, in the end he finally manages it early in August.

It’s pitch black when Andrew wakes up that morning. Multitudes of stars are twinkling above Pavuvu as he dresses himself quietly and grabs the bag he prepared yesterday. In exchange for a bottle of rum Andrew had acquired during a sports match a couple of days ago the cook let him into the mess tent yesterday evening so Andrew could grab some bread, butter and cheese. Andrew still remembers the incredulous look on the cook’s face when he’d made his offer. The cook thought he got the better end of the deal but Andrew knows better. A bottle of rum is nothing compared to making Eddie happy and smiling at him.

Eddie is still asleep when Andrew steps quietly into his tent. He is wrapped up to his chin in one of the issued blankets that never fail to remind Andrew of his father. Only Eddie’s left foot peeks out from under the blanket and, with a mischievous smile on his face, Andrew very lightly runs his finger along the underside of Eddie’s toes.

At first, Eddie only twitches slightly, so Andrew does it again. It’s not long until Eddie starts grumbling and pulls his foot under the blanket and curls himself into a ball. Andrew laughs quietly and sits down next to him on the cot.

“Come on, Eddie, wake up. Time for breakfast,” he whispers into Eddie’s ear.

Eddie pulls his blanket higher and mumbles, “Go away …”

Andrew snorts and, in one cruel motion, pulls the blanket away. Eddie’s awake in an instant.

“Hey! Why -,“ he stops abruptly when he sees Andrew grinning down at him.

“Do you want to go have breakfast with me on the beach or not?” Andrew asks him, trying very hard not to let Eddie’s mussed up curls distract him.

Eddie blinks up at him, looking confused. “Of course I do …” He takes a look at his watch. “But, Andy, it’s not even four in the morning!”

Andrew shrugs. “I couldn’t manage it later. There’s still that maneuver we have to do with I Company at six am.”

Eddie groans. “I forgot about that.”

“See?” Andrew says. ”That’s why I’m the captain. I remember that kind of stuff.”

Eddie just throws his pillow at him. “Oh, stop it.”

With a sigh he stands up and stretches his arms above his head with a yawn. Andrew tries not to stare as Eddie changes into a fresh shirt and pulls on some trousers, but he can’t help it. Eddie’s body still shows a number of signs of the bad treatment it got on New Britain. He’s far too thin in Andrew’s opinion and it worries him because it won’t be long until they’re back in combat again and Eddie looks like he can’t afford to lose another pound.

“Like what you see?” Eddie asks with a bashful smile before he pulls off his socks, deciding to go barefoot like Andrew.

“Actually, no,” Andrew tells him honestly and Eddie stops in his movements to look up at him with a frown. “How did you manage not to gain a single pound since we’ve been here?”

 A little self-consciously, Eddie tugs at the bottom of the white shirt that hangs loosely on his frame. He shrugs. “I’ve always had trouble putting on weight. Just ask my mother. Whenever I was sick as a child it took me weeks to regain the weight I’d lost in just a couple of days. I guess some things never change.”

“Then it’s lucky we’re having our first breakfast now and you’ll get a second one after the maneuvers are done. Don’t even try to argue,” he adds before Eddie can open his mouth. “You’ve been nagging me about proper meals since we’ve known each other. Now it’s my turn.” He softens the words with a smile which Eddie returns with a small nod.

“Point taken,” he acknowledges sheepishly.

“After you,” Andrew says, holding the door open for Eddie.

Together, they make their way quietly through camp and down a trampled trail to the beach. They can barely see the path until Andrew lights up his old makeshift lamp and illuminates their surroundings. The beach before them is dark and empty except for some land crabs and rats that still roam the island despite the many attempts of bored and angry Marines to exterminate them. Andrew ignores them and beckons for Eddie to follow him up the beach. While he’s pretty sure that no one is around at this time of night, it wouldn’t hurt to find a somewhat secluded spot a little bit away from the camp.

Once he’s satisfied that they’re far enough away, he hands Eddie the lamp and spreads out a blanket on the sand. Bread, butter, cheese and knives follow and Eddie watches quietly as Andrew arranges the items. Finally, he takes one last thing from his bag and places it decoratively next to their breakfast.

“A flower, Andy?” Eddie’s amused grin is blinding. “Really?”

Andrew grins back. “Well, I’m a romantic kind of guy, what can I say?”

Eddie shakes his head and sits down. “Where on earth did you find this?” he asks, picking up the flower and taking a closer look at it.

“You just have to venture far enough into the swamp areas …” he trails off when he sees the look on Eddie’s face.

“Please tell me you didn’t risk your life for a flower?”

Andrew laughs. “Don’t worry, I was quite safe. I had young Sledge with me.”

Eddie grimaces. “That doesn’t reassure me at all.”

“Don’t let Sledge hear you say that,” Andrew tells him, still grinning. “He was the one who pointed out the flower to me, actually. We found it while looking for birds.”

Eddie stares at him disbelievingly. “Do I even want to know why you were out in the swamp looking for birds? You don’t even like birds.”

Andrew shrugs. “Sledge does and, well, I kind of may have implied I was interested in ornithology, you know, for bonding purposes? And before I knew it he was talking about some new species he’d seen on one of the training exercises and off we were, with Burgin, Shelton and De L’Eau trailing behind us.”

“Some leader you are,” Eddie says with a fond look as he shakes his head once more. “I’ll thank Sledge later for the flower, then.”

“Hey, at least I handpicked it for you all on my own,” Andrew says with mock indignation.

Eddie’s eyes soften. “Well, if that’s the case … thank you, Andy. It is a very beautiful flower.”

Carefully, he places it back on the blanket and looks at Andrew expectantly. “So, what do we have for breakfast?”

Andrew looks down at his meager offerings. “Not much, I’m afraid. Just what I could scrounge up in the mess tent.”

Eddie’s smile never wavers. “I happen to be very fond of bread and cheese, so let’s start.”

They eat their breakfast quietly next to each other with their shoulders and sometimes their hands brushing when they reach for the cheese at the same time. Andrew thinks he’s never smiled so much in his life. Just having this quiet moment with Eddie by his side makes him happier than anything has in a long time. He used to think it impossible to have a moment of peace in war; now he knows he was wrong. Happiness can be found in all places and he just happened to find his somewhere between Melbourne and Pavuvu in the vastness of the Pacific.

“What are you thinking about?” Eddie’s voice pulls him from his musings.

“Just about how lucky I am,” Andrew tells him.

They finish their breakfast and Andrew turns off the lamp to allow the darkness to reclaim them. Above them the stars are still twinkling in the night sky and beyond the ocean the horizon is tinted a light blue announcing the arrival of the sun.

“It’s beautiful,” Andrew says quietly.

Eddie looks at him and one of the corners of his mouth turns up in a soft half-smile. “Yes, it is,” he agrees and Andrew tries not to blush.

He reaches over and takes one of Eddie’s hands in his. Ahead of them, the sun is slowly rising above the horizon and the waves are rolling gently against the shore at their feet. Andrew knows it won’t be long until they’ll have to crawl ashore on a different beach where every second could be the last. He only wishes that afterwards, both he and Eddie will still be there to enjoy another early morning together while watching the sunrise.

Next to him, Eddie has his eyes closed and enjoys the first rays of the sun on his face. Andrew watches him for a moment until Eddie squeezes his hand as opens his eyes and turns to look at him with a bright smile.

“No one’s ever watched the sunrise with me, not like this,” he tells Andrew quietly. “Thank you, Andy.”

Andrew shrugs his shoulders, feeling a little embarrassed. “I’d do more if I could,” he begins to say, but Eddie stops him.

“I know,” he says. “But I don’t need more. This is perfect. Well worth the wait.”

He squeezes Andrew’s hand once more and just like that Andrew falls a little bit more in love with him. Eddie’s smile is infectious and Andrew finds himself grinning back at him, feeling almost giddy with happiness.

The sun is rising steadily over the horizon and Andrew knows they’ll have to get back soon if they want to make it in time for the planned maneuver, but for now he simply enjoys the feeling of Eddie’s hand in his and the warmth of the sun on his face. And just like that, just for a moment, the world narrows down to the two of them and nothing else matters. He could get used to this, Andrew thinks, vowing to himself not to take another two weeks to take Eddie out for breakfast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, guys! Once more, a heartfelt thank you for all the kudos and comments for this story. I'm so glad you liked the last chapter! Have some fluff this weekend before the story takes us to Peleliu. 
> 
> And yes, there is going to be a sequel to this story at some point. I think I already hinted at it in my notes for the first chapter. While this story will cover Andy and Eddie's experiences in the Pacific, the third story of this trilogy will focus on their return home. They will return to their families, deal with being apart and with everything that happened to them during the war and transition back to civilian life will not be as easy as they thought it would be. That's all I can say for now. Some chapters are already written, but for now I'm focusing on finishing this story here. I'm currently working on chapter 31, so there's not much left and after that I can start focusing on other fic ideas ;-)


	16. LST 661 - 14.09.1944

**16\. LST 661 - 14.09.1944**

The landing practices on Guadalcanal are behind and the ominous shape of Peleliu lies before them. Tomorrow morning they will land on their designated sector of the beach and make their way toward an airfield that they’ve been told is very vital to the campaign. That’s the plan in theory at least. From past experience Eddie knows that things rarely go smoothly or according to plan.

He sighs and closes his eyes briefly. His stomach cramps painfully when he thinks about the days ahead. He’s always worried before a landing, be it for the boys in his company or for his own life. This time it’s different. He’s not just worried anymore, he is downright scared and it’s all because of Andy. Andy’s at the forefront of his mind and Eddie can’t stop thinking about all the horrible ways he could lose him. He sees it every time he closes his eyes and his mind comes up with even worse scenarios when he’s asleep.

“Are you alright?” a voice behind him asks quietly and is almost drowned out by the constant shelling that is going on around them and supposed to make their landing tomorrow easier. Despite the destruction all around, Eddie feels warmth rush through him when he turns around and looks at Andy in the darkness.

“Hey,” he smiles softly. For a moment he just looks at Andy and tries to commit every little detail about this man that he’s so in love with that it hurts sometimes to memory. It hits Eddie that this may be the last time they share a quiet moment and his smile fades.

“Eddie?” Andy asks again and steps closer.

Eddie wants nothing more than to cross the distance between them and hide his face in Andy’s chest to forget about the world for just a moment. Instead he says, “Honestly? I’m as far from alright as I can be right now. I haven’t really been alright since we’ve set foot on this vessel,” he admits quietly.

“Why haven’t you said anything?” Andy asks him, sounding a little hurt. “I could have helped.”

Eddie smiles at him sadly. “You have enough to worry about without me adding to the mix.”

Andy takes that final step and crosses the distance between them. He takes one of Eddie’s hands in his and lets his thumb brush gently over the back of Eddie’s hand. Eddie knows it’s dangerous and that he should put a stop to this right now for both of their sakes but he can’t bring himself to step away. He needs this, and if this is the last time he gets to touch Andy he will take whatever Andy is willing to give.

“But I want to worry about you,” Andy tells him, voice soft. “And I do, constantly. A lot more than I probably should.”

It’s that last admission that finally makes Eddie open up. “I’m scared about tomorrow, a lot more than I’ve been before Guadalcanal or New Britain,” he admits.

“Because of us?” Andy asks.

Eddie nods. “I’m terrified of losing you out there,” he whispers.

Andy’s grip on his hands tightens. “Me, too.”

Eddie looks down at their hands. “I dream about it every night. I think by now I’ve imagined every possible way for you to die on that piece of rock over there. I’ve seen you get shot, blown to bits, taken prisoner and tortured, die of thirst and hunger … and everything in-between.”

“So that’s why you look like you haven’t slept in a week,” Andy observes with a concerned frown. “You actually haven’t.”

Eddie huffs out a broken laugh.

“Oh, Eddie,” Andy murmurs. He pulls at Eddie’s hand and urges him to sit down beside him with their backs against the railing before he puts an arm around Eddie’s shoulder. “I’ve had those dreams about you, too. And it’s so easy to imagine all the ways I could lose you. Do you want to know what I try to do instead?”

Eddie can’t do anything but nod against Andy’s shoulder, savoring the warmth and comfort radiating from Andy’s body.

“I think about everything that I still want to do with you.” Andy’s voice lowers to the faintest whisper and Eddie can hear the smile as he continues. “I think about the first time we will kiss. I think about meeting your parents and all your brothers and sisters and thanking them for always being there for you. I think about taking you on a real date, maybe to the movies?”

“And ice cream afterwards?” Eddie asks. His eyes are closed and he can just imagine the both of them leaving the movie theatre and walking down the streets to the ice cream parlor.

Next to him, Andy chuckles. “And ice cream afterwards. Chocolate for you and vanilla for me.”

Eddie nods with a smile. “Sounds about right.”

“And then we go home and it’s dark so we can hold hands and no one will notice. We go to our flat or little house where we have all the privacy we don’t get to have here.”

“Our house?” Eddie can’t help but ask.

“Sure,” Andy tells him softly. “With a little backyard for the dog.”

Eddie laughs, finally opening his eyes again. “A dog as well?”

He feels Andy’s gaze on him. “Don’t tell me you’re a cat person, Eddie.”

Eddie shrugs and doesn’t lift his head from its place on Andy’s shoulder. “I’m good with all animals. Except land crabs and possibly rats.”

“Don’t worry, we won’t have any of those. Just a dog,” Andy says a little dreamily. Softly, he adds, “Now you know what I think about when the nightmares get too bad.”

Eddie sighs and shuffles a little closer so that he’s completely pressed against Andy’s side. “It sounds like a dream,” he muses. “Almost too good to be true.”

He can feel Andy shake his head. “Not a dream. Just hope, Eddie.”

Hope, Eddie thinks. Hope can be dangerous because it can make you believe in a good outcome and hurt you all the more when things don’t end up well. But the picture Andy paints is nice and for the first time in a long while Eddie sees sunshine and Andy’s smile when he closes his eyes instead of blood and broken limbs. He clings onto that and finally feels the tension he has carried around with him for days leave him.

“Tell me more?” he asks Andy softly.

“What do you want to know?” Andy asks.

Eddie smiles into his shoulder. “Tell me more about our dog? What breed is he? What do we call him?”

Andy’s breath is tickling the shell of his ear as he chuckles. “How about a Border Collie? And he’s a she, by the way. I thought we’d call her Regina. Gina for short?” he suggests.

“Why Regina?” Eddie asks him. It’s not a typical dog name, at least where he’s from.

“It’s Latin and means queen,” he says. “I thought it’d be nice to have a little reminder of our company at home.”

“Why not Rex, then?” Eddie asks.

He feels Andy shaking his head. “Too cliché.”

Eddie laughs quietly. “True. Gina is a lot more subtle that’s for sure.”

He knows Andy’s grinning. “Knew you’d like it. We’ll buy her as a puppy, of course, and I imagine you’ll be the one training her while I spoil her rotten. We’ll take her on long walks in the country and play fetch with her and your family will love her, especially little Jeannie. She’ll always give her treats and …”

Eddie listens while Andy paints their future with Gina the puppy in vivid detail. Andy’s voice is soothing and before he knows it Eddie is drowsing. In the back of his mind a little voice is telling him that they are still up on deck and shouldn’t spend the rest of the night leaning against the railing with constant shelling as their background noise, but his exhaustion gets the better of him and he simply doesn’t care. Having Andy beside him is all he wants right now and despite the sounds of war all around them he feels calm and peaceful.

He falls asleep to the gentle sound of Andy’s voice and dreams of happy laughter and a dog running through a field.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have fun with a little fluff this weekend! I'll be attending a convention next weekend and will try to get the next chapter up on Saturday as usual, but can't promise anything. It may be a couple of days late, just so you know.


	17. Peleliu - 17.09.1944

**17\. Peleliu - 17.09.1944**

Eddie wakes up with a start. A look at his watch tells him it’s barely past midnight. Yesterday they’ve taken the airfield of Peleliu. The day before that they had landed on the island. It feels like a lifetime ago that he crawled up the beach and prayed to every god he knows that Andy would make it. There had been a terrifying hour where Eddie lost sight of Andy in the chaos on the beach. He had enough trouble keeping his platoon somewhat organized during the landing that, just for a moment, he looked away from Andy’s position to his right. When he looked back, Andy was gone and Eddie felt his heart stop.

He hadn’t been able to find Andy immediately and that was more terrifying than the shells and mortars coming down around him. Now, two days later, the incident still haunts him at night. In his dreams he relives the heart-stopping moment of losing sight of Andy on the beach, but it doesn’t stop there. He goes looking for him all over the place, turns dead bodies over until he suddenly stares at Andy’s dirt-streaked face and closed eyes. The sight and the devastating feeling of loss that accompanies it are such a shock that he always wakes up with a start. Just like now.

Shit, he thinks and rubs a hand across his tired eyes. He has a feeling this won’t be the last nightmare he’ll have in combat. He knows how dangerous men agitated by nightmares can be for their company and the last thing he wants is to endanger his men, but there’s nothing he can do but hope that he’ll continue to wake quietly.

Turning around, Eddie pulls the thin blanket higher around his shoulders and tries to fall back asleep. It doesn’t work. Every time he closes his eyes he sees Andy’s still face and when he opens them again the urge to reach out and touch Andy’s wrist to feel his pulse and reassure himself that Andy’s still alive is almost too strong to resist. He tells himself that it’s enough to watch Andy’s chest rise and fall. The rhythmic pattern is soothing and Eddie feels his racing heart finally slow down a little.

He hasn’t had a chance yet to just look at Andy since they came to their … understanding, and he’s unable to tear his eyes away from the peaceful expression on Andy’s face. Even in the darkness Andy is mesmerizing. His hair softly reflects the fires that are burning outside the building they have set up camp in. The worry lines on his forehead are smoothed away by sleep and his lips are slightly parted. His hands rest on top of the blanket that covers him and Eddie wants nothing more than to reach out and never let him go. He wants to clasp Andy’s hands in his and caress them gently with his thumbs. He wants to feel the veins under his fingertips and trace each and every single one all night long. He wants so much and he knows he can’t have any of it. Not yet and maybe never. It is the never he’s afraid of: lost chances and a bitter future.

He’s so lost in his thoughts that he doesn’t notice the change in Andy’s breathing until Andy’s quiet voice says amusedly, “I feel like I’m under surveillance.”

Eddie’s eyes snap up and lock onto Andy’s in the dimness. “Did I wake you?”

Andy shakes his head. “One of the shells did.”

Funny, Eddie thinks. He can’t remember hearing any shells falling.

“You should go back to sleep,” Eddie tells him.

One of Andy’s eyebrows rises. “What about you?”

Eddie shrugs. “Just making sure you’re still with me,” he says as nonchalantly as he can manage.

Andy’s eyes soften and Eddie looks away. It still feels weird being so open about his feelings but words are the only thing they have and Andy deserves the truth. There’s no hiding from him anyway.

When Andy’s hand reaches out to cross the distance between them Eddie grasps it gladly. “I can assure you I’m still here, Eddie,” Andy says quietly. “We’ve made it one more day.”

“We did,” Eddie agrees with a faint smile that fades as soon as it appeared. “But I doubt this will be over in a few days as promised.”

Andy nods at him, looking suddenly weary. “Just like always, isn’t it? ‘The war will be over by Christmas.’ ‘We will take this island in a matter of days.’ They always say that and it’s never true.”

“Makes you wonder what kind of intelligence they have in the upper ranks, hm?” Eddie remarks with a huff. “I’m pretty sure I never saw any mountains on those maps they were so fond of showing us.”

He can feel Andy squeeze his hand. “Well, they’re obviously there and the Japs are hiding in them, so we better make the best of it.” He pauses, a thoughtful look on his face. “It won’t be easy getting to them in that terrain. They have the advantage and I have no doubt they’ll make good use of it. This will be a nightmare, Eddie.”

Eddie knows Andy’s right in his assessment. They didn’t expect the hills and they didn’t expect the Japs to hide. That’s new and it worries Eddie. They haven’t trained for this kind of battle. Usually the Japs come right at them in banzai charges and that’s terrifying enough but after two battles Eddie knows what to expect and he feels confident in dealing with that kind of assault. Now the tables have turned and the Japs have all the cards in their hands. They know the territory, they know the Americans will come for them and Eddie knows the Japs will be ready to tear them apart.

“Let’s hope we won’t have to go into those hills,” he says quietly. He’s sure Andy can feel him shuddering through their joint hands.

“We should go to Canada instead,” Andy says, and it’s so out of the blue that Eddie huffs out a laugh.

“You and your fixation on Canada,” he tells Andy fondly. Actually, he’s glad that Andy’s changed the topic because if Eddie thinks about the danger those hills represent any longer he won’t get any more sleep tonight, that’s for sure.

“What’s wrong with Canada?” Andy asks a little indignantly.

“Nothing,” Eddie laughs quietly. “I’d just rather run away with you right back home if it’s all the same to you.”

Andy is quiet for a moment. “Sure, that can be arranged.”

It takes Eddie aback a little. He’s not sure if Andy’s joking or not but the thought of him and Andy living somewhere close to home fills Eddie with warmth and a longing that has no place on a battlefield.

“As long as there’s enough space for Gina I’m fine with wherever you want to go,” Andy adds quietly.

Just like back on the LST a few days ago Eddie can see the two of them in front of a small house playing fetch with their dog.

“Why do I have the feeling that that dog will be the center of our lives?” Eddie asks with a smile.

Beside him, Andy rolls onto his side and moves a little bit closer. There’s a half-smile on his face when he looks at Eddie with incredibly soft eyes. “Don’t worry,” he whispers, “you’ll always be my number one.”

Eddie ducks his head. “Good to know,” he mumbles a little embarrassed, not knowing what else to say.

Andy squeezes his hand again. “Think you can go back to sleep now?” Eddie nods. “Good,” Andy continues. “Just think about little Gina running around and getting mud all over the floor and you’ll be alright. And I’m right here, Eddie. I’m right here.”

Eddie looks at Andy one last time before he nods and finally closes his eyes. He feels Andy squeeze his hand once more and expects him to let go, but Andy doesn’t. Eddie feels something in his chest unclench and allows his body to relax. Andy’s breathing softly next to him and his hand feels warm where it gently lays on top of Eddie’s. Around them guns are firing and shells are exploding in the distance but nothing of that matters because right here, right now Andy is alive and they have this small moment that will forever be theirs and it’s enough to put Eddie’s mind at ease.

He sleeps peacefully through the rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to wish everyone a nice weekend! I'm at a convention right now and having a great time! =)


	18. Peleliu - 22.09.1944

**Chapter 18: Peleliu - 22.09.1944**

Eddie screwed up. He knows it, Andy knows it, their company knows it. He screwed up last night on their patrol and it cost one man his life and the worst thing is that no one calls him out on it. In.stead there are understanding glances and hushed reassurances but none of that makes Eddie feel better. A man is dead because of him and Eddie can’t help thinking that something like this would never have happened if Andy had been there.

He feels absolutely awful when they trudge back to the airfield and the safety it represents. It’s a safe haven at the foot of those hills that have already brought death to a lot of good Marines. Eddie wishes they could have gone back one day earlier because on the airfield men can sleep without their nightmares getting them killed.

It’s not a conscious decision but he settles down away from the rest of the company when it’s getting dark. He wants nothing more than to curl up and shut the rest of the world out, even if it’s only for a short while. The urge to grieve for the life he took to save the rest of his patrol is almost overwhelming. He feels like he owes the man that much at least for what he’s done.

“Eddie?” he hears Andy’s voice quietly above him. “Are you alright?”

Is he alright? Eddie considers lying for a moment. It would be so easy to tell Andy that he’s fine so that Andy would leave him to his thoughts and grief. One look at Andy changes his mind though. There’s an earnest and worried expression on Andy’s face that envelops Eddie like a hug.

“No, I’m not alright,” he admits finally, head hanging low.

Andy nods and settles down next to him. He sighs and Eddie knows he’s searching for the right thing to say.

“Thought so,” Andy tells him softly. “Want to tell me about it?”

Andy already knows the story. Eddie told him earlier about what had happened because as company leader, Andy had to know and relay the information to command. But now Andy is asking as his friend and not as his commanding officer and Eddie finds himself telling him about last night once more.

“It was just a nightmare, Andy,” he begins, shaking his head in disbelief. “A simple nightmare that all of us have experienced in combat over time. The only difference was that he couldn’t snap out of it. I told the boys to wake him, to make him shut up but he wouldn’t. Instead he only got louder.”

“He was a danger to the other men,” Andy states calmly.

“He was,” Eddie agrees with a heavy sigh. “He was giving away our position and no matter what we tried he wouldn’t calm down. I knew there was only one thing to do so I hit him over the head with an entrenching tool, or something. I can’t remember. But I’ll never forget the silence that followed.”

Eddie can’t help but shudder and Andy moves a little closer. Eddie can feel his gaze resting on him before Andy’s hand gently grazes his where it lies between them.

“You saved the company,” Andy points out softly.

“I killed a man,” Eddie argues.

With a soft, sad smile, Andy tells him, “But you didn’t mean to. You wanted to knock him out. Your priority was the rest of the patrol. You didn’t do anything wrong, Eddie.”

Eddie snorts. “Doesn’t feel like it. I’m pretty sure things would have gone differently if you’d been in charge.”

“How so?” Andy challenges. “I’ve talked to a lot of the boys today and they all told me the same thing: one man was putting the company in danger and you tried everything to quiet him down before resorting to drastic measures. It’s not your fault that he wasn’t just knocked unconscious, Eddie. You didn’t mean to hurt or kill him. All you were trying was to save the rest of your men, him included. I would have done exactly the same thing had I been there.”

Eddie lowers his head when he feels tears prick his eyes. “I just … he was one of us, Andy. I should have been able to protect him, too.”

Andy sighs and Eddie can feel a warm arm coming around his shoulders. “We can’t save everyone, Eddie. You know that. Combat is relentless. It’s unfair. Awful things happen every day and we have no control over them. The best we can do is to remember those we’ve lost and not let them be forgotten.”

When Andy pulls him closer to him, Eddie closes his eyes and wills the tears away. “It doesn’t seem enough.”

He feels Andy shake his head. “It’s not but it’s all we have. You were in an impossible situation where every outcome is terrible and you chose the one solution that kept most of your patrol safe. That’s all anyone can hope to do in a situation like that.”

Eddie knows that Andy’s right. He knows he’s made the right decision in this no-win-scenario. He also knows that the pain he feels right now will take days, weeks, maybe forever to go away. The mind and the heart are two very different things and no matter how much his head tells him that he didn’t do anything wrong his heart can’t help but clench painfully every time he thinks about last night.

Still, Andy’s calm words and quiet support ease the pain a little bit and Eddie allows himself to relax against Andy’s shoulder.

“Thank you,” he tells him quietly.

“For what?” Andy asks softly.

Eddie shrugs. “For being here. For talking to me. For letting me grieve.” He pauses. “For trusting me.”

“I’d trust you with my life, Eddie,” Andy tells him earnestly. “And so would the rest of the boys. No one blames you for what happened last night.”

Eddie nods. “I know. I just wish that would make it easier.”

“What can I do?” Andy simply asks him.

Eddie can’t help but smile because that is so like Andy. “You already do enough.”

Instead of replying Andy leans his head against Eddie’s temple and Eddie feels like he can breathe again. They don’t say anything more because there is nothing else to say. Eddie knows, just as Andy does, that words cannot wipe away the pain, horror and guilt of the night before. He takes comfort in Andy’s warm weight and presence at his side. Tonight, he’ll allow himself to grieve for the man he couldn’t save so that tomorrow he can focus on the men that are still here and depend on him. He will try his best to keep them alive another day, another week - hopefully until the battle is won, whenever that may be.

But for now Eddie buries his head in Andy’s shoulder and simply allows himself to feel. Andy never lets go of him and gives him the time he needs to come to terms with what happened and Eddie’s grateful for that. In the end, when Eddie’s breathing is slowly evening out again Andy whispers softly, “You’re alright.”

Eddie almost believes him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter deals with a scene depicted in The Pacific where someone has a nightmare and has to be quieted down which results in his death. While reading Burgin's and Sloan's books I discovered that this happened during a patrol that Eddie led, and that the man had not been a Marine but from the Army. Apparently Eddie tried to calm him down with soothing words which didn't work. In the end someone hit the soldier with an entrenching tool. Afterwards no one ever said a word about who dealt the blow and I'm not quite sure who's doing it in the miniseries. I've chosen it to be Eddie for this story because he's in charge of the patrol and most likely to resort to drastic measures in order to keep his men save, but it could have been any other of the 40 guys who were on that patrol.


	19. Peleliu - 26.09.1944

**19\. Peleliu - 26.09.1944**

It’s not even a week later when it happens again. They’re in the Umurbrogol now, the one place on the island Eddie never wanted to set foot on, though he knew it was only a matter of time until command would send them into the deathtrap that the hills of Peleliu present. With only 37 casualties King is one of the least beat-up rifle companies in the entire division. They’ve been lucky so far but now it seems their luck has run out.

Yesterday they moved north with the entire 3rd Battalion along a path that had been dubbed Sniper Alley for obvious reasons. When it started to turn dark they settled in among the hills, all of them wary and jumpy in this new environment. Eddie and his fellow lieutenants did their best to calm down their men and provide reassurance but after the first Japanese attack in the night it’s hopeless. Everyone’s on edge and sleep was out of the question. The second attack didn’t help matters at all and no one got any sleep that night.

And then morning came and with it the dead body of a Marine.

Eddie’s standing in the middle of the road, staring down at a young private of their company who is lying sprawled on the ground, dead eyes looking up into the blue sky over Peleliu. Next to him Andy’s face is unreadable as they listen to their men’s account of what happened.

“We heard groaning on the road, sir,” Sledge tells them in a quiet, hushed voice. “We didn’t know who it was and it was too dark to see.”

“One of our guys went out to take a look,” Burgin continued, looking up at them with a pained expression on his face, “and then we heard a shot. He probably thought it was a Jap lying on the ground in the darkness.”

Eddie shakes his head, unable to look away from the private’s dead eyes. “Well, probably isn’t good enough, now is it?”

He feels a grounding hand on his shoulder and finally tears his eyes away from the body to look at Andy. The same grief he feels is written all over Andy’s face and with a sigh Eddie deflates and turns away from the dead private. “This shouldn’t have happened.”

“You’re right, it shouldn’t have happened,” Andy agrees with a calm voice, “but it has. It’s a tragic mistake but there’s nothing more we can do for him. What we can do, however, is make sure something like this doesn’t happen again. We have enough problems with the Japanese in these hills as it is. We don’t need our own guys shooting at each other. I know we’re all on edge here but we can’t take a gamble like that.” He looks at Eddie then. “I don’t want anyone out of their foxhole at night, Eddie. Pass that down the line.”

Eddie nods. “Will do, sir. Shall I get the stretcher bearers?”

Andy takes one last look at the young private lying in the mud before he turns his away from him. “Let’s get him home.”

Andy’s shoulders are slumped when he leaves, making him look beaten. With a sigh Eddie orders Burgin and Sledge to wait with the dead private until the stretcher bearers arrive. He follows Andy to their foxhole and radios their casualty in so that the Graves Registration Company can send someone to their position to pick up the body. Then he goes to meet up with the other lieutenants to relay Andy’s orders so that they can tell their platoons to stay in their foxholes during the night.

When he makes his way back to Andy’s and his foxhole he feels absolutely exhausted. It’s not even noon yet and all he wants is to curl up somewhere and shut the rest of the world out. Except Andy. Eddie can’t imagine any situation where he would not want Andy by his side. He sits down next to him and lets out a weary sigh.

“Here,” Andy says, passing him his canteen, “you look like you could use some water.”

“Thanks.” The water is still remotely cool despite the sun already beating down on them and Eddie takes a grateful sip.

“What a day to begin our work here in the hills, huh?” Andy says quietly while watching the line. “First those attacks during the night and now this. This could be disastrous for company morale.”

“We’re keeping it quiet,” Eddie assures Andy. “The officers know and some of the guys, but they won’t talk.”

Andy sighs, “That’s something, at least.” He turns around so that he’s facing Eddie. “How are you holding up? This can’t be easy for you after the patrol.”

Eddie shrugs and decides to be honest. Lying to Andy never works anyway. “I feel sick to my stomach and try not to think about it.”

“Yeah, me too,” Andy admits. “How am I going to tell his parents that he died heroically while protecting his country when I know he got killed by his own people because someone made a mistake?” He shakes his head. “And the worst thing is it’s going to happen again and again and again. Not just in King but in every other company out there and there’s nothing we can do about it.”

“I know,” is all Eddie says because what else can he say? He briefly looks around before he places a hand on Andy’s wrist and squeezes gently.

Andy graces him with a small smile. “You remember how they told us this battle would take three days tops?” he asks. It’s a rhetorical question. Of course Eddie remembers. “We’ve been here now for eleven days. Almost four times as long as we were supposed to and most of our troops have been crippled so badly they’re not combat effective anymore. I don’t know about you but I have a feeling that Peleliu is going to be a lot worse than anything we’ve seen before.”

“What brought this on?” Eddie asks, curious. “It’s not like you to be so pessimistic.” It worries him, seeing Andy so beaten down.

Andy shrugs. “Lack of sleep, probably.” He sighs. “I don’t know, I just have a bad feeling about this. We’re in over our heads here, Eddie. This is an enemy we don’t know. They’ve never hidden before, not like that and certainly not so cleverly. They have the advantage here and quite frankly, that worries me.”

“You fear we’re going to be decimated just like the other companies,” Eddie says, and when Andy closes his eyes tightly and nods he squeezes Andy’s arm again. “Look, Andy, I’m not going to tell you you’re wrong, because we both know that everything you said is true. All we can do is stick together and do our best and hope that we’re going to gain some ground and hold it. And if anyone can do that than it’s King.”

Andy huffs out a chuckle and looks at him with so much warmth in his eyes that it takes Eddie’s breath away for a moment. “What would I do without you, hm?”

“Be swallowed by despair?” Eddie suggests jokingly and can’t hide the grin when Andy punches his arm.

The tense atmosphere in their foxhole slowly dissipates and Eddie feels a lot better than half an hour ago when the tragedy of the night became known to them. The light is back in Andy’s eyes and that alone puts Eddie’s mind at ease. Sitting shoulder to shoulder in their crappy foxhole Eddie feels oddly content despite the heat, the stench and the pain of losing another company member. He feels as if he could get through anything as long as he has Andy, safe and happy, by his side and he hopes that Andy feels the same. He wants to be a pillar of strength for Andy just as Andy is for him.

Gently, he nudges Andy’s shoulder with his own and nods at him, smiling. Andy nods back and a silent understanding passes between them. Together, they turn their heads back towards the hills that hold so much danger for them. Eddie hopes that they will soon find a way to lure their enemies out of their holes and tunnels because otherwise, he fears, King will be trapped in these hills for weeks if not months to come. He doesn’t dare think about how many of their men will be left standing after that and can only pray that Andy will be among them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being a day late with the update. I still hope you enjoy this chapter!


	20. Peleliu - 12.10.1944

**20\. Peleliu - 12.10.1944**

After two nights at the aid station on the airfield Eddie is more than ready to leave the place. It’s a different kind of hell to the Umurbrogol hills his company is currently stuck in. Despair, pain and death are all around him, just like in the hills, but it’s another type of suffering to have to lie still and watch people around you scream for their mothers or whisper prayers to God. This place makes him respect the medical personnel in their troops even more, especially when he sees how much they give every day and every night to save as many people as they can. They don’t always succeed and those moments of silence, filled with quiet grief, are the worst. Eddie has no idea what a prolonged exposure to suffering and death like this will do to a man’s soul but after two nights watching and listening helplessly he can’t take it anymore and convinces one of the nurses to let him go outside.

His steps are slow as he makes his way through the bombed out building and his wound flares up with every one of them but he bites down on the pain and keeps moving until he is finally outside. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, trying to get his strength back. When he opens them again they’re immediately drawn to the Umurbrogol which almost cost him his life two days ago.

Eddie’s thoughts go to Andy and he hopes with all his heart that Andy is alright. A lot can happen in two days and there is this constant worry inside him that something will happen to Andy or maybe already has. Andy could be fighting for his life right now and it’s tearing Eddie apart that he just doesn’t know and has no way of being there for him. All he can do is look towards the hills and pray that sooner rather than later King Company will make its way down those slopes, maybe a little worse for wear, but still mostly intact, and with Andy in the front leading them, just how it’s supposed to be.

Eddie spends the whole day outside of the aid station. Sometimes he walks around a little. Other times he’s sitting on the ground, leaning against a crumbling wall and trying to rest. He knows he’s pushing his body but he can’t help it. It’s still better than being inside where people are dying all around him.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go inside and sleep a little, Lieutenant?” one of the nurses asks him around noon. Her name is Erica and she’s the one who let him go outside in the first place. “It’d be good for your healing process, you know.”

Eddie offers her a smile but shakes his head. “Thank you, ma’am, but I’m good.”

She sighs and nods. “Let me bring you something to eat, alright?”

She goes inside and a moment later she is back with a cup of hot soup. “Here you go, Lieutenant. Eat that up and I might let you stay out here a little while longer.”

Eddie carefully sits down on the ground and accepts the cup. “Thank you. I really appreciate it.”

He takes a couple of sips and savors them with his eyes closed until his gaze is drawn back to the hills. Her eyes follows it.

“Is your company still out there?” she asks him.

Eddie nods. “It’s been almost three weeks since we were sent into the hills.”

There’s a worry line between her eyes when she looks at him. “That’s a long time to spend in that wretched place. You were lucky to get out of it alive. A lot of men weren’t.”

Her eyes look incredibly sad and after the last two days Eddie has an inkling of the horrors she’s witnessed day in and day out since she came to Peleliu.

“I know,” he says quietly and takes another sip of the soup. “I haven’t had any news from my company since I’ve been wounded,” he finds himself telling her unprompted, not really knowing why. “I don’t know whether that means everything is going well and we’re finally making progress or … or that my men are in even more trouble than we were the last time I saw them.”

He eats the rest of the soup and hands her the empty cup. She smiles at him sadly. “I do hope your men are well and that you will see them again soon.”

“Me too,” Eddie admits.

With a comforting squeeze of his shoulder she goes back inside and leaves him to his thoughts. For a while, he rests against the building and once or twice he even manages to nod off.

It’s later, when he’s about to head back inside because the light is beginning to dim and his wound is really starting to aggravate him, when he sees more and more people coming down from the hills and moving onto the airfield. His pain forgotten, Eddie pushes himself up and leans heavily against the building. The men are too far away for him to identify but he can tell that they’re carrying a stretcher. He has no way of knowing who is on it or which company that is, but it doesn’t matter. Eddie still feels dread pooling deep in his stomach, simply because it could be King and it could be Andy lying there, possibly dead.

They move slowly across the airfield right in Eddie’s direction and the minutes tick by agonizingly slowly until they’re finally within identification distance. The moment he realizes that it’s Lieutenant Stanley and not Andy leading the company his eyes fall to the stretcher and his heart stops. He stumbles a step forward and barely manages to grip a wall for support. His legs are shaking so bad that they’re barely holding him up and all he can think of is, “No, no, no …”

He doesn’t realize that Sledge is breaking formation and making his way towards him until he is right in front of him, completely out of breath, and reassuring him that Andy is, indeed, alright.

“Don’t lie to me, Sledge,” is all Eddie can bring himself to say, because the thought of Andy dead on a stretcher tears him up inside and breaks something in him.

“I’m not,” Eugene says quietly but earnestly and Eddie wants to believe him so bad. “A bullet grazed him at the temple and caused a nasty concussion. He’s only on a stretcher because his balance is off and it was easier and faster to get him back here that way.”

Concussion. Andy was almost shot in the head and managed to survive it with only a concussion. It sounds too good to be true but Sledge is looking at him so sincerely, so understandingly that Eddie can’t help but believe him.

“Okay,” he says shakily and together they wait for the rest of the company to arrive. It’s the most agonizing five minutes of Eddie’s life. The company seems to move in slow motion and if his side wasn’t hurting so bad Eddie would have already been on his way to meet them halfway. Instead he is forced to wait with young Sledge by his side until the rest of their company arrives.

He almost doesn’t dare breathe when they put the stretcher down in front of him. There Andy lies, and he is smiling up at him, a little lopsidedly maybe but definitely alive. Then he closes his eyes against the light and Eddie’s knees buckle under him. He reaches out a shaking hand to touch Andy’s hair right above the bandage and it hits him then, really hits him, that Andy came so close to death that just the slightest tilt of his head would have killed him.

“Oh god, Andy,” is all he manages to choke out.

“Hey,” Andy says softly, looking up at him once more. Eddie can see that one of his eyes is more dilated than the other. “How’re you holding up?”

That question is so ridiculous that it startles a laugh out of Eddie. “How am I holding up? I’m not the one with a bullet hole in my head.”

“It’s just a graze,” Andy mumbles and Eddie wants to disagree, because it’s not just anything, not when his heart is still fluttering fearfully in his chest. “Apparently I’m lucky.”

“Of course you are,” Eddie says quietly, once more carefully touching the bloody hairs above the bandage, “but someday your luck may run out. You promised me you’d stay safe, Andy. You told me you’ll never break a promise.”

He whispers that last part and averts his eyes, trying very hard not to let his emotions get the better of him. It’s a lost cause the moment Andy reaches for his other hand and gently presses it down above his heart. Eddie feels it beating steadily and reassuringly right beneath his palm, unlike his own that is still beating frantically.

“See?” Andy says, voice quiet. “It’s still beating. I’m here, Eddie, and I’m not going anywhere.”

It’s the truth, simple as that, and all Eddie can do is nod. He bows his head and when he feels Andy’s thumb gently stroking the back of his hand he finally allows the tears to fall.

“Don’t ever do that to me again,” he whispers harshly, willing Andy to understand. “I wouldn’t know what to do without you.”

Before Andy can say something a different voice says, “Lieutenant? Your captain needs treatment.”

Hastily, Eddie brushes the tears away and looks up to see Nurse Erica and Doc Caswell, their corpsman, standing behind him. Erica’s face softens when she sees how distraught he is and Eddie would have been more than a little embarrassed if he wasn’t so happy and relieved right now. She kneels down next to the two of them.

“I promise we’ll take good care of him,” she says with an understanding smile. “And I’ll see what I can do to get him settled next to you. How’s that sound?”

“Good,” Eddie breathes out and shares one last look with Andy before they carry him inside. He feels strangely hollow, kneeling there on the concrete outside of the aid station. His company is probably staring at him, Eddie thinks, but he can’t bring himself to care or address them even though he knows he should. The men have just lost their captain and need some reassurance but right now Eddie is so exhausted that he’s not even sure he’ll be able to get to his feet. He struggles to get up anyway and is grateful when two slender hands grab his arms and help him up.

“Thank you, Nurse,” Eddie breathes out against the pain and dizziness that are threatening to overcome him.

Erica smiles at him. “Anytime, Lieutenant. Now, how about we get you back inside and you lie down for a while? I think that’s been enough excitement for today.”

She doesn’t wait for a reply, just gently steers him inside and towards his cot. Eddie winces when she helps him lie down and the pain flares up from his wound. He closes his eyes for a minute and just breathes.

“Do you want some morphine?” Erica asks him.

Eddie opens his eyes and shakes his head. “No, I just need a moment. Might have been on my feet too long.”

She stares at him pointedly but doesn’t comment on it.

“How is … how is my captain?” Eddie finally asks because while he trusts Sledge and Doc Caswell with his life it’s an entirely different matter when it comes to Andy’s.

Erica sighs and sits down next to him on the cot. “Your captain is fine, Lieutenant. Your corpsman did an excellent job. All your captain now needs are some stitches and a couple of weeks of rest.” She smiles at him. “Congratulations. This battle is over for you two.”

Eddie realizes she’s right. Weirdly he doesn’t feel relieved at all, only tired.

“Get some rest,” she tells him kindly. “I promise you to place your captain right next to you once he’s all stitched up.”

She puts one of her hands on his forehead and brushes the curls out of his eyes. The gesture is warm and comforting and Eddie feels his eyes close against his will.

“Sleep well, Lieutenant. You don’t have to worry anymore.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With this chapter the Peleliu arc of this story ends. It's another crossover chapter with the first story in this series and we finally get to see Eddie's pov when Andy is injured. I'm really fond of this chapter, I have to say, and I hope you like it as well. Next week we'll move onto the second Pavuvu arc. See you then!


	21. Pavuvu - Late October 1944

**21\. Pavuvu - Late October 1944**

They are finally back on Pavuvu. Never in his life would Andrew have thought that he’d be glad to see the rat-infested island again, but here he is, happy to be back in his old moldy tent. Most of all he’s just relieved to be back on solid ground. Being on an LST while suffering from a concussion is an experience Andrew is not looking forward to repeat any time soon. He still feels slightly disoriented and nauseous even though the ground beneath his feet is not moving at all. He hopes this will stop in the next few days.

In the tent next to him he can see Eddie moving about slowly and packing his things away. Andrew winces in sympathy when Eddie bends down and has to steady himself on his cot against the sudden rush of pain. He knows Eddie should be on Banika right now, in the hands of the best doctors in the Pacific, but Eddie was having none of it when their corpsman had tried to transfer him earlier today. Maybe he should have ordered Eddie to go, Andrew thinks worriedly as he watches Eddie straightening up again in a slow and obviously painful way. He knows Eddie’s physical wellbeing would have benefited greatly from a couple of weeks on Banika. At the same time he’s acutely aware that Eddie’s mind is a whole different matter. The way Eddie’s been since Andrew’s got hurt, always watching him and never letting him out of his sight if it can be helped, tells Andrew more than any words ever could that Eddie would be out of his mind with worry if he was separated from Andrew now. And, admittedly, Andrew himself isn’t quite keen on the idea of sending Eddie away, of not being able to take care of him himself.

Taking care of Eddie is exactly the thing he has in mind as he makes his way over to Eddie’s tent. “Do you need any help?” he asks softly so as not to startle him.

“Nah, got everything squared away,” Eddie tells him. When he turns around Andrew is shocked by how pale and out of breath he is.

“Why don’t you sit down for a while?” he carefully suggests. “You look ready to drop.”

To his surprise, Eddie shakes his head. “I’ve done nothing but sitting and lying around for days. I’d rather walk around a bit now that we’re here.”

Andrew wants to disagree because Eddie really looks like he’s about to keel over, but the determined and stubborn look in Eddie’s eyes tells him that Eddie is going to walk around Pavuvu, be it with or without Andrew’s help. So Andrew heaves a sigh and simply says, “Where do you want to go?”

Eddie’s answering smile is small but still manages to light up his face. “I thought the beach? Maybe bring my guitar. Just like old times.”

Andrew knows a lost fight when he sees one so he grabs Eddie’s beloved guitar without a word and stays close to his side while they make their way slowly down to the beach. They must present quite a strange sight, he thinks, with one of them slightly swaying on his feet because of coordination problems and the other one barely fit enough to stand. Still, somehow they manage their small journey without either of them falling down and hurting themselves even further.

Carefully, Andrew holds Eddie’s arm and helps him sit down in the sand once they’ve reached the beach. He sits down next to him, grateful not to be standing anymore, and hands Eddie his guitar. Eddie’s breathing is more than a little labored but Andrew doesn’t mention it because he knows it won’t do either of them any good.

“She’s been through a lot,” Eddie remarks softly as he places his guitar in his lap.

“We all have,” Andrew agrees quietly.

It’s true. Peleliu cost both of them a lot, physically and mentally. Seeing the person you love more than anyone else in the world get shot and being unable to do anything to help him changed a person. It’s obvious that Eddie’s afraid to let Andrew out of his sight because he’s come so close to losing him, and Andrew has no idea what to do about that. It’s not good for either of them to be so co-dependent on each other. Rationally, Andrew knows that the best course of action would be to transfer Eddie to another company, but from an emotional standpoint he would rather cut off his own arm than send Eddie away. The situation they’re in is a mess, but it’s their mess and he has to stay positive that they’ll be able to handle it.

“Anything special you’d like to hear?” Eddie asks into the quiet that settled between them.

Andrew offers him a soft smile. “Everything you play is special to me.”

It has the desired effect. Eddie’s eyes catch his and there’s a light reddish color adorning his cheeks.

With a smile, Eddie strums the first chords and even to Andrew’s tone-deaf ears the instrument sounds horribly out of tune.

Eddie winces and starts tuning string after string. “She hasn’t been that bad since Melbourne,” he remarks. Andrew always marvels at his ability to simultaneously hold a conversation and listen to the notes of his guitar.

“Does she need new strings?” Andrew asks. He hopes the answer will be no because there’s no way they’re getting their hands on guitar strings on Pavuvu.

To his relief, Eddie shakes his head. “No, I just haven’t played her in a while. A little tuning should fix it.”

Soon enough, Eddie’s finished and the chords he strums out sound like liquid honey to Andrew’s ears. He sighs and relaxes into the sand.

“That sounds a lot nicer,” he says with a smile.

“Sure does,” Eddie agrees.

It doesn’t take long until Andrew recognizes the familiar chords of Waltzing Matilda. He’ll probably never get tired of hearing Eddie play what most Marines now consider their hymn. It’s a simple yet beautiful tune that sometimes haunts Andrew’s dreams. Eddie is quietly humming along to his playing and a feeling of peace washes over Andrew. This is how it should be, he thinks. Him and Eddie on a beach with a guitar and no gunfire or shells around them. Just the two of them and a song. Peleliu almost took this from him. He remembers the moment Eddie got wounded, remembers the way his chest clenched painfully. He also remembers the moment the stretcher bearers stumbled, causing Eddie to roll off his stretcher which ultimately saved his life in the process as a bullet burst through the thin material where Eddie had been lying just a few seconds before. He remembers his heart stopping for a moment, remembers freezing up before he hollered for them to get Eddie out of there.

“Shit,” Eddie curses quietly beside him, forcing Andrew out of his memories and back into the present. He turns his head around to see what’s wrong and find out why Eddie stopped playing. Eddie’s guitar lies discarded in the sand next to him and every protective instinct in Andrew flares up as he sees Eddie hunched over with his hands pressed tightly against the wound in his side.

For a moment he feels just as helpless as he had on Peleliu. He reminds himself that they’re on Pavuvu now and that there is no one around, no company to lead, no one to see, so Andrew moves closer and wraps a supporting arm around Eddie’s shoulder to steady him.

“It hurts,” Eddie explains harshly between taking short and shallow breaths. “When I breathe in too deep it hurts.”

He sounds extremely frustrated so Andrew gently pulls him closer and forces Eddie to relax against him.

“Give it time,” he murmurs softly into Eddie’s curls. “Don’t push yourself too hard, Eddie. You’re still healing.”

“I just wanted to give you something to smile about,” Eddie whispers into his shoulder. “You never laugh anymore. You’re always frowning nowadays.”

He was? Andrew hadn’t noticed. His face smoothes out as he relaxes and presses a loving kiss into Eddie’s curls. It’s as much as he allows himself.

“I just worry a lot right now, you know?” he whispers back, trying to explain. “About you, about everyone else who made it back, and about the families of those who didn’t. And the constant headache I’m having isn’t exactly helping.” He sighs. “But you don’t have to put on a show for me, Eddie.”

“I didn’t know what else to do,” Eddie confesses, sounding defeated.

“I know,” Andrew says, his heart aching for him. “But this here, right now – it’s good, isn’t it? Just resting, letting everything sink in, being together. It’s more than enough, Eddie.”

Against his shoulder Eddie’s breathing finally slows down a bit. “I’m so tired of all this, Andy.”

It’s a step in the right direction. Since they met up again at the aid station on Peleliu Eddie had tried so hard to take care of Andrew without letting show how hurt he himself was. And Andrew knows it’s partly his fault because he told Eddie that these feeling between them couldn’t go deeper, couldn’t be explored right now. Eddie had agreed to follow Andrew’s lead and now Andrew realizes that this means that Eddie will never take the first step and talk about what’s bothering him. Instead Eddie hides and buries his feelings and tries to show Andrew in any other possible way how much he cares, even if it means aggravating his wound while trying to sing because he knows it always makes Andrew happy.

“I’m sorry,” Andrew tells him, feeling his eyes mist over as the implications of their situation hit him. “I’m sorry this is how it has to be.”

“Me too,” Eddie says.

They’re both silent for a while. Andrew’s eyes are focused on the ocean. The gentle rolling of the waves is mesmerizing and calming at the same time. Beside him, Eddie is a warm and comforting presence at his side. Andrew’s glad to notice that Eddie’s breathing has finally returned to normal.

“We should probably head back,” Eddie says into the silence between them.

He’s about to put some distance between Andrew and himself and Andrew’s arms tighten around him.

“Andy?” Eddie asks, sounding unsure.

“We should head back,” Andrew agrees with a quiet hum, “but I don’t want to. Do you?”

He feels Eddie shaking his head.

Andrew smiles and Eddie’s eyes light up. “Then we’ll stay just a little longer. Let’s be irresponsible for once. I think we’ve earned that.”

Eddie nods and simply moves a little closer, grips Andrew’s uniform a little tighter and leans his head against Andrew’s shoulder. It feels like home, Andrew decides as he laces his fingers with Eddie’s and holds on tight. Right now this quiet reassurance that they’re still here is enough to calm both of them down.

It isn’t long before Eddie’s breathing evens out and he falls into an exhausted sleep. Andrew wants nothing more than to follow him into a dreamless slumber but out here on the beach anyone could stumble upon them. So instead of closing his eyes he stays awake and watches over this incredible person next to him who, for some reason, has given him his heart and trusts him with his life. Despite the paleness, the malnourishment and dark shadows underneath his eyes Eddie is the most beautiful thing Andrew’s ever seen, and Andrew will cherish every moment he will be allowed to have to hold him like that. He hopes there will be many more to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being a day late with this chapter. I've been ill since Friday and didn't have the motivation to edit this chapter. Anyway, we're back on Pavuvu now with Andy's p.o.v. for the next couple of chapters. Expect some decision-making, letter-writing, guitar-playing and fluff and angst ;-)


	22. Pavuvu - Mid-November 1944

**22\. Pavuvu - Mid-November 1944**

It’s barely midday and Andrew can already feel exhaustion creeping into his bones. With a sigh he sets the pen down and rubs his hands tiredly over his eyes. He’s been working on the letters to the families of his fallen men since breakfast, and the sheer number he has to write is both staggering and nauseating. He tries to include some personal sentences about every one of his Marines in each letter but after so many hours he has no meaningful words left. Every phrase he comes up with has already been used and he feels like he’s failing his men. It shouldn’t be so hard to include one or two anecdotes to show the families that he’s known and cared about the boys under his command but he’s reached the point where every word sounds hollow and every phrase seems empty. It’s frustrating and painful and for the last twenty minutes he’s been staring at a blank page, unable to even write down a formal address to the parents of yet another soul that won’t be going home.

“Care to join me for lunch?” a soft voice Andrew would recognize anywhere asks behind him.

“God, yes,” Andrew says with a tired sigh and immediately feels guilty for being so relieved to escape his duty, even if it’s only for half an hour at most. He can’t afford to lose more time, especially when he looks at the numerous names still on his list.

“Come on, then,” Eddie says with a small smile. He holds out his hand and Andrew gladly takes it and lets himself be pulled up. They’ve been on Pavuvu for two weeks now and Eddie’s wound has finally healed enough for him to be up for light physical exercises and judging by his flushed cheeks Eddie’s just come back from a light run along the beach.

“Your wound doing alright?” Andrew can’t help but ask him as they make their way toward the mess tent.

Eddie rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “It’s fine, Andy. I promise you I’m not overexerting myself. I can do without getting chewed out by you and the doc. You do know you’re both scary if you team up on someone, right?”

Andrew knows that very well which is the reason why he does it. A week after coming back to Pavuvu Eddie had been so anxious to get back on his feet and move about that he foolishly went and helped some of their Marines to get their tent back up after it caved in during a storm. One wrong move had Eddie doubling over in pain and people shouting alternatively for Andrew and a corpsman. Doc Caswell was already giving Eddie a piece of his mind when Andrew arrived and Andrew joined right in, letting Eddie know just how worried he’d been. Apparently, it left a lasting impression.

“Don’t do anything stupid and Doc and I won’t team up on you,” Andrew tells him with a shrug.

“Doc gave me the okay for light runs,” Eddie mumbles a little petulantly. He holds the door to the mess tent open for Andrew and steps in after him.

They stand in line and wait quietly for their chow. It’s not much. Rice with some meat but Andrew feels extremely grateful for the orange juice that’s being served at every lunch. It’s a marvelous feeling to drink something sweet after living on just water for so long, especially in this heat.

Spotting a table across from his mortar platoon, Andrew motions Eddie over and nods towards his Marines. “Boys,” he says in acknowledgement as he sits down. He starts eating at once, barely stopping to swallow and breathe because he needs to get back to those letters sooner rather than later. The next one on his list is for Pvt. Gilbert’s family and he tries very hard not to think about the fact that he’s only made it to the letter G so far.

“There’s no need to inhale your food, Andy. It won’t run away, you know?” Eddie suddenly says. Andrew doesn’t even realize what he’s doing until Eddie places a hand on top of his. “Stop, Andy. You really need to stop.”

Eddie’s blue eyes are full of sympathy and understanding when Andrew looks up. In that moment he feels so grateful and relieved that he didn’t lose Eddie on Peleliu and doesn’t have to start a letter with the words ‘Dear Mr. and Mrs. Jones’.

With a sigh he puts his fork down. “I can’t,” Andrew confesses quietly and tells Eddie about his inability to find the right words and his need to make the letters personal because their boys deserve at least that much from him.

“I know,” Eddie says and Andrew believes him. If anyone can understand how he feels right now it’s Eddie. “But you’re working yourself to the ground and I won’t have that. After what we’ve been through, you deserve some rest instead of days filled with writing mission reports or letters home to families. There’ll be enough time to write those letters.”

Andrew wants to believe him, he does. He just can’t. “But what if there won’t be?” he asks and even to his own ears his words sound challenging. “What if we’re being shipped out next week and more letters need to be written?”

The moment he says that he knows how ridiculous it is and Eddie lists him the various reasons why they won’t be going anywhere for a while with a voice that’s both calm and understanding. It grounds Andrew in a way his own thoughts can’t. Hearing Eddie say that they’re unfit for combat right now, that no one in their right mind would send them into battle, makes something in his chest unclench and for the first time since he woke up this morning he feels like he can breathe.

He sends Eddie a grateful smile. “Would you,” he begins, not really knowing how to finish that sentence. Clearing his throat, he tries again, “Would you help me? With the letters, I mean?”

“Of course I will,” Eddie says immediately and it sounds so matter of fact that Andrew wonders why he hasn’t asked him sooner. “You know that.”

Andrew nods but can’t keep himself from explaining further, needing Eddie to understand that he’s not asking this lightly. “It’s just, there’s some men I didn’t know that well, but I know you did and maybe you’ll be able to find better words than I could and-“

Eddie stops him right there. “I’ll help you,” he tells him again, quietly and firmly. “I’ll always help you, Andy. We’ll do this together, just like everything else.”

Together, Andrew thinks fondly. They’re good together, an almost unstoppable force. With Eddie by his side he feels like anything can be possible. He nods at Eddie and knows that Eddie understands. When Eddie removes his hand from Andrew’s they continue to eat the rest of their chow in silence and at a slower pace. Andrew suspects that Eddie is eating extra slowly for his benefit, to give him a couple more minutes away from his duties, but he doesn’t comment on it.

Once Eddie’s finished they clear their plates away and walk back to Andrew’s tent. Andrew pulls up the trunk containing his belongings and papers, spreads a blanket across it and offers it to Eddie to sit on.

“Where are you stuck at?” Eddie asks him as he sits down, peering at the list of names.

“Private Matthew Gilbert,” Andrew says with a sigh. “I can barely remember his face, to tell you the truth.” He feels extremely guilty about that.

Eddie simply nods. “No wonder when you have so many men under your command. He had black hair and green eyes. Came from New Jersey, if I remember correctly.”

Andrew checks the address and nods. “You’re right.”

“I think he has an older brother in the Air Force that’s stationed in England,” Eddie continues, trying to remember. “A bomber pilot. And there were two younger sisters, twins.”

“Do they serve?” Andrew asks.

Eddie shakes his head. “No, Gilbert was barely 19 when he came to Pavuvu. His sisters are fifteen or sixteen at most, I think.”

Andrew nods and starts to write. He addresses the letter to Gilbert’s parents and writes the formal words that are included in every letter like this, that their son fought bravely for his country and died a hero, while Eddie keeps telling him everything he knows about Gilbert.

“I remember him telling me that he played the piano. His mother taught him as a child. He always admired my guitar, saying he wanted to learn to play but his mother wouldn’t let him. I taught him a couple of chords before we shipped out and offered to teach him properly after Peleliu, but – well, that’s not going to happen now, is it?”

Andrew stops in his writing and looks up at Eddie. “A lot of things never will, now,” he says. They’re both quiet for a moment, silently grieving for all the lives lost, all the wonders these people could have brought to the world.

“Do you have enough for the letter?” Eddie asks after a moment.

They share a soft smile and Andrew nods. “Yeah, I think so.”

He finishes the letter with his signature and hands it to Eddie to read.

“Your son was part of my machine gun platoon under Lieutenant Jones,” Eddie reads aloud. “He always enjoyed it when Lieutenant Jones took out his guitar and played for the men, voice ringing out during the sing-a-longs. Matthew didn’t know how to play but wanted to learn, so Lieutenant Jones taught him in their free time. Your son will always be remembered fondly by those who were fortunate enough to know him better. I offer my sincerest condolences to you, his brother and his sisters.” A faint smile appears on Eddie’s lips. “That’s good, Andrew.”

Andrew shrugs. “I wish there was more I could do.”

“You already did your best,” Eddie tells him. “Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. I remember someone telling a young Marine on Peleliu that you can’t dwell on it.”

There’s a twinkle in Eddie’s eyes when Andrew glances up. “Must have been a wise man,” Andrew muses.

Eddie’s lips curl up into a smile. “Oh, he was, don’t you worry. Now, who’s up next?”

Andrew puts the letter to Pvt. Gilbert’s family away and reaches for his list. “Corporal Goldstein.”

“He comes from a farm,” Eddie says immediately. “He always talked about his cats and …”

Andrew spends the rest of the day listening to Eddie’s memories of their lost comrades. It takes them until after midnight to finish the last letter, but they don’t mind. In the end, they both feel empty inside and mentally exhausted and Andrew catches Eddie’s hand before Eddie leaves for his own tent and holds on for a moment.

“Thank you, Eddie. Really. Thank you.”

It’s not eloquent and doesn’t begin to convey the gratitude Andrew feels to Eddie for supporting him in this task. He knows that Eddie understands, though, sees it in the softness of his eyes and feels it in the gentle stroking of a thumb across the back of his hand.

“Always, Andy. Good night.”

“Good night, Eddie,” he says quietly and lets him go.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is another one of those crossover chapters with the first fic of this series and we get to see Andy working on the letters to the family of fallen Marines. I always figured Andy to be the kind of guy who would try to make those letters at least a little personal because he really seems to care about his men. As far as I know there wasn't a Pvt. Matthew Gilbert in King Company, but if there was, I mean no disrespect.


	23. Pavuvu - Early December 1944

**23: Pavuvu - Early December 1944**

“Eddie?”

Andrew’s voice is soft and unsure as he knocks on the door to Eddie’s tent. His stomach has been in knots for days and he dreads the talk he’s about to have with Eddie. He knows he’s already put it off for far too long and when, this morning, the colonel told him quite plainly that he expects Andrew to make a decision by tomorrow Andrew knew his time was up.

“What’s wrong?” Eddie asks immediately, sitting up on his cot and squinting up at Andrew in the dim light.

Andrew always marvels at the fact that Eddie can read him so easily. He tries to put on a brave smile that comes off a little too wobbly. “Walk with me to the beach? There’s something I need to talk to you about.”

Eddie looks at him warily for a moment before he pulls on his boots and follows him out into the twilight of the evening without another word being said. Together they cross the rubble paths of Pavuvu until they reach the sandy shores where the waves come rolling in. Now that they’re here Andrew has no idea how to start this conversation. All he wants is for Eddie to be happy, but he knows that what he is about to tell him is going to break Eddie’s heart, something he vowed to himself he would never do.

“Andy?” Eddie asks into the silence between them. “What’s going on? You’re making me nervous.”

“Sorry,” Andy says and rakes a hand through his hair. “It’s just – I don’t know how to say this.”

Beside him, Eddie’s steps falter and his eyes widen. “Are you … are you ending this? Us?” he asks quietly. He looks impossibly young and small as he stares at Andrew with frightened blue eyes.

“No, Eddie! God, no,” Andrew hurries to reassure him. He reaches for Eddie’s hands, not even bothering to check if anyone is around to see them. “Of course not.”

Eddie visibly relaxes. “Good. That’s – that’s good.” He breathes out a shaky sigh. “You had me worried there for a moment, Andy.”

“Why don’t we sit down?” Andrew suggests, stalling for time and hating himself for it.

Eddie shakes his head. “Just tell me what’s going on? Please? I can see it’s eating you up. It has for days, hasn’t it? I’m sure we can deal with it, whatever it is, but you have to talk to me, Andy.”

Andrew looks into the bright blue eyes that swept him off his feet so many months ago and takes a deep breath. “I’m staying on.”

There, he’s said it. He thought he’d feel lighter afterwards but his chest still feels constricted with dread and fear. It makes him briefly wonder whether his decision is the right one after all.

Eddie blinks once and then says, his eyes never leaving Andrew’s, “Alright.”

“Alright?” Andrew repeats incredulously. “I’ve just told you that I’m not going home even though I can and probably should, that I’m staying here for another battle and all you say is ‘alright’?” He shakes his head in disbelief. Of all the ways he imagined Eddie to react this had never even crossed his mind.

Eddie simply shrugs. “Well, what do you want me to say?” he asks. “I can see you’ve already made up your mind. And I’m not blind, you now? I knew something’s been bothering you the last couple of weeks and I thought it either might have something to do with us or with staying on. I just … I just wish you’d have talked to me about it, you know? Because talking is all we have and if we don’t even do that, then what do we have left?”

Andrew’s chest tightens painfully. “I wanted to talk to you, Eddie. It’s just … I didn’t want you to feel pressured to stay on as well just because I am,” he tries to explain. “I want you to go home and see your family again, just like you’ve been looking forward to for so long. You always sound so happy when you talk about them and what you want to do once you’re back, going swimming with your brothers and sisters, helping your Mama with the flowers in the garden. All those special little things. I didn’t want to influence your decision.”

“Well,” Eddie says with a soft, sad smile, “I’m sure the flowers will do just fine without my help for a little while longer.”

Andrew shakes his head and feels tears form in his eyes. “No, Eddie.”

Eddie reaches out and squeezes his hands. “I’ve already told the colonel I’ll be staying on if you are. I’ve made that decision a long time ago, Andy, so don’t you go thinking this is your fault.”

“But there’s so much waiting for you back home,” Andrew tries, even though he’s known Eddie long enough now to know that once Eddie’s made up his mind about something it’s hard to get him to change it.

“True,” Eddie agrees. “But my future’s standing right here in front of me.”

“Oh god,” Andrew laughs and even though it’s a little choked up it’s probably exactly the reaction Eddie was hoping for. “That’s so horribly corny.”

Eddie laughs with him and pulls him into an embrace. “But it’s still true. I want to see my family again, Andy. I’m homesick. It’s been years since I’ve seen them all and I miss them so much. I’m not going to lie to you about that. But you … If I went home now without you I’d miss you just as fiercely as I miss them now, maybe even more. You’re my family and home, too, Andy. It’s as simple as that.”

“Simple as that,” Andrew murmurs disbelievingly into Eddie’s shoulder.

“Yes,” Eddie assures him.

There’s so much love and devotion in that one three-letter-word that it takes Andrew’s breath away and he quietly lets the tears fall into the thin fabric of Eddie’s uniform. Eddie’s arms tighten around him and Andrew gets what Eddie means by saying that he’s home, too. When they’re like this, just being close to and holding each other, Andrew feels at peace with the world in a way he only has at home before. There are no worries anymore, no thoughts about battles fought or yet to come, no grief for all the boys they’ve lost. There is just Eddie, the warmth of his hand on the nape of his neck, the softness of his curls against Andrew’s cheeks and the love in each and every word he says.

“You’re amazing,” Andrew tells him quietly.

He feels Eddie shrug self-consciously. “You mean the world to me,” is all he says by way of explanation.

Andrew leans back a little to look up into Eddie’s eyes. He smiles when he feels Eddie’s thumb brush away the wetness on his cheeks. “So we’re staying, huh?”

Eddie nods. “Looks like it.”

“Though I’d rather have you safe and back home with your family,” Andrew begins, “I’m glad you’re here with me, Eddie. Sometimes I can’t believe how lucky I am to have you.”

Eddie’s lips quirk up in a smile. “Let’s see if you still think that after I make you explain to my Mama why her oldest boy chose not to come home from the war when he got the chance.”

Andrew hides his face in Eddie’s chest at the thought of Mama Jones’s reaction. “Guess it’s the least I can do to take the brunt of your Mama’s wrath.”

Eddie chuckles and Andrew feels him press a soft, fleeting kiss to his head. “Don’t worry, Mama already knows. I told her in my last letter that there was the possibility I’d be staying on. She wasn’t too happy, mind you, but I think she understands, in a way. She sends her love.”

“You’re Mama is just as amazing as you are,” Andrew says in wonder, finally letting go of Eddie. “I’m looking forward to meeting her in person one day.”

Eddie smiles at him. “She does, too. I think she’s very fond of you. She tells me she’s talking to your mother on the phone at least twice a week.”

“She does?” Andrew says, surprised. “I thought your parents couldn’t afford a phone.”

Eddie sits down in the sand and tugs at Andrew’s hand to pull him down next to him. They’re sitting close enough for their shoulders and legs to touch.

“They can’t,” Eddie says. “Which is why, apparently, your mother got Mama a telephone for her birthday to make communication easier and Mama has taken to it like a fish to water.”

Andrew grins. “So that was the secret present my mother talked about in her latest letter.”

“Seems like it,” Eddie says with a chuckle. “Mama feels extremely privileged right now and I can just imagine her rounding up all the neighbors and presenting her new telephone to them. You’re family is very generous.”

“Well,” Andrew says, knowing that the Jones family doesn’t take too kindly to being thought of as a charity case, “my mother profits from that as well, you know? She hates writing letters, actually, so she’s made her own life a lot easier by doing this. And I’m sure there’ll come a time when your Mama can repay her in some way.”

Eddie grins bashfully at that. “She’s already sent a package full of baked goods to make up for it.”

“You think she’ll send us some of her delicious cookies come Christmas? I love my mother’s cooking but your Mama’s cookies are the best I’ve ever tasted, hands down,” Andrew says dreamily.

Eddie laughs. “I already asked her to send you a package as well.”

“Really?” Andrew says with a huge smile. “I could kiss you right now.”

They’re both quiet for a moment, gazes locked and filled with wistful longing.

“I wish you would,” Eddie whispers.

“Me, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to tminuseternity for your kind comment on the last chapter. I'm always happy when people enjoy this story =) 
> 
> Just a quick info: I'm on vacation the next to Saturdays and can't promise I'll find the time to update on time, so the next two chapters might be a little late or, worst case scenario, won't happen at all.


	24. Pavuvu - 01.01.1945

**24\. Pavuvu - 01.01.1945**

_Dear Andrew,_

_I hope it is not too presumptuous of me to call you by your given name? Over the last months and years I have heard so much about you, from both Eddie and your mother, that I feel like you’re part of the family even though we have never met. You have become as dear to me as my own children._

_In his last letter Eddie mentioned that you very much enjoyed my Christmas cookies last year and asked me to send some for you as well. I hope you’ll enjoy these just as much as the last ones, but don’t eat them all at once. Keep some of them for a rainy day and they will make you feel better._

_Stay safe and look after my Eddie._

_With love,_   
_Alice Jones_

The letter from Eddie’s mama never fails to bring a smile to Andrew’s face, no matter how often he reads it. He has never met Alice Jones, of course, but he’s seen a picture of her that Eddie keeps with him and he can just imagine her blue eyes, just like Eddie’s, soften with fondness as she wrote this letter all those weeks ago in her small kitchen. The words are full of love and warmth and Andrew feels incredibly blessed that she considers him to be family simply because she knows that he means a lot to her son.

She doesn’t seem to blame him for Eddie’s decision to stay with the Marines and not come home for Christmas. Instead all she asks for is that he keeps her son safe and Andrew hopes with all his heart that this is something he will never fail to do. He couldn’t live with himself if something happened to Eddie because of him. It’s that thought that keeps Andy awake sometimes, that causes him to doubt his decision to stay during the darkest hours of the night.

Pulling up a sheet of paper and picking up a pen, Andrew writes down a reply to Eddie’s mama:

_Dear Mrs. Jones,_

_First of all, I would like to wish you and your family a happy New Year! It’s just a couple of hours after midnight here as I’m writing to you. I hope that you and your family have a splendid party. Hopefully next year, Eddie and I will be home to celebrate with you._

_I’m writing this letter to you to thank you for the cookies you sent over for Christmas. It was very kind of you to send a package for me along with Eddie’s. I really appreciate it and, as per your suggestion, I’ve rationed them. Eddie doesn’t seem to believe me capable of restraining myself, though, because I know he’s put some of his aside for me. Just one more way he’s taking care of me._

_Mrs. Jones, your son has become very special to me during our acquaintance. He keeps me sane, makes me smile and is always there for me. I wouldn’t be able to do all this without him which is why I want to do something for him in return and for that, I need your help. Eddie’s birthday is coming up in May as you well know and by then we might be back in the thick of things which is why I’m writing this to you now. I wanted to ask you if you could round up your family and any childhood friends of Eddie’s and anyone else who meant a lot to him growing up and ask them to write a short letter to him. Eddie always enjoys mail from home and I think it would make him very happy to receive a whole bunch of letters on his birthday. I thought you could collect the letters and send all of them to me in one package. I’ll keep them save until his birthday and surprise him, then. It would be great if you could include something made by Jeannie as well because I know Eddie misses her very much. Since she can’t write yet, maybe she could draw something for him? Whatever it is I’m sure he’ll love it._

_Let me close this letter with another thank you for the cookies and your generosity in general. I am looking forward to the day when I can meet you and the rest of the Jones family in person._

_With love,_   
_A. A. Haldane_

Once he’s finished Andrew folds the letter and puts it in an envelope which he addresses to Eddie’s mama. He leans back in his chair and stretches his arms above his head. It’s early in the morning of New Year’s Day and most of the camp is still asleep after a night of partying and drinking.

Andrew celebrated with Eddie in private. They spent the evening together in Andrew’s tent with Eddie playing one song after another on his guitar just for Andrew. When the clock stroke midnight they had shared a quiet smile, and Andrew had taken Eddie’s hand in his and placed a gentle kiss on the back of it that had made Eddie blush.

“Next year I’ll do better,” Andrew promised him quietly.

He wishes he could have captured that moment in a picture. Eddie’s eyes had been bright with happiness and the way he had ducked his head shyly afterwards had been absolutely endearing. Thinking back on it Andrew can’t help but wonder how Eddie will look once he finally gets to kiss him properly. Hopefully 1945 will be their lucky year. Maybe the war will come to an end at last and they’ll get to go home and won’t have to be captain and lieutenant anymore, just Andy and Eddie. It’s a thought that makes him smile.

“You’re up early,” Eddie suddenly whispers behind him.

Andrew’s face lights up. He’ll never tire of hearing Eddie’s voice.

“So are you,” he observes, turning around in his chair to look up at Eddie.

Eddie shrugs. “Thought I’d start the year with a run on the beach,” he explains. “Maybe save some drunken privates from drowning along the way.”

Andrew snorts. “Let’s hope we won’t have to do that.”

“We?” Eddie asks, his eyes lighting up. “Are you saying you’re coming with me?”

“I guess I am,” Andrew says. “But,” he says, holding up a finger, “only if you don’t run like a madman. I don’t want to start the year with a heart attack.”

Eddie laughs. “Just a morning jog, I promise.”

“Then lead the way.”

Eddie keeps his promise. His pace is still taxing but Andrew has no problem keeping up. Side by side, they run along the beach, sometimes in the sand, sometimes in the surf. They don’t stumble upon privates or Marines of other ranks drowning along the way which Andrew counts as a blessing. The sun is slowly rising to their right and tinges the white sands of Pavuvu a beautiful orange. The island is quiet except for the birds that begin their morning songs and the bats that return to their day roosts. It’s peaceful and beautiful, a side of Pavuvu Andrew rarely appreciates.

Next to him, Eddie slows to a stop and looks out at the ocean. “Watch the sunrise with me?” he asks after a breathless moment.

They’re far enough away from the camp and it’s too early for anyone sane to be out and about after a night of drinking, so Andrew feels bold enough to reach for Eddie’s hand and simply holds it. Eddie smiles at him and, just like last night, he ducks his head for a moment before his gaze returns to the sunrise. They stay that way, holding hands and unmoving, until the sky loses its orange and pink tinges and returns to the light blue they’ve become so used to here.

“You were writing a letter when I came to your tent earlier,” Eddie says into the quiet of the morning. “Was it to your parents?”

Andrew shakes his head. “No, to your mama, actually.” When he sees Eddie’s surprised look, he explains, “I haven’t managed to thank her for the cookies yet.”

He doesn’t mention his idea for Eddie’s birthday present, of course.

“So you thought you’d get up at four in the morning on New Year’s Day to finally send her a reply?” Eddie asks, chuckling.

Andrew shrugs. “Seemed like a good idea at the time?” He lets out a laugh. “Actually, someone stumbled into my tent and almost tore it down in the process which woke me up. I had to accompany him to his own tent to be sure he’d make the trip safely and afterwards I couldn’t get back to sleep. So I decided to do something productive with my time. What’s your excuse?”

“Lieutenant Stanley snores when he’s had a couple of beers,” Eddie admits with a grimace.

Andrew winces in sympathy but is unable to hide his grin. “Not much sleep for the both of us last night, then.”

“Could be worse,” Eddie says with a shrug. “And this was nice. We should go on morning runs together more often.”

“You just want to see me suffer,” Andrew accuses him with a teasing grin.

Eddie laughs and Andrew briefly wonders if his mama’s laugh is just as lovely and captivating or if he sounds more like his father. “I just want to spend time with you,” Eddie tells him with a soft smile.

Something in Andrew’s chest tightens at the longing in Eddie’s voice. Eddie never asks him for anything and rarely tells him what he wants, so Andrew doesn’t even have to think about his reply.  “Alright. When do you usually go running?”

“0530, give or take,” Eddie tells him a little surprised.

Andrew gives Eddie’s hand a squeeze. “Then I’ll be sure to set my alarm tomorrow.”

Eddie looks down at their joint hands. “Thank you, Andy.”

There’s nothing more to say about it, so Andrew stays quiet. He hates that he can’t give Eddie more. They’ve been together, for lack of a better word, for almost half a year now. They’ve survived the land crabs and rats of Pavuvu and the terror of the Umurbrogol of Peleliu. He wants to take Eddie in his arms and spin him around the beach. He wants to tell the whole world how much he loves this man with his blond curls and impossibly blue eyes. He wants to kiss Eddie under the stars at night and in the bright sun of daylight. He wants so much and he knows Eddie does, too. He also knows that they can’t have any of that, not yet. He can’t take Eddie in his arms whenever he wants to. He hasn’t kissed Eddie yet and he hasn’t told him that he loves him. Not out loud, anyway. He tries to show Eddie with everything he does, though, and he knows that Eddie understands, but at times like this it still feels like it’s not enough.

An idea forms in Andrew’s mind, then, as he watches Eddie look out across the ocean. He can’t shout it from the rooftops, but he can write it down, in a way that makes his feelings for Eddie clear but doesn’t incriminate either of them. A grin tugs at his lips. He is going to add his own letter to Eddie’s pile of birthday mail and maybe, for once, it will be enough.

“What are you smiling about?” Eddie asks him with a curious look.

“You,” Andrew answers truthfully.

Eddie chuckles and brushes his sweaty and unruly curls back self-consciously. “Oh, stop it. Let’s head back and get breakfast, shall we?”

“Sure.”

They take their time, walking back side by side along the beach and just enjoying each other’s company. Andrew can’t imagine a better way to start a new year and it’s a huge improvement to last year when they landed on New Britain. He looks forward to spending every morning with Eddie like this, should their training exercises allow it. He doesn’t know how much time they have left on Pavuvu but he wants to make every minute count.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As feared I haven't been able to update the last two weeks because I was on vacation and I'm sorry for that. I hope this fluffy chapter makes up for it. It has some explanation for Eddie's birthday present he got on Okinawa from Andy in "The Sound of Voices Two". There'll be more of that once we reach the Okinawa arc in this story here which isn't too far off, so stay tuned ;)


	25. Pavuvu - Late February 1945

**25\. Pavuvu - Late February 1945**

It’s late in the afternoon and they’re sitting in Andrew’s tent after a long day of training exercises. While Andrew is reading a book his mother sent him earlier that month Eddie lounges next to him on his cot with his guitar in his lap, strumming a melody absentmindedly. It’s something he could get used to, Andrew thinks, pausing in his reading. There’s a quiet peacefulness to the moment and more than once Andrew finds himself focusing more on Eddie’s nimble fingers instead of the words he’s supposed to be reading.

“You’re staring,” Eddie teases him with a soft smile when he catches him looking.

Andrew puts the book down. “Guilty as charged.”

“What’s got you so fascinated today?” Eddie asks, voice filled with amusement. “You’ve seen me play countless of times by now. Surely it’s not that exciting anymore.”

“To be honest,” Andrew says, “I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of watching you play. You make it look so effortless and it’s absolutely mesmerizing.”

Eddie huffs out a laugh. He stops his playing and looks at Andrew. “Do you want to learn?”

Andrew’s eyes widen. “Oh no, I’d just break it, I’m sure.”

“Nonsense,” Eddie says, handing him the guitar before Andrew can do so much as protest. “She survived the rains of Cape Gloucester and the rats of Pavuvu. I’m sure she’ll survive you.”

Andrew grips the guitar awkwardly and looks at it skeptically. “I’m not so sure about that,” he mutters.

Eddie simply rolls his eyes. “Just relax, Andy. Here, put her on your leg and hold her like this.”

He takes hold of Andrew’s hands and carefully places the left one on the neck and the right one on top of the strings. Andrew can feel his hands sweating as he tries very hard not to grip the guitar too firmly.

“And now?” he asks helplessly.

Eddie chuckles. “Now I’m going to teach you a simple chord. Just put your second finger here on the second string from the top in the second fret and your third finger on the string below it.”

Andrew carefully follows Eddie’s instructions and tries to place his fingers on the strings without breaking them. His fingers already feel cramped as he tries to push the two strings down.

“Now, strum the strings with your other hand,” Eddie gently instructs.

Andrew lets his thumb slowly brush against the strings and winces. “That doesn’t sound right.”

Eddie’s laughter fills his tent. “You need to apply more pressure with your left hand and really push the strings down. Like this.” He places his fingers on top of Andrew’s and presses down. “Now, try again.”

Andrew does and this time a soft, melancholic sound fills the air between them. He looks up at Eddie in wonder. “I did it!”

Eddie nods at him with a proud smile. “Told you you could play. That was an E minor chord you were playing there, by the way.”

“Do minor chords always sound so … sad?” Andrew asks, trying out the chord again.

“On their own, yes,” Eddie tells him. “Just as major chords sound happy. But when you combine them, it depends on more than just the chords whether your song sounds uplifting or depressing.”

“Seems pretty complex,” Andrew comments.

“It is,” Eddie agrees. “Mama spent a lot of evenings teaching us the finer points of music theory. Not all of us were happy about it, mind. Some of my siblings don’t share my Mama’s love for music as much as I do.”

Andrew looks down at the battered guitar in his hands. It’s obvious the instrument has been handled a lot in its lifetime. He can spot a fair share of marks and signs of use.

“Is this why your Mama gave you her guitar?”

Eddie’s eyes widen in surprise before they soften as he smiles. “How did you know?”

Andrew points to two very small initials that have been carved into the wood a long time ago. “A. J. stands for Alice Jones, right?”

Eddie nods. “It was my father’s wedding present for her,” he explains softly. “I learned to play on this guitar. Mama gave it to me when I enlisted so that I’ll always have a part of them with me. I didn’t want to take it because it’s the only guitar we have and it means the world to her, but she insisted, saying she could always use my grandfather’s instead.”

Eddie’s voice trails off as he reaches out to touch the initials on the side of the guitar.

“Your mother must love you very much,” Andrew observes quietly.

Without thinking he lifts his right hand to touch Eddie’s and doesn’t notice that his thumb is stuck beneath one of the strings until it’s too late. There’s the sound of a snap and Andrew looks down at the guitar in shock and horror.

“Oh god, I broke it,” he whispers. He raises his eyes to meet Eddie’s. “I am so sorry, Eddie! So, so sorry. I can’t believe I broke your Mama’s wedding present. Shit, you should’ve never let me hold it.”

To his great surprise, Eddie starts laughing.

“This is not funny, Eddie!” Andrew tells him, not understanding what’s going on. “I just broke your guitar!”

“You didn’t break it, Andy,” Eddie says with an amused smile. He takes Andrew’s right hand into both of his and placing a quick kiss to Andrew’s knuckles. “You just broke a string. That happens more often than you’d think.”

Andrew looks down at the useless string. “It’s still broken,” he says guiltily.

Eddie chuckles. “But it can easily be fixed with a new string. Don’t worry about it.”

Carefully, Andrew puts the guitar away to the side. “I feel awful,” he murmurs.

Eddie laughs again and leans his head on Andrew’s shoulder for a short moment to hide his mirth. His breath tickles Andrew’s neck. “If you feel so bad about it, you can pay for a new set of strings when I order some.”

“Of course,” Andrew says at once. “Please tell me you have some left and can fix it?”

He feels Eddie nod against his neck. “I do.” He raises his head and his eyes are full of warmth when he looks at Andrew. “Really, Andy, don’t worry about it. It happens. I don’t even remember how many strings I broke when I started out. In time you’ll learn how hard you can tug at the strings without breaking them.”

Andrew shakes his head. “I think we should just stick with you playing and me admiring from a safe distance from now on. You may forgive me for butchering your guitar, but I’m pretty sure your Mama won’t appreciate it.”

“Several of her kids tried their hands at playing this guitar,” Eddie reminds him with an amused smile. “Believe me, Mama’s used to seeing her guitar treated in every way imaginable. She won’t be angry at you for trying to learn and neither will I.”

Andrew finally reaches for Eddie’s hand to squeeze it. “It’s just … I know this guitar means a lot to you, Eddie,” he says, trying to make Eddie understand. “It’s a part of you, in a way, and I want it to be safe. I need it to be safe, just like I need you to be safe.”

Eddie’s eyes soften. “I know,” he says quietly. “Maybe we can try again when this is all over? Mama is teaching Jeannie how to play right now, perhaps you could join in?”

There’s an amused twinkle in Eddie’s eyes that makes Andrew forget his guilt over the broken string for a moment. “You just want to see me fail next to a preschooler.”

Eddie laughs. “Jeannie’s already mastered some of the main chords and can play some simple songs. You wouldn’t stand a chance.”

“I’d never stand a chance against a Jones with an instrument, I’d wager,” Andrew says.

“And you don’t have to,” Eddie tells him with a fond look. “I already like you very much as it is.”

Andrew can barely contain his smile. It’s as much of a declaration of love as one of them can manage here. “Even despite my faults?” he asks teasingly.

Eddie shakes his head and his smile is just as wide as Andrew’s. “More like _because_ of your faults.”

It’s almost ridiculous how happy those words make Andrew. He gives Eddie’s hand another squeeze before he stands up. “Come on, let’s get your guitar fixed.”

“Actually,” Eddie says, allowing himself to be pulled up by Andrew, “I think it’s time for chow. The guitar can wait.”

“But -“ Andrew wants to argue.

Eddie interrupts him. “No buts. She can wait, my stomach can’t. I’ll pick her up later and fix her tomorrow.”

With those words, Eddie tugs at his hand and pulls him out of the tent. He lets go the moment they’re outside and Andrew already misses the warmth of Eddie’s fingers in his. The smile Eddie sends him over his shoulder more than makes up for it, though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you guys enjoy the last chapter set on Pavuvu. Beginning with the next chapter the rest of the story will be set on Okinawa. I can't believe we're already down to the last ten chapters. Two still need to be written and then I better start on the sequel, right? ;-)


	26. Okinawa - Early May 1945

**26\. Okinawa - Early May 1945**

He wakes to the sound of soft singing. It takes him a moment to realize that it’s Andy’s voice quietly singing _Happy Birthday_ in his ear. Eddie’s eyes open in surprise. He listens in wonder and catches Andy’s gaze as he finishes off the song with a last, slightly off-key note and smiles at Eddie. It’s the most beautiful _Happy Birthday_ he’s ever heard in his life.

“You sang for me,” Eddie says with a shake of his head. He smiles at Andy in disbelief. “You hate to sing.”

Andy shrugs and smiles up at him shyly.  “Only for you, Eddie. Happy birthday.”

“Thank you, Andy,” is all Eddie can think of to say. He feels oddly touched that Andy who can’t hold a note to save his life would sing for him, just because he knows it will make Eddie happy. No one’s ever done something like that for him before.

“So, how does one feel at 28?” Andy asks him after a moment of silence.

Eddie thinks about that. How does he feel? If he’s honest with himself he doesn’t feel any different than he did yesterday. They’re still on Okinawa, still sitting in a foxhole, still fighting the Japanese. Nothing much has changed in the last few years that Eddie’s been in this war. It’s always the same, always another island, another battle.

He decides to tell Andy the truth. “Exhausted, wet, homesick … business as usual, I guess.”

“Just as I thought,” Andy says with a gentle smile before his hand reaches into his pack. Eddie has no idea what he’s looking for but suspects it has something to do with his birthday.

“Now,” Andy continues with a grin, “I can’t have my best lieutenant feeling like that on his 28th birthday, can I? That’s why I’ve got a present for you.” Curiously Eddie looks at the stack of papers that Andy produces from his bag. “I had a feeling we’d be back in combat by the time of your birthday,” Andy continues to explain, “so I wrote your mom and asked her to have your friends and family write your birthday letters a little early and send them straight to me, so I can give them to you today as a surprise. Surprise!”

Andy is grinning up at him as he hands him the letters. Eddie looks down at them, carefully holding them and brushing his thumb over the familiar handwriting of his Mama. Unexpectedly, he feels his eyes welling up and presses the letters close to his heart.

“I- I don’t know what to say,” Eddie whispers helplessly, knowing his voice is all choked up. “Thank you, Andy.”

He’s surprised when Andy wraps his arms around him and pulls him into an embrace that’s warm, comforting and feels so much like home that Eddie can do nothing but hold on and hope that this moment lasts forever. He buries his head in Andy’s shoulder as Andy tells him about how he wishes that there was more he could give Eddie. Eddie knows that because he feels the same, but he doesn’t need a big birthday cake like Andy suggests. Having Andy by his side is more than enough and he hopes and prays every night that Okinawa won’t take him away from him.

“Go on, read them,” Andy encourages him after they break apart.

Eddie’s fingers are shaking as he opens the first letter. It’s from his Mama and Papa. With every word he reads he feels how much they love him, how much they miss him. For a moment he closes his eyes and imagines his parents’ arms around him and his Mama laughing softly in his ear. He hasn’t heard their voices in nearly four years now. It feels like a lifetime. He can barely remember how they sound.

The letter of his parents is followed by letters from all his siblings and friends from home. He’s surprised to find a letter from his youngest sister Jeannie as well since she can’t write yet. A grin tugs at his lips as he finds a drawing instead of a letter in the envelope and holds it up for Andy to see.

“She’s quite the artist,” Andy comments softly. “How old is she now?”

“Just turned six a month ago,” Eddie tells him, gazing fondly at the drawing. “She’ll be going to school soon. She couldn’t even hold a pencil right the last time I saw her, much less draw anything.”

The second-to-last letter is from his whole family and Eddie shares a confused look with Andy as he opens it. Instead of a letter there is a photograph inside. He stares down at the faces of his past. His whole family is there, old friends and teachers from school, neighbors and even the postman Eddie’s accompanied more than once on his tours when he was younger. His parents are holding up a sign that reads _Happy birthday, Eddie!_ They’re all smiling up at him with bright eyes and happy faces that look a little older than he remembers them.

Unconsciously Eddie brushes his thumb gently over their faces. “I miss them,” he whispers into the quiet morning air of Okinawa. Andy’s gentle hand on his arm tells him that Andy understands, that he’s here and Eddie is beyond grateful for that.

Taking a deep breath, he puts the photograph back into the envelope and turns to the last letter. He stops when he recognizes Andy’s handwriting.

“Why?” he asks, a little confused and not knowing what to expect.

“Because there are some things I can’t say out loud, not yet,” Andy explains. He seems to be slightly embarrassed as he looks at the letter Eddie holds tightly in his trembling hands. “Things you deserve to know, Eddie. Also, I didn’t know if I’d make it this far, so I wrote this just in case.”

Eddie closes his eyes briefly and nods. Not making it – that’s something he tries very hard not to think about. It’s a possibility, they both knew this when they decided to stay, but it’s not something they ever talked about. That Andy took precautions to ensure that Eddie would get to know what he couldn’t say out loud shows Eddie that Andy’s just as worried about this battle as he is.

With shaking hands Eddie opens the letter and begins to read.

_My dearest Eddie,_

_We have known each other for three years now. To me it feels as if I’ve known you all my life. The moment I met you I knew we could be great together and good for each other. I had no idea how true that was. You believed in me from the start, were always confident I could and would make the right decisions when the time came. I didn’t know how much I needed that unwavering support until you gave it to me, just like that. I don’t think I ever told you how much that meant to me. I never told you a lot of things and I don’t want this to be my biggest regret should something happen to me._

_I love you._

_That’s the most important thing you need to know. I love you with all my heart and no matter what happens, what the future holds, that will always be true. Never doubt that. I can’t imagine a future without you by my side. You hold my heart and I have no intention of ever taking it back. As long as you’ll have me I will be by your side, always._

_You are what gets me through the days here, did you know that? When a day is bad, when I doubt myself, when I lose someone, I only need to look into your eyes and know I’ll be alright. Your beautiful, impossibly blue eyes. I could get lost in them, sometimes nearly did at a debriefing or when we shared dinner in the mess tent. You’re absolutely mesmerizing and you don’t even know it. I love that about you._

_I’ve always wondered when you fell in love with me. Was it in Melbourne? Or was it later? I was intrigued the moment I met you, became infatuated when I heard you laugh for the first time and I fell for you on my birthday in Melbourne, when I was drunk out of my mind and you came to take care of me. That was the first time you sang for me, just for me, and even though I don’t remember much else of that night, this is something I will never forget. You promised me a dance that night, too, if I remember correctly. A waltz. I dream about that, sometimes. You, me, soft music and an empty room where we can dance in circles until the sun comes up._

_I dream about a lot of things, when it comes to you. I dream about going home, and home isn’t Massachusetts anymore. Home is your grandparents’ house that I’ve never seen before. Home is being close to your family. Home is where you’re happy. And that’s all I want for the rest of my life: making you happy. I can’t wait for the day when I can hold you in my arms and tell you how much you mean to me._

_I love you, Eddie, and I wish you a very happy birthday._

_With love,_   
_Allison_

Eddie blinks and feels the tears falling from his eyes. The letter is beautiful, saying everything he’s wanted to hear for so long. He’s never told Andy how difficult it is for him to keep his feelings locked away, to not know how Andy feels exactly. And yet somehow Andy knew and managed to banish most of Eddie’s doubts and insecurities with a few written words.

He traces Andy’s second name gently before he wipes his tears away and looks up at the man who turned his life completely upside down three years ago. Eddie wants to give back, wants to reassure Andy that he feels the same, but it’s difficult to form the words.

“Me too,” he whispers finally and reaches for Andy’s hand to hold it tightly, hoping Andy understands. “God, I wish I could tell you-“

“There’ll come a time,” Andy says gently and stops him before Eddie can say too much. Eddie offers him a small smile. “And I know, Eddie. You tell me in so many ways, every day. Believe me, I know.”

Andy squeezes his hand reassuringly and Eddie nods, believing him. He holds Andy’s gaze for a moment, drinking in the love that Andy’s eyes can barely contain, before he lowers his head and rests his forehead against Andy’s shoulder. The moment he closes his eyes the tears well over and he’s unable to stop them when Andy wraps his arms around him and leans his head against his. He’s so overwhelmed by the letters from his family and the written proof of Andy’s love that all he can do is cling to Andy and hold on tight until the storm passes. Andy’s hand is gently stroking through the curls at the nape of his neck and the motion is so soothing that Eddie is tempted to let his eyes stay closed and fall back asleep.

Duty calls, though, and after a moment of savoring having Andy so close he forces them open and brings some distance between them. Self-consciously he wipes his hands over his face to get rid of the tears. Andy’s shoulder nudges him gently, telling him it’s okay.

“Ready to face the day?” he asks.

Eddie’s fingers trace the edges of the letter in his hands and he finds himself smiling up at Andy with a happiness and contentedness he hasn’t felt in a while.

“More than ever,“ he tells him. Gathering up his letters, he holds them out to Andy. “Would you hold onto them for a little while longer? I still haven’t managed to scrounge up a new bag.”

Andy’s smile is soft when he takes them into his hands. Their fingers brush. “Of course.”

“Thank you,” Eddie says softly, holding Andy’s gaze and trying to put all that he feels into that one look. “For everything. It means so much to me.”

He feels Andy’s fingers squeeze his shoulder. “You are very much welcome, Eddie. Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the Okinawa arc and the beginning of the end of this story ^^ We start off with a chapter that we've already seen from Eugene's POV in "The Sound of Voices Two". I hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> Just a quick heads-up: I won't be able to update next Saturday since I'll be attending a conference and will only be back the week after that.


	27. Okinawa - Mid May 1945

**27\. Okinawa - Mid May 1945**

A few days ago he saw a baby being blown up in the arms of a mother so very desperate to save her child. Today he found a baby miraculously surviving a direct artillery hit in a destroyed hut with his family dead around him. Fate can be cruel that way, Eddie thinks. One baby dead, one alive, as if someone rolled a dice and decided fate just like that. He knows he will never forget either of them.

Looking down at the little baby boy in his arms Eddie can’t help but think of home Andy walks away in search of a corpsman. He remembers holding his baby sister Jeannie like this. She would latch onto his thumb just like this baby boy who’s name he’ll never know does right now. It’s this little gesture, if nothing else, that sends a fierce longing for his own family through him. He hasn’t seen them in so many years that he’s started forgetting things like the smell of his mother’s perfume or the sound of happy laughter around the dinner table. Only their faces remain to him and even those have changed. He loves the new family picture his mother included in her birthday letter but at the same time it makes him painfully aware of just how much time has passed since he’s last seen them all. All his younger siblings look so different now, especially little Jeannie who was just a toddler when he last saw her and will be starting school this year.

He’s missed a lot, he realizes while gazing down at the sleeping child in his arms. But he’s gained a lot as well, Eddie thinks as he watches Andy cross the field with one of headquarter’s corpsman at his side. As much as he loves and misses his family, his love for Andy goes even deeper. Right now Andy is caked in mud and looks utterly exhausted as he crosses the road, and he still somehow manages to take Eddie’s breath away. Eddie hopes with everything he has that this will never end, that Andy will always have this effect on him.

“Time to let him go,” Andy tells him in a low, gentle voice once he and the corpsman reach him.

Eddie’s the first to admit that it’s utterly ridiculous that all his protective instincts scream at him to cradle the baby closer instead of giving him away. War is no place for a child. Just a few days ago he’s seen what war can do to a baby and if he never witnesses something like that again it will be too soon. Still, it’s hard for him to hand the baby over to the corpsman.

Andy must see something in his face, because he says in a soft voice that tugs at Eddie’s heart, “He’s got two young kids at home. He promised to find a good family for him.”

Eddie hopes that last part is true even though he finds it hard to believe. There are so many families on the run with barely enough to get by themselves without taking on a stranger’s child. He knows the little boy they found is not the only orphan and most likely won’t be the last. Okinawa’s orphanages must be overflowing, he realizes suddenly, sadly, as he gives the child away.

A tug on his dirty sleeve brings him out of his thoughts. Andy’s looking at him with a soft, understanding smile and carefully pulls him down next to him into their foxhole. Night is settling in over Okinawa, but Eddie can’t bring himself to stop staring after the corpsman and the baby even though both of them are long gone by now.

He doesn’t even realize he’s shivering until Andy wraps an arm around his shoulder that provides both comfort and warmth. Without thinking about it Eddie leans into the touch and lets his eyes fall close with a sigh.

“I hope he’ll have a better future,” he says quietly into the night. “God, I haven’t wanted to go home so badly in a long time.”

It’s something Eddie normally doesn’t admit to Andy. He knows that Andy still harbors some guilt for making him fight another battle instead of going home and he doesn’t want to add to that. Right now, though, after everything that happened in the last few days, Eddie needs Andy. It’s as simple as that and he knows Andy gets it when he murmurs into Eddie’s curls, “I know. I know.”

Andy’s grip around him tightens and Eddie lets himself fall. He closes his eyes again and enjoys the closeness they so rarely share. Andy’s hands are warm where they touch his arms and Eddie soaks in the feelings of love and comfort. It’s not the same as being held by his mother or as holding his siblings in his arms, but it’s just as good in a different way. By now the feel of Andy’s arms around him is familiar from stolen moments on the battlefield or in Andy’s tent on Pavuvu and he buries his head into Andy’s shoulder to catch a hint of the smell that is hidden beneath all the mud and so uniquely Andy.

He feels Andy press his forehead gently into his curls. “Can I do anything to help?” he murmurs softly.

Eddie’s lips curl up in a tired smile. “You’re already helping.”

He can hear and feel Andy’s quiet chuckle. “Must be my magical hands.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” Eddie mumbles fondly into Andy’s shoulder. In the darkness, he reaches out and allows himself a short moment of holding Andy’s hand. They can’t risk much more, not here, not where someone is always awake and seeing and hearing things. He lets go with a final squeeze and it’s not enough.

“You know,” Andy suddenly starts softly, “seeing you with that little boy today … you were amazing. No wonder your siblings adore you.”

“You weren’t so bad yourself,” Eddie tells him quietly. “You’ll make a great father one day,” he can’t help but add. It’s that lingering bit of doubt, a fear in him that still remains despite Andy’s letter to him - that one day Andy will come to his senses and choose a different, an easier life. A normal life.

Andy simply presses a kiss into his curls and pushes the doubts back with a quiet chuckle. “I’ll make a great uncle one day, perhaps.”

Eddie raises his head from his shoulder and searches Andy’s eyes in the darkness. “Are you sure you’re alright with that, Andy? Maybe you’ll think differently once you have other … options again.”

Andy scoffs at him and swats his arm. “Stop it, Eddie. I’ve made my choice and I sure as hell don’t regret it. Do you?”

Taken aback, Eddie shakes his head. He didn’t know Andy had similar doubts. “Of course not,” he tells Andy softly.

And that’s that. They don’t say anything more about it and Eddie lays his head back down on Andy’s shoulder and closes his eyes again. He knows it’s no use to worry about something that may never happen anyway. Andy may never get tired of him or, something Eddie tries very hard not to think about, he or Andy may not even make it home. He hopes very much that the last one won’t come true. He wouldn’t be able to bear it if Andy left him behind.

“You’re thinking too loud,” Andy murmurs into his ear then, but Eddie can hear the smile in his voice.

“Sorry,” he whispers back a little sheepishly.

“Try to get some sleep.” Andy’s arm tightens around him while his other hand reaches blindly for a blanket and pulls it over both of them.

Eddie repositions his head a little so that his nose brushes against Andy’s neck. “That goes for you as well,” he tells Andy softly. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed you getting up in the middle of the night to check on the boys.”

“Guilty as charged,” Andy admits with a chuckle. “I’ll do my best. Goodnight, Eddie.”

“Goodnight. Sleep well.” He pauses. “And thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for making you wait a little longer for the update. I came down with a nasty cold while I was attending a conference and only now feel well enough to work on my stories. I hope you enjoy this chapter!


	28. Okinawa - 25.05.1945

**28\. Okinawa - 25.05.1945**

“We’ve got to get him to the aid station, quickly. He won’t last long like this.”

Even after three days the words keep ringing in Eddie’s ears. _He won’t last long like this._ They haunt him every time he closes his eyes and tries to sleep, every time the battlefield is quiet, every time he’s got a moment to pause and think and remember. He remembers the paleness of Andy’s face, the pieces of shrapnel stuck in his neck and shoulder too close to the main artery and he remembers the blood that seemed to be everywhere. But most of all he remembers the touch of Andy’s hand against his cheek and the look Andy had given him. There was no pain in his eyes, only love mingled with sadness, and a small smile had graced his lips. Eddie knows it was supposed to reassure him but in that moment it had felt like goodbye. And then Andy’s eyes had rolled back until Eddie couldn’t see the blue of them anymore and he felt nothing but fear and desperation.

He remembers pleading with Andy, pleading with him to open his eyes again, to wake up, but Andy hadn’t. He’d stayed still and silent, slowly bleeding out in Eddie’s arms and Eddie’s never felt so helpless before in his entire life, not even after his father’s accident. They could have gone home and didn’t and now Andy was dying on some god-forsaken island in the Pacific. If Eddie regrets something in his life it’s not putting up a fight when Andy decided to stay.

When Doc Katz finally made his way to them everything happened so fast that Eddie didn’t even have time to say goodbye. Within a moment of analyzing the situation Doc Katz had Andy taken to an aid station and Eddie was left behind. The next minutes were a blur. Eddie only remembers the hollow feeling inside of him, the way his heart had ached when Andy vanished into the rain of Okinawa. He has no idea how he managed not to break down then and there. Somehow he’d found the strength to take command and to get the company reorganized. He made sure their wounded and dead were taken care of and that the rest of his men were safe in their foxholes, watching the lines.

The next thing he recalls clearly is the loneliness of his foxhole. For the first time since being assigned to King Company he sat in his foxhole alone. The rain was pouring down on him and suddenly he couldn’t keep the tears at bay any longer. Grief washed over him like a summer storm and he didn’t know how to stop it. Andy was gone, might not make it, and all his worst nightmares were suddenly and terrifyingly real in the darkness of Okinawa. He couldn’t close his eyes without seeing Andy, couldn’t stop the tears or the sobs that left him gasping for breath. That night was the worst night of his life and he only found a few precious minutes of sleep because he cried himself into exhaustion.

That was three days ago. Three days of living a nightmare and getting next to no sleep. Three days without any news of Andy’s fate. It became a routine for Eddie to phone his superiors at Battalion CP several times a day, and every time they tell him they have no intel on Andy’s condition. He tries not to let that get him down, tries to hold out hope but his heart is breaking a little more each day and there’s a feeling of dread in his gut that won’t go away.

Looking at the phone in his trembling hand Eddie hesitates before calling Battalion CP for the third time that day. He knows they’re getting sick and tired of him, can hear it in the barely concealed exasperation in the voice of whoever answers him, but he doesn’t care. He’ll phone them for as long as he needs to, until they have answers for him.

“Is this about your C.O again?” the man on the other hand answers irritably when Eddie’s call goes through.

Eddie recognizes the voice from earlier calls and grinds his teeth together to stay calm. “Yes. Captain Haldane. K Company. Wounded three days ago.” He’s tired of repeating the same words over and over again.

There’s a long-suffering sigh on the other end of the line. “Let me check the casualty lists. Again,” the Marine adds pointedly. A moment later he goes on in a bored voice, “You’re in luck. New list came in an hour ago. Your captain’s on it. He’s listed as KIA. Sorry.”

The phone falls out of Eddie’s hand and his heart stutters in his chest before it breaks, quietly and with a finality that leaves him reeling and gasping for breath.

Andy is dead.

There’s a rushing in his ears as his eyes stare at nothing at all. He tries to comprehend what he’s just been told.

Andy is dead.

His chest feels tight and hurts so much he can barely breathe.

Andy is dead.

He lost the best thing in his life and he didn’t get to say goodbye. Even worse, he didn’t get to tell him, _I love you_. Andy died without ever having heard those words and suddenly Eddie can’t breathe.

Andy is dead.

A moment later Doc Katz appears in front of him and frames his face with both of his muddy hands, talking insistently at him but Eddie can’t understand a word. Everything around him is muted in pain and Eddie is drowning in it.

Andy is dead.

Doc Katz grips his shoulders and shakes him roughly, forcing Eddie to meet his eyes. “Snap out of it!” his voice commands. “You have to breathe!”

Eddie gulps and listens, always a good Marine. He takes a deep breath.

“That’s it, Hillbilly, that’s it. Keep breathing,” Doc Katz tells him softly as Eddie takes one hard, difficult breath after another. His chest hurts, or maybe it’s his heart.

“Andy’s gone,” Eddie whispers harshly between two breaths. His eyes fill with tears and he looks away in shame. He’s King’s new C.O. now and he’s not supposed to break down and fall apart like this, especially not in front of one of his men. They need a leader, someone they can trust and have confidence in. He can’t afford to break now, not with so many lives depending on him which is why he takes a steadying breath, trying desperately not to let the tears fall and pull himself together.

“I’m so sorry, Hillbilly,” Doc Katz tells him and pulls him into a hug and that’s all it takes to make Eddie’s resolve crumble.

He tries to be quiet as the pain pours out of him. It’s out of his control now and he sobs helplessly into his corpsman’s shoulder, trying desperately to stifle his grief and loss somehow. He’s clinging to Katz’s uniform as if it’s his last lifeline and Katz lets him.

“It’s alright. Just let it all out,” Katz mumbles into his ear. “You’ll feel better afterwards.”

Eddie knows he won’t and it makes him only cry harder. Katz has no idea who he’s just lost. Andy wasn’t just his captain, his C.O., his friend. Andy was his everything. He was his future in a small house with a dog. He was love and warmth and understanding. He was quiet smiles and broken guitar strings and walks on the beach. He was everything Eddie never knew he wanted or needed, and he is gone.

Andy is dead, and no matter how much Eddie wants to scream and cry no tears will ever bring him back. The finality of the situation hits him and he just stops. With the last bit of strength he has left Eddie puts on a brave smile as he brushes his tears away and pulls back from the embrace. “Thanks, Doc,” he tells Katz without meeting his eyes. “I’ll be fine now.”

Katz lets him go rather reluctantly. “Are you sure?”

Eddie nods, because what else can he do? Katz is a good corpsman but there’s nothing he can do or say that will help ease Eddie’s pain. To Katz and everyone else Eddie’s just lost his best friend. He can’t tell any of them how he truly feels. No one will ever know what he and Andy shared, what they felt for each other, or how hard Eddie’s heart used to beat when Andy smiled at him. His grief, as palpable as it may seem to them, will always be his alone to carry. And carry it he will for as long as he needs to until his boys are safe. He owes Andy that much.

“I’m afraid I’ve got more bad news for you,” Doc Katz begins hesitantly and Eddie closes his eyes to mentally prepare himself, almost glad to think about something other than Andy for a short moment. “I’ve decided to send Lt. Stanley to the aid station. The malaria’s gotten so bad he can barely stand.”

That brings them down to two officers. Eddie has no idea how he’s supposed to manage the company with only Lt. Loveday at his side. It’s not enough, and he’s very much aware of the fact that he himself is not really fit to lead anyone right now when he hasn’t slept in days and Andy’s pale face and last smile are all he can think about. He should hand the company over but he can’t do that to Loveday, can’t burden him with that much responsibility.

“Make sure Stumpy gets the rest he needs,” he tells Katz with a sigh as he opens his eyes again. “We’ll find someone to take his place.”

They both know they won’t, that there are no officers waiting in line, but Katz doesn’t mention it. He simply nods and with one last look that Eddie doesn’t return Katz stands up. Eddie watches him go, watches him urge Stanley to leave his post. Normally he would smile at Stanley’s stubbornness to stay, but right now he just feels empty and doesn’t have the energy to move his lips. There’s no one to share that smile with anymore anyway. His whole body is aware of the empty space next to him where Andy is supposed to be and aches with longing.

Blindly he fumbles for Andy’s bag and pulls his birthday letters out. His personal photos are kept together with them in the same plastic sheet and he rummages through them until suddenly he sees Andy’s face. Andy is looking at him in the picture and Eddie carefully, reverently traces the soft smile that Andy only ever had for him. The picture is almost two years old, but Eddie can already see the beginnings of Andy’s love for him in the fondness in his eyes. His throat closes up again as the realization hits him that Andy will never look at him like that again, and he swallows thickly, willing himself not to give in to the grieve.

With a last caress he puts the picture back into the plastic sheet where it’s safe. He thinks about pulling Andy’s letter out but decides against it because he knows it’ll be too much right now. Instead he puts the most precious possessions he has back into Andy’s bag and holds it close to his heart. He takes one deep breath, imagines Andy’s smile and soft eyes, and vows to himself that he will do his best to keep his boys safe because that’s what always meant the most to Andy. Eddie may be broken and beyond repair, but he can hold on long enough to lead their company through Okinawa until the end.

And if a stray bullet finds him along the way, well – it’ll only make him whole again.


	29. Okinawa - 29.05.1945

**29\. Okinawa - 29.05.1945**

Another day goes by and another day ends. The Japanese fire at them during the day and shell them at night and Eddie doesn’t even have the energy to be afraid anymore. He just sits in his foxhole or behind some rocks on the frontlines and waits it out. Ever since the day that turned his life upside down he hasn’t slept or eaten properly. The moment he closes his eyes he sees Andy, sometimes with a pale face and a kind smile, other times covered in blood and blaming him for not keeping him safe. Every time he comes awake with a gasp he throws up whatever meager ration Doc Katz forced him to eat the evening before. It’s a vicious cycle and he’s constantly tired and just so exhausted that it becomes increasingly difficult to find a reason to go on.

As he slowly walks back to their position behind the frontlines with his men ahead of him Eddie feels the combined weight of responsibility and grief coming down on him with every step he takes. His feet drag in the mud and he knows he’s trailing behind but every breath he takes is difficult and saps the energy out of him and it’s all he can do to keep walking and not crumble to the ground in defeat. He’s at the end of his rope here and only marching on because he doesn’t want to let Andy down.

He finally crosses the small ridge his men disappeared behind a moment ago and stops in his tracks. Against the setting sun a ghost sways a little unsteadily on his feet and smiles up at him so lovely that Eddie forgets how to breathe. He doesn’t think, just gathers all the energy he has left and starts running, hoping against hope that he’s not seeing things, that Andy is really there. He loses his weapon and his helmet along the way, but he doesn’t care and he doesn’t stop. Instead he runs faster, wills his tired legs to move more quickly and not slip in the mud. When he finally reaches Andy he almost expects to run right through him, but his arms wrap around a warm body and a steadily beating heart welcomes him home.

“Andy,” is all he can manage to choke out as he presses his face into Andy’s neck and breathes in the familiar smell that no picture and no letter could ever capture. “Oh god, Andy.”

“Hey, Eddie,” is all Andy says as his arms come up to shelter Eddie from the storm that’s been raging within him for six days now. God, how he’s missed this. Warmth spreads through him for the first time in days and he revels in the feeling as his hands roam across Andy’s back, making sure that he’s whole and safe. It takes him a while to convince himself that this is real, that he’s not dreaming.

“You’re here,” he breathes out in wonder as he pulls back a little and looks up into the blue eyes that he missed so much. One of his hands cups Andy’s face and gently traces the curve of his cheekbone. “They said you were-,” he begins and stops with a frown. Unable to say the word out loud he mumbles instead, “I thought I’d never see you again, and now you’re here. H-how can you possibly be here?”

He’s so confused and overwhelmed by everything that he can’t stop the tears. But it’s okay now because Andy is back and he doesn’t have to be strong anymore. He allows himself to fall apart against Andy’s neck and lets all his grief, relief and love pour down his cheeks and into Andy’s uniform. When Andy’s hand comes up to his neck and his fingers tangle in the curls they find there Eddie only cries harder.

“I’m alright, Eddie, I promise you I’m alright,” Andy whispers and holds him tighter. “I’ve already heard what happened. CP got me mixed up with the captain from Love Company.” He swallows thickly. “I’m so sorry, Eddie. God, I’m so sorry I put you through this.”

Eddie presses his nose closer to Andy’s neck. “Doesn’t matter know,” he murmurs between sobs he can’t quite stifle. “You’re here. Just, stay with me.”

He’s so immensely grateful when Andy does. Wrapped up in Andy’s arms the reality of the past six days vanishes and only Andy’s warm, solid body remains. Eddie can feel Andy’s heart beating slowly and steadily through his uniform and it’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard. He focuses on that wonderful heartbeat until it’s all he can hear. His mind is blissfully numb in a good way and he doesn’t feel empty anymore, only tired.

“Eddie?” Andy’s quiet voice pulls him away from the sweet nothingness of sleep that is calling him.

“Mhm?” is all he manages to breathe out. His eyes are closed against Andy’s neck.

“How about we settle down for the night, hm?” Andy murmurs into his ear. “I think you could use some rest.”

Rest sounds heavenly but the last thing Eddie wants to do is move away from Andy. He wants to savor this moment, wants to keep his eyes closed in case this moment does turn out to be a wishful fantasy in the end. “I’m not the one who’s hurt.”

He hears Andy sigh into his hair and knows his time is up. “Well,” Andy says and Eddie forces his eyes open, “I’m pretty tired, too, and could use some sleep.”

Eddie gaze strays to the white bandage that is wrapped around Andy’s neck and wonders how much it still hurts, how close Andy came to losing his life that day. He hates himself a little for not thinking of Andy’s wounds at all and disentangles himself from the embrace, albeit reluctantly. The foxhole next to them is empty and Eddie doesn’t care one bit who it belongs to because Andy’s face is a little too pale for his liking and Andy needs to rest, now.

Carefully, he helps Andy get comfortable before he sits down next to him with a bit of distance between them, mindful of Andy’s injuries no matter how much it pains him not to be able to touch him.

“Eddie?” Andy whispers, catching his eyes in the darkness. “Come here.”

Andy knows him so well and Eddie’s eyes well up again as he scoots closer and curls himself against Andy’s side. He grips the front of Andy’s uniform tightly and feels the exhaustion of the last few days steadily creep up on him as Andy pulls a blanket around them both, sheltering them from the rest of the world.

Eddie closes his eyes and it’s the first time in days that he isn’t haunted by blood and regret. He allows his body to relax and hides his face once more in Andy’s uninjured shoulder. He feels safe.

“I thought I’d lost you,” Eddie murmurs, knowing he’ll fall asleep any minute now. The last few days have taken a toll on his mind and body and he knows he needs to rest if he doesn’t want to get send behind the lines by Doc Katz, but there is something he needs to tell Andy first because otherwise someone else will and Eddie needs him to understand. “Every day, I wished that someone would just shoot me, just so that it wouldn’t hurt anymore to think about you,” he admits quietly. “I didn’t want to die,” he stresses. ”I just didn’t want to live, if that makes sense.”

He hopes Andy gets it because his mind is so slow and sluggish right now that it’s difficult to find the right words.

“Oh, Eddie,” Andy breathes out and Eddie can hear his heart breaking in his voice. He didn’t want to make Andy sad, didn’t want him to feel guilty; he just needed him to know. Before he can apologize Andy says in a whisper, “We’re coming off the line in a couple of days, after we secure the area around Shuri Castle, and then all of this will be over. I can’t imagine them sending us into combat once more after that, not with the state the company’s in.”

Over. A few more days and all this will be over and Andy will be safe from straying bullets and shrapnel. Eddie breathes out a sigh of relief. “Does this mean we go home, Andy?” he asks without thinking.

He doesn’t expect Andy to almost immediately say, “Yes,” because for Andy the company always comes first. “I don’t care what happens next in this war, whether we’ll be invading Tokyo or not,” Andy goes on softly. “The two of us are definitely going home. I’m never putting you through this again.”

Eddie hears both the promise and apology in Andy’s words. He also hears the blame Andy puts on himself for all of this and that’s something Eddie can’t have, so he mumbles into Andy’s shoulder, “It’s not your fault. You know I’d follow you into another battle if you wanted to stay with King.”

He’s confused when Andy lets out a shaky breath and presses a kiss into his curls. “I know,” Andy tells him and Eddie can hear tears in his voice. “And that’s exactly why we’re leaving. I’m not going to drag you to some other wretched place no one’s ever heard of and put both our lives in danger.”

Eddie’s tired brain is even more confused. “But you care about the men,” he points out, not really understanding why Andy suddenly changes his principles.

“I do,” Andy agrees with him. There’s another soft kiss pressed into Eddie’s hair that sends shivers down his spine and feels like comfort and home. “But you are more important to me than any other person on this planet, Eddie. And seeing you like this – this war is not worth it. It’s not worth jeopardizing our future any longer just because I feel guilty about leaving the men.” He sighs heavily. “For the last three years I’ve always put the company first and you second, and you never complained, not even after Peleliu when I told you I wanted to stay. You simply stayed with me and that was that. Coming to Okinawa was a mistake and I’m not about to make the same mistake again. This is me finally putting you first, putting _us_ first. We’re going home, Eddie.”

Eddie’s breathing stutters and his heart starts to beat furiously in his chest again. Andy’s never been so open about his feelings before, at least not vocally. There is the letter Eddie got for his birthday that was carefully crafted and meant to reassure. Now Andy is all raw emotion and pure love, and they’re going home because Eddie comes first now. It’s a brand new feeling for him, being put first, and there is only one possible way to reply to this.

“I love you,” he whispers into Andy’s ear just as the Japanese open up on their left flank. It feels good to finally say the words.

“Me, too, Eddie,” Andy tells him and it feels even better hearing them said back.

With a sigh, Eddie closes his eyes again and for once doesn’t fight sleep as it comes to claim him. Andy’s arms are warm and strong around his shoulders and if Eddie listens closely enough he can hear Andy’s heartbeat underneath his ear. The comforting sound lulls him to sleep within seconds and he finally rests.

Eddie doesn’t know how long he’s been asleep, but he suddenly startles awake with the image of blood on his hands. For a moment he is unable to breathe as his mind comes to terms with what’s real and what’s not. A look to the side reassures him that Andy is still there and Eddie tries to take a breath, but his throat closes right back up when he shifts his gaze to his hands. They still look like they have blood on them and even though he knows that it’s not real, that Andy’s safe beside him, his mind insists that it’s Andy’s. For a moment all he can do is stare at his hands before desperation and the urge to get the blood off take over. He rubs roughly at the skin and tries to get his hands clean with his fingernails. It doesn’t work. He’s utterly exhausted and tired of nightmares and frustrated with himself and just wants it to stop.

“Eddie?” Andy murmurs next to him as he’s slowly waking up.

Eddie doesn’t want him to see, feels ashamed that he can’t control this, so he swallows the tears and panic back down and hushes Andy gently. “Go back to sleep.”

Even to his own ears his voice is shaking miserably and of course Andy picks up on it immediately. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Eddie tries to reassure him, looking down at his hands. They are covered in mud and it looks so much like blood that every breath he takes is painful and too fast. Desperately he scratches at his hands to get it off.

“You’re scratching your hands bloody,” Andy states softly and turns Eddie’s head back to look at him, away from the blood. “Tell me what you see?”

His voice is so soft, so understanding and so gentle that Eddie finds himself swallowing his shame while still rubbing at his fingers. “Your blood is on my hands,” he whispers shakily. “Every night, and no matter what I do it’s never enough. I can’t get it to stay off.”

“Let me help?” Andy asks quietly. He waits for Eddie to nod before he pulls Eddie’s dirty hands into his own and massages them gently. “Let’s wash it off together, shall we?”

He opens his water bottle and pours a generous amount over both of Eddie’s hands, getting his trousers wet in the process. Eddie can only silently watch as Andy wipes all the blood, all the mud away with gentle fingers until Eddie’s hands are pale and clean again.

“See any more blood?” Andy asks him and Eddie mutely shakes his head. “Good,” Andy says with a small smile and continues touching Eddie’s hands from the backs up to the fingertips. The motion is so mesmerizing that Eddie feels his eyes droop. Gently, Andy guides his head back onto his shoulder. “Don’t worry,” he whispers, “I’ll keep the blood away. You just rest.”

Normally, Eddie’s unable to get back to sleep after a nightmare. But Andy’s gentle touches and quiet promise allow him to find the courage to close his eyes again.

“I’ll be here when you wake up. I’ll always be here,” Andy tells him quietly and Eddie falls asleep to the sound of his soft breaths, the gentle beating of his heart and the loving touches of his fingertips against his hands. He sleeps through the rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for keeping you waiting after the last chapter. What with finally printing my dissertation and being away the whole weekend I totally forgot about preparing this chapter. But here we go. I'm glad a lot of people seemed to like the last chapter and I hope you like this one just as much since we finally get to see Eddie's side of his reunion with Andy.


	30. Okinawa - 04.06.1945

**30\. Okinawa - 04.06.1945**

Eddie’s mind is blissfully blank as he watches the sunset from the open flap of his tent. Behind him rain clouds approach from the East and every now and then thunder rolls across an orange-tinted sky. It’s beautiful, peaceful and chaotic at the same time. As a boy he used to love watching thunderstorms from the window of his room. Now he’s just glad that for once he’s a got a tent to keep him dry and a cot to sleep on.

The last few days have been trying. Not just for him, for everyone. The whole company is in a disastrous condition and morale is at an all-time low. They’ve been on Okinawa now for two months. Two months filled with constant fighting, constant fear and constant loss. He’s tired of it all and for the first time in his life he knows what “battle-weary” and “battle fatigue” truly mean. Never for a moment did he think there’d come a time when he’d have to apply these terms to himself, yet here he is at the end of his rope with nowhere left to go. Okinawa brought him down and with every step he feels like he’s losing his own personal battle a little more.

The days when he thought Andy was dead were the darkest moments of his life, filled with grief, heartbreak and constant nightmares. Then Andy miraculously came back and for a short while everything felt right again. But the nightmares didn’t stop and his mind keeps going back to the night his whole life changed. No matter how exhausted he feels every night is filled with Andy in pain, sometimes dying in his arms, sometimes dying too far away to reach, and every time he wakes with the feeling of blood on his hands. It’s been going on for so long now that he sometimes wonders if it will ever stop.

Maybe tonight, Eddie thinks wistfully as the sun slowly disappears from sight behind the clouds. They’re finally off the line and get a break from fighting. He doesn’t know how long their period of rest will last, but he hopes with all his heart that command won’t send them back into the thick of things again. King has lost so many men that they’re barely functioning and the ones that are left standing look dead on their feet. As for himself, Eddie’s not sure he’s up for even one more day of constantly fearing for Andy’s life. He needs this break from fighting and a chance to come to terms with everything that happened if he ever wants to feel at peace again.

“Hello you,” Andy’s quiet voice interrupts his thoughts. Eddie looks up as he steps around the tent. “I’ve been searching all over for you. What are you doing out here all alone?”

Eddie gazes up at him, takes in the healthy color of Andy’s cheeks and the softness of his eyes, and manages a small smile. “Watching the sunset.”

Andy’s eyes move briefly towards the horizon before he looks back at Eddie and raises an eyebrow in amusement. “You know, you were supposed to meet me for chow,” he remarks and pointedly holds out a bowl of soup for Eddie.

“Sorry,” Eddie says rather sheepishly and gratefully takes the offered food. “Just got lost in my thoughts, I guess.”

Andy sits down next to him and clutches at his heart theatrically. “Do you have any idea how humiliating it is when your date doesn’t show? Second platoon looked at me with barely concealed pity.”

“Really?” Eddie asks him around a mouthful, trying to imagine second platoon as Andy’s wingman.

Andy laughs and shakes his head. “No, they were too busy devouring their chow to notice old forlorn me.”

One side of Eddie’s mouth pulls up in a grin. “That sounds more like them. Still, I’m sorry for not showing. Anything I can do to make it up to you?”

“Actually,” Andy says mischievously, “I believe there’s a promise I have yet to fulfill, even though you don’t really deserve it after standing me up in front of the kids.”

Eddie has no idea what Andy’s talking about. “Huh?” he asks rather eloquently as he finishes the last of his soup and places the bowl on the ground.

“Remember the massage earlier?” Andy reminds him with a smirk.

Of course Eddie remembers that. Andy’s hands on his tense shoulders felt magical and for a moment he’d forgotten where he was and given in to the feeling. He also remembers Andy’s promise to resume the massage later.

“You were serious about that?” he asks Andy in surprise.

Andy rolls his eyes at him. “Of course I was. So get off your ass and into your tent so I can get to work.”

Eddie’s so surprised and shocked for a moment that he simply does what Andy tells him to do and goes inside, empty bowl forgotten on the ground. He stands in his tent a little awkwardly and turns around to look at Andy. “Um, and now?”

“Now,” Andy tells him patiently, “you take off your shirt, sit down and relax.”

The whole situation suddenly feels very intimate and Eddie can’t take his eyes off of Andy as he tries to unbutton his shirt. His fingers fumble at the second button and Andy takes a step closer.

“Let me,” he murmurs quietly and unbuttons the rest of Eddie’s shirt with steady fingers. Eddie is aware of every place Andy’s fingers accidentally touch and he feels goosebumps spread across his skin as Andy pulls the shirt down his arms and allows his thumbs to brush against Eddie’s collarbones in the process.

There’s a soft smile on Andy’s face when he asks, “Alright?”

Eddie nods and offers him a smile in return. “Yes. I’m just not … used to this,” he admits quietly while gesturing helplessly between them.

Andy shrugs and his smile turns bashful. “Me neither.”

They stare at each other quietly for a moment before they both start to laugh. The tension between them dissipates and Eddie feels more at ease immediately.

“Come on, sit down,” Andy says and gently guides him to the cot.

“Do you really think this is a good idea?” Eddie asks even as he’s sitting down. “What if someone walks in on us?”

Andy waves his worries away and sits down next to him, gently turning him around so that Eddie’s back is to him. “Everyone’s tired, Eddie. They’re all glad for a quiet night of rest. And even if someone were to walk in, all they would see is me giving you a massage. Nothing wrong with that. You worry too much.”

I know, Eddie thinks quietly. He’s spent a lifetime worrying about this kind of thing. “What about you?” he asks instead. “Aren’t you tired and want to get a good night’s rest?”

Andy shrugs. “It’s still early. And my tent’s right next to yours, so it’s not like I’ve got a long way home. Now stop finding excuses and just relax.”

“Alright,” Eddie finally agrees with a nervous sigh. He looks up at Andy over his left shoulder in anticipation. “Ready when you are.”

Andy grins at him before he lays both his hands on Eddie’s shoulder blades. The warmth alone makes Eddie’s tired body relax and he lets his head hang. He has no idea how long it’s been since anyone’s touched him like this. It feels marvelous. Andy’s hands are gentle as they move across his back. At first they carefully map out the area before Andy finally digs his fingers into the tight knots that make Eddie’s shoulders ache. It’s painful at first but little by little Andy manages to loosen every knot until Eddie’s back is no longer tense but pliable and relaxed.

It feels so good that Eddie’s eyes close of their own accord. His mind thankfully shuts down and he simply feels and revels in the loving touches. It takes him a while to notice that Andy is no longer massaging his back but instead allowing his fingers to trace meaningless symbols onto his skin.

“What are you doing?” Eddie asks sleepily and glances over his shoulder.

A little shyly, Andy says, “Enjoying the view.”

His hands don’t stop moving. With his thumb Andy traces every freckle he finds on Eddie’s back before his fingers move up to Eddie’s neck and gently, almost reverently card through the blond curls of Eddie’s hair.

“Mhm,” Eddie sighs happily as Andy’s fingertips lightly scratch at the nape of his neck. “This is nice.”

He doesn’t notice Andy taking one of his hands away until it is placed on his side where the scar tissue from the wound he got on Peleliu is. Surprised he startles and flinches back.

“Sorry,” Andy murmurs and pulls his hand away. “Does it still hurt?”

Eddie shakes his head and turns his body around so he can better look at Andy. “Not really. Just wasn’t expecting that, is all.” He can see Andy’s eyes being drawn to the wound. “It’s not pretty, but you can touch it, if you want.”

Briefly, Andy’s eyes flick up to his own and he can see a whirlwind of emotions in them. A sad smile graces Andy’s lips as he carefully and so very gently traces his fingers over the various scars that mar Eddie’s side.

“Scars don’t need to be pretty,” he says quietly, “and they’re nothing to be ashamed of.”

Eddie lowers his eyes to the ugly web of scar tissue that is as big as his hand and hasn’t faded a bit since Peleliu. A warm hand on his cheek makes him looks up again.

“You survived. I have, too. That’s what matters,” Andy tells him insistently, and Eddie’s eyes are drawn to Andy’s shoulder where a piece of shrapnel almost ended his life. Andy’s eyes follow his gaze and he sighs. Carefully, he takes one of Eddie’s hands in his and tenderly brushes his thumb across the palm where a fine scar is barely visible. “I don’t mind any of them, because they all show how much we can withstand, how much we can heal,” Andy adds quietly and places a soft kiss to Eddie’s palm.

The gesture is so loving that Eddie feels his eyes mist over. He thinks about the scars his body bears and the open wounds the war left on his soul that keep bleeding and bleeding and won’t stop hurting, no matter what he does. He wants to be at peace again and has no idea how to accomplish that.

“Sometimes, it all feels too much,” he confesses quietly and lowers his head. “Every step I take is one too many and I just want to lie down and rest, but I can’t. I think I’ve forgotten how to heal, Andy.”

Two warm gentle hands come up to clasp the back of his neck and a moment later Andy’s forehead is pressing against his.

“I know,” Andy whispers into the space between them. “I hate to see you like this and I feel so damn helpless and angry because it’s my fault and there’s nothing I can do to make it better.”

“But you are,” Eddie tells him quietly. He opens his eyes. “Every time you hold my hand, every time I hear your heartbeat, every time you smile at me and tell me it’s alright helps. I’m sorry I never told you. I should have. You help so much.”

There’s a small smile on Andy’s face as he brushes his thumbs across the skin below Eddie’s ears. “I wish there was more I could do,” he sighs. “It doesn’t seem enough. I want to see you smile again, like you used to. I miss your smile.”

Andy’s gaze falls to Eddie’s mouth, but no matter how hard Eddie tries he doesn’t manage more than a half-hearted quirk of his lips.

“We’ll work on that,” Andy tells him confidently and his smile is bright despite Eddie’s failure to do something as simple as smiling. “You just need a little more time and we finally have that now. We’ll figure out a way to help you.”

Eddie nods slightly. “I should probably talk to the Doc,” he suggests quietly and a little reluctantly. “Maybe he’ll know what to do.”

“Good idea,” Andy agrees. “Whatever you need, just tell me and I’ll do my best to make sure you’ll get it. You’re not alone in this, Eddie, okay? I’ll be with you every step of the way and if there’s anything I can do to help, don’t hesitate to ask.”

Stay, is what immediately comes to Eddie’s mind. He doesn’t want to be alone with his nightmares tonight. Andy’s the only reason why he gets some measure of sleep at all, why he sometimes can fall back asleep after a bad dream. But it would be too dangerous, Eddie’s mind tells him. Someone could walk in on them, see them in a compromising position and tear them apart forever. One miscalculated risk could ruin both their lives and he would never forgive himself if he brought Andy down with him. Andy can’t stay, no matter how scared Eddie is to let him go, no matter how much he wants Andy to be with him, how badly he needs to be able to hear his breathing and feel his heartbeat when the nightmares wake him up with the afterimages of blood on his hands.

Andy must see something on his face because his eyes soften and he asks quietly, “What is it?”

Eddie lowers his eyes to his hands which are holding onto the fabric of his trousers tightly. “It’s stupid,” he begins, shaking his head. “Your tent is right next to mine but … I get nervous just thinking about you being over there and not here.”

“It’s okay,” Andy tells him quietly. His voice is so full of understanding that it makes Eddie’s heart ache. “I don’t usually stay over after I’ve been stood up on the first date, but I’ll make an exception just for you.”

Andy’s teasing is so unexpected that it startles a huff of a laugh out of Eddie. Andy is beaming at him. “There is that beautiful smile I’ve been missing.”

He brushes his thumbs once more over Eddie’s skin before he lets him go. “I’ll go get my cot, then.”

Eddie silently watches him leave. He presses his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them, wondering what he’s ever done in his life to deserve to be loved by someone like Andy. He has no idea how Andy does it but with a few well-placed words and a little humor he’s made Eddie feel better, just like that. He still marvels at it when, a moment later, Andy is back with his own cot and blanket and places it right next to Eddie’s with a smile.

“Storm’s about to hit,” he remarks as he settles down on his cot and faces Eddie. Eddie can hear the first raindrops hitting the ceiling of his tent. “What a shame. Now I’m stuck here.”

The mischievous glint in Andy’s eyes teases another small smile out of Eddie. “I guess you are.”

He turns to lie on his side and locks eyes with Andy. For a moment they just look at each other. Then, Andy’s hand reaches out and takes Eddie’s in his. He touches each finger from top to button and traces the path of every single tendon across the back of Eddie’s hand. The motion is so mesmerizing that Eddie feels exhaustion creep up on him and his eyes begin to droop.

“You look tired.” Andy’s whisper almost gets lost in the thunder that rolls across the sky over their heads.

“I am tired,” Eddie tells him softly.

“Then sleep,” Andy says quietly into the darkness. “Just let go. I’ll be here.”

With one last look in Andy’s sincere eyes Eddie allows his own to fall close. Despite the thunder he can hear Andy breathing next to him. He feels the warmth of his hand where it still traces patterns onto Eddie’s palm. It’s not enough to keep the nightmares at bay, not yet, but it’s still good and it helps ease his mind. Instead of worrying about everything and nothing he concentrates on the feeling of Andy’s thumb and lets it guide him to sleep.

He’s been asleep for three hours when the nightmares come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Five chapters left to go! I can't believe we've almost reached the end. I probably should start working on the sequel after finishing my Pacific Big Bang story, huh? *g*


	31. Okinawa - 05.06.1945

**31\. Okinawa - 05.06.1945**

“Hey, Doc, can I talk to you for a second?”

After another night with too little sleep and a panicking Eddie who looked at him with wide, scared eyes that break Andrew’s heart a little bit more each time he sees them Andrew knows they can’t put it off any longer to seek help. He’d thought getting off the line would be enough to put Eddie’s mind at ease but last night made it obvious that it’s not. It’s been a week since Andrew came back to his company and instead of getting better Eddie only gets worse. Andrew still remembers the look of utter disbelief, hope and heartbreak in Eddie’s eyes when he realized Andrew wasn’t dead. He also remembers how thin and fragile Eddie had looked with the dark bruises underneath his eyes, only a shadow of the man Andrew fell in love with once upon a time ago in sunny Melbourne.

Now, a week later, Eddie still looks like a gust of wind can push him over. All those nights filled with nightmares followed by frantically trying to scrub away imaginary blood from his hands have taken their toll, and with each night Andrew’s worry grows. Eddie should be getting better because Andrew is right there next to him and makes sure he eats properly and always stays close and tries not to put himself in any unnecessary danger as much as possible but by now it’s become obvious that it’s not enough. Andrew has no idea what else he can do despite hold Eddie in his arms and tell him he’s okay. It pains him to see Eddie suffer night after night like this, knowing that it’s ultimately his fault because he’s the one who wanted to stay and fight another battle, and now Eddie’s paying the prize for it and Andrew knows he’ll never forgive himself for that.

“What can I do for you, Skipper?” Doc Katz asks him with a friendly smile as he deposits his empty bowl of chow on the counter of the mess tent. “Are your wounds troubling you?”

Andrew shakes his head and grabs Katz by the arm to take him aside so they can’t be overheard. “I’m fine. It’s Eddie I’m worried about.”

A knowing look passes over Katz’s face. “I can’t say I’m surprised to hear that,” he admits quietly. “Hillbilly is treading a fine line since you got wounded, sir. It hit him pretty hard.”

“I know,” Andy says with a sigh. It’s the understatement of the year. “The thing is, he’s not getting better, and we wondered if you could help.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Katz says. It doesn’t sound promising and Andrew knows there’s only so much a corpsman can do in a situation like this since Eddie’s pain isn’t physical. He also knows that, normally, any other corpsman would have taken Eddie off the line days ago. That’s what usually happens when people can’t deal with combat anymore, for whatever reason. Get them behind the lines, allow them a couple of hours or days of rest away from the fighting and in the end, some of them are fit for combat again. Eddie’s case is different, though, and Katz knows them well enough to realize that. He’s the only one Andrew trusts enough to go to for help. 

When Andrew and Katz reach Eddie he is sitting quietly in front of his tent, looking at the horizon with tired eyes. He offers Andrew a small smile when he spots him, but his body tenses when he sees Doc Katz right behind him and for a moment Andrew wonders whether he should have talked to Eddie before bringing the Doc with him, though it had been Eddie’s idea in the first place.

“I brought the Doc over so we could talk,” Andrew explains as Eddie slowly stands up to greet them. “I hope that is alright.”

Eddie shrugs with one shoulder. “It’s fine.” He glances at Katz. “We better get inside, then.”

They step into Eddie’s tent and Andrew’s cot is still placed right next to Eddie’s. Katz’s eyes takes in the arrangement but he doesn’t comment on it as Andrew pulls his cot a bit away so Katz can sit comfortably across from them. Andrew takes his seat right next to Eddie.

“So, how do we do this?” Eddie finally asks. Andy can see he’s nervous, can tell by the shaking of his voice and the way his hands are clenched tightly in his lap. He looks weary and resigned.

Katz sends him a comforting smile. “However you want to, Hillbilly. Maybe you could start by telling me what exactly the problem is?”

Eddie takes a deep, steadying a breath before he begins to explain. “I can’t sleep,” he admits quietly. “I stopped sleeping properly when Andy – I mean, Captain Haldane was hit.”

“It’s alright, you can call him whatever makes you comfortable,” Katz reassures him with a smile. “I know you’re close.”

Andrew doubts that Katz knows just how close they really are, but doesn’t say anything. Eddie nods gratefully at Katz.

“I have nightmares,” he goes on, staring back down at his hands. “I thought they’d stop when Andy came back but they haven’t. I can’t sleep through the night without waking up in panic and most of the time I can’t go back to sleep.”

“What are the nightmares about?” Katz asks and Eddie’s cheeks heat up in flame.

“Andy,” Eddie confesses quietly. “They’re always about Andy. I see him die again and again and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. Every time I wake up it’s with the feeling of his blood on my hands and I have to wash them and scrub it off.” As if to prove his point he holds out his hands for Katz to see. They’re red and flaky from the excessive scrubbing. “I know there’s no blood there,” Eddie tries to explain with a nervous huff of a laugh, “but I can’t help it. They feel sticky and dirty and I need to clean them.”

Carefully, Katz takes hold of Eddie’s hands and inspects them from all sides. “Do they hurt?” he asks.

“It’s better than the feeling of blood,” Eddie mumbles, quietly confirming both Andrew’s and Katz’s suspicion that all the scrubbing is taking its toll.

Katz lets go of Eddie’s hands to rummage through his med bag. He puts a small tube into Eddie’s hands. “Put this on your hands at least three times a day, preferably every time they start to itch and burn. It will keep them moisturized.”

“Thanks, Doc,” Eddie says, placing the lotion next to him on the cot.

“Now, about your nightmares,” Katz goes on. “What did you already try?”

Andrew looks at Eddie who’s clearly uncomfortable with that question. He doesn’t meet either of their eyes and hunches over a little, trying to make himself small. Andy’s chest tightens at the sight.

“I’ve stayed close to him since I came back,” he explains so Eddie doesn’t have to, shifting his attention back to Katz. “We maintain body contact and sleep next to each other. Hearing my heartbeat helps when he wakes up from a nightmare.”

It’s kind of incriminating what he says but Katz has to know everything so he can properly assess the situation and Andrew trusts him to be professional about this and keep any thoughts he may have about them to himself.

“Can you talk him down after a nightmare?” Katz inquires and Andrew is relieved that he doesn’t question what Andy just told him.

“Sometimes,” Andrew says with a nod. “Most times he’s too shaken to go back to sleep but on some occasions he calms down enough to try only to be awoken by more nightmares later.”

“I just can’t stop thinking about that moment,” Eddie admits quietly next to him. “The more I try not to think about it, the more my mind keeps going in circles. It’s gotten so bad that I’m scared of closing my eyes because I know what’ll happen.” He looks up at Katz in desperation. “And the thing is, I know Andy’s not … not gone. I know it just as much as I know there is no blood on my hands but that doesn’t change the fact that I lose him every night anew and I’m terrified of that.”

Andrew hates how ashamed Eddie looks as he admits that. He wants to reach over and take his hand in his but he can’t, not with Katz around, so he settles on briefly rubbing Eddie’s back in reassurance.

Katz looks at them both quietly for a moment before he seems to come to a decision. “I think,” he says slowly, “that part of the problem is that you expect the nightmares by now. Like you said, you know what’s going to happen and because of that your mind isn’t able to rest. Add to that the fact that Captain Haldane got wounded while you were asleep and you probably feel guilty about that it’s no surprise that sleeping terrifies you.”

Eddie looks at him dejectedly. “I’m just like those guys counting Japs or digging holes with their bare hands, aren’t I?”

“In a way,” Katz agrees with a kind smile and Andrew wants to hate him for his honesty. “I’m not going to lie about that. I should have taken you off the line when I noticed what losing Captain Haldane did to you. But, to be honest, you’re a damn fine officer, sir, and the company needed you. You didn’t let your grief affect your work and you have my highest respect for that.” Katz lays a comforting hand on Eddie’s forearm and waits until Eddie looks at him before he continues. “And that’s what distinguishes you from the guys counting Japs: you didn’t let it overcome you, and I think you needed to keep your mind busy.”

Eddie nods faintly. “It’s too quiet off the line,” he tells them. “Too much time to think. The company kept me going.”

Katz nods at him. “That’s what I figured. And while I hoped that Captain Haldane’s return would make it easier for you to come to terms with everything that happened, it’s alright that it hasn’t. There is no magical cure for something like this and sometimes only time can heal.”

Eddie’s face falls and he looks down at his battered hands.

“But,” Katz continues, “there is something we can try. Since we’re off the line right now I’m going to give you something that will help you sleep. It won’t make your fears go away, but it will allow you to fall asleep easier and, most importantly, give you a good night’s rest for once. With a little bit of luck all your mind needs is to be reminded that nothing awful has to happen when we sleep.” He searches through his bag and hands Eddie a small bottle with a couple of pills in them. “I want you to take one each evening half an hour before you go to bed. One, not more, alright? They will make you drowsy, so don’t take them when we’re back on the line.”

Andrew eyes the small pills. “Are there any side effects?”

Katz shakes his head. “Nothing major, apart from the drowsiness I mentioned. Maybe some nausea, but that shouldn’t be so bad.”

“You really think this might work?” Eddie asks in a small, quiet voice. 

Katz offers him a smile. “I think it’s worth a try,” he phrases carefully. “I don’t know if it will work. But if nothing else it will allow your body and mind some much needed rest.”

“Thanks, Doc,” Eddie manages with a small smile.

Katz pats his arm encouragingly. “We’ll talk again tomorrow, alright?”

Eddie nods and Andrew stands up to accompany their corpsman outside.

“Thanks, Doc,” he says, shaking Katz’s hand.

“Nothing to thank, sir,” Katz tells him. “You’re not the only one who’s worried about him. Let’s hope a proper rest will do him some good.”

With a nod Katz leaves and Andrew steps back into the tent. He finds Eddie staring at the pills.

“You alright?” he asks, finally reaching for Eddie’s hand and threading their fingers together.

Eddie looks at him gratefully. “Honestly, I don’t know,” he replies. “It felt weird talking about this with someone who isn’t … you.” His anxious eyes meet Andrew’s. “I feel like we’ve said too much.”

Andrew squeezes his hand and shakes his head. “Katz is a good man, Eddie. You don’t need to worry about him on top of everything else, okay? Let me do the worrying for once. You just focus on getting better.” Eddie’s eyes soften as Andrew places a gentle kiss on the back of his hand.

“I’d better take a pill, then, huh?”

It doesn’t take long for Eddie’s eyes to start to droop. He’s been exhausted for days and Andrew’s not surprised that the sleeping pill shows its effect almost immediately. Gently, he guides Eddie’s head down and pulls the blanket over him. Pushing his own cot closer, Andrew lies down as well and reaches once more for Eddie’s hand.

“Don’t fight it,” he tells Eddie quietly. “I’ll be here, no matter what.”

He sees a flicker of fear in Eddie’s eyes just before they fall close and Eddie’s breathing evens out. Gently, he keeps running his thumb over the back of Eddie’s hand. It hurts him to see Eddie reduced to this, to someone who’s scared to close his eyes, and he hopes that the Doc is right and some nights of well-deserved rest will help Eddie’s mind to find some peace.

With one last look at Eddie’s tired face Andrew lets his eyes fall close.

When he opens them again, sunrise is filtering through the fabric of the tent. For a moment he’s confused because over the last week he’s always woken up to darkness and frantic movement next to him. It takes him a moment to realize what this means and when Andrew looks over at Eddie a smile pulls at his lips. Eddie’s eyes are still closed and he’s breathing regularly, a peacefulness to him that Andrew hasn’t seen in some time.

One look at his watch tells Andrew it’s just past eight. He’s slept for ten hours straight, he realizes with a jolt. His company will have had breakfast by now and wondering where they are. He doesn’t care, though, not when Eddie’s slept through the night without nightmares for the first time in days. Nothing matters compared to that, and even though Andrew doesn’t fool himself into thinking that this is the end of Eddie’s problems, he knows it’s a step in the right direction.

When Eddie wakes up half an hour later Andrew smiles brightly at him and gently pushes the curls from his eyes. “Good morning, sleepyhead.”

Eddie’s answering smile is blinding.


	32. Okinawa - 14.06.1945

**32\. Okinawa - 14.06.1945**

The sleeping pills help, just like Doc Katz thought they would, but they don’t work wonders. Eddie gets more sleep and the nightmares don’t come quite as often but they don’t stop. There are still nights that leave Eddie so shaken that he can’t stop scrubbing imaginary blood from his hands until Andrew gently washes them with water and holds them for the rest of the night. Eddie’s not fine, not by a long shot, but he’s getting better and the dark circles under his eyes are a little less dark now, so Andrew counts this as a win and is cautiously optimistic.

Then he gets the orders that send them back into the fight. King Company is so low in numbers that Andrew had thought the battle for Okinawa was over for them but he was wrong. He can barely look Eddie in the eyes when he tells the men, feeling like he failed him.

“I guess that means I won’t be taking these anymore,” Eddie mumbles quietly as he holds up the nearly empty bottle of sleeping pills. They’re in his tent packing up his things, trying to hold onto what little time they have left before shells start falling around them again. “Maybe it’s for the best. I can’t rely on them forever.”

Andrew feels helpless as Eddie pushes the pills into his hands and continues packing the rest of his things into his bag. His few personal possessions are packed with such tender carefulness that a lump forms in Andy’s throat. “I’m sorry, Eddie.”

Eddie doesn’t look up at him or pause in his packing. “You already said that, Andy,” he points out.

“I know!” Andrew exclaims helplessly. “But I feel like you’re shutting me out here and I don’t know what else to say or how to make this better!”

This time, Eddie freezes. A moment later his shoulders sag and he sits down heavily on his cot. “I’m sorry,” he whispers before he hides his face in his hands. “I don’t mean to shut you out,” he says, voice slightly muffled. “That’s the last thing I want.”

“Then talk to me,” Andrew pleads.

Eddie drops his hands and looks up at him in quiet defeat. “I don’t know how,” he admits. “There’s nothing new to tell, Andy. You already know what’s wrong with me.”

Andrew hates it when Eddie talks like this about himself. He wants to tell him that there’s nothing wrong with him even though they both know it’s a lie. Every time he sees Eddie like this, so beaten down and crushed, he feels utterly powerless and would give anything to take Eddie’s pain away.

“It’s just,” Eddie goes on quietly, “I didn’t think we’d have to go back and I didn’t expect it to hit me quite so bad, to feel like this.”

Andrew kneels down in front of him and gathers Eddie’s hands in his. “Feel like what?” he asks, looking up at him.

“Feel like I can’t breathe,” Eddie whispers. “Feel like I’m a second away from panicking. Feel like I’m going to lose you in the blink of an eye. It always comes down to that, Andy. Always.”

“I know,” Andrew says, pressing a soft kiss to Eddie’s hands.

“It scares me sometimes,” Eddie admits in a low voice, “how much I … need you, how much my life depends on you. The thought of you being out there again makes me almost physically sick. You’ve been lucky twice now and I’m terrified your luck may run out.”

Andrew’s chest tightens at the barely held back pain in Eddie’s voice. His sight goes blurry and he grips Eddie’s hands tighter, willing not to let the tears fall. “You know I can’t promise you everything will be alright,” he begins, wishing things were different, “but I can promise you I’ll do everything I can not to put myself in any more danger than we’re already in. I won’t go on any patrols or scouting missions. I will stay behind and take no unnecessary risks.”

They both know that doesn’t mean he’s going to be safe from straying bullets or vicious shelling, just like he hadn’t been the last time he got wounded. Still, when Eddie raises his eyes he looks at Andrew like he’s the single most marvelous being in the world.

“You would really do that?” he asks in a quiet voice. “I know you, Andy. You like to lead by example, not by staying behind.”

“I’d do anything for you,” Andrew whispers without having to think about it. In the quiet of the tent it sounds like a promise. “There’s nothing I can do about our situation but if I can make it just a little more bearable for you than I will do whatever it takes. I meant what I told you the night I came back from the aid station. You come first now. You always should have.”

For a moment Eddie simply stares at him. His eyes roam over Andrew’s face, followed by his hands and his touch is so gentle that Andrew’s heart aches. Then Eddie cradles Andrew’s head and leans forward until their foreheads touch and they breathe the same air. Andrew’s hands come up to rest on Eddie’s arms and with every second they stay like this Eddie calms down a little more until he’s breathing just as slowly as Andrew.

“Thank you,” Eddie finally whispers into the silence.

“Always,” Andrew whispers back, knowing it’s too little too late and wishing he’d put Eddie first before all this happened to them. He leans back a little to look Eddie in the eyes. “We just have to get through a couple more days. I don’t think we’ll be out there for more than a week. It’s almost over, Eddie.”

Eddie nods, taking a deep breath. “One week. What’s one more week after four years, hm?”

He tries to put on a brave smile. It’s a little shaky at the edges but Andrew doesn’t mention it. He marvels at Eddie’s strength, wondering if he would be as courageous in the face of walking straight into his most terrifying nightmares.

There’s a soft knock on the frame of the tent and, with some regret, Andrew lets go of Eddie. He turns around to find Doc Katz peering in through the flap.

“Just wanted to see how you were doing, sir,” he says by way of greeting.

Eddie motions for him to step inside. “As well as can be expected.”

“Not very well, then,” Katz says with a kind smile and Eddie huffs out a quiet laugh. A little more serious he says, “I’m here for the sleeping pills. Not that I don’t trust you, sir, but better safe than sorry, right?”

Andrew hands him the bottle. “No need to worry, doc. Eddie would never put the company at risk like that.”

“Good man,” Katz says appreciatively. “Anything else I can do before we’re off?”

Andrew shakes his head, but Eddie hesitates. “Actually, speaking of putting the company at risk, there is one thing,” he says, pushing the last items into his bag and closing it. “Should anything happen to Andy I need you to take me off the line, or at least appoint someone else as company leader. I barely kept myself together the last time. I don’t think I could handle it if it happens again.”

Eddie’s voice is dead serious and Andrew can’t help admiring him for his courage even though he is absolutely certain that Eddie would manage to see King through to the end. Next to him, Doc Katz’s eyes soften and he squeezes Eddie’s shoulder.

“I have no doubt in your abilities, sir,” he tells Eddie honestly and Andrew’s glad that he and Katz are on the same page here. “Should anything happen I’ll be right by your side and help you as much as I can. And if it’s in the best interest of the company to send you off the line I will do that. You have my word.”

“Thank you,” Eddie says and the tension drains out of him.

Katz offers him a smile and nods at Andrew before he leaves. Andrew turns back to Eddie.

“Ready to go?”

“No,” Eddie says, but there’s a small smile on his face.

“Well,” Andrew says, “we should otherwise all the best foxholes will already be taken.”

It has the desired effect because Eddie lets out a quiet huff of a laugh. “We wouldn’t want that, would we?”

Andrew picks up Eddie’s bag and holds it up so Eddie can slip his arms through the straps. “No, we wouldn’t. I was thinking of a nice big muddy foxhole with a lovely view over some destroyed buildings or maybe a rice paddy.”

“Sounds lovely,” Eddie says dryly. “I know what you’re trying to do, you know?”

Andrew feigns innocence. “And what would that be?”

“You’re trying to lighten the mood and get my mind off of what may happen,” Eddie says. He rolls his eyes. “And before you ask, yes, it’s working.”

“Good,” Andrew says with a grin and reaches for Eddie’s hand to give it a last reassuring squeeze before they head out of the tent. “Like you said, something may happen. The future is not carved in stone, Eddie. Let’s both just try our best and with a little luck in about a week we can start making plans for the future.”

“The future,” Eddie’s voice trails off and his eyes become unfocused for a moment. There’s a small smile tugging at his lips. “I like the sound of that.”

“Me too,” Andrew admits.

They walk out into the open area between the tents and wait for the rest of their company to arrive. Together they board some trucks that take them South to Kunishi Ridge. They arrive in the early hours of morning and the sky is still dark with rain clouds. All of them are tired and dig in for the rest of the night, trying to get comfortable in some pool of mud or another. Eddie managed to find a somewhat dry spot for him and Andrew and Andrew gratefully sits down next to him once he’s made sure his company is organized. Star shells light up over their heads and the sound of mortar fire sends shivers down his spine. After almost two weeks of rest the sounds of war are more jarring than he’d anticipated.

“Do you want to try and get some sleep?” he asks Eddie.

“I don’t think I can,” Eddie admits, pressing closer against Andrew’s side.

Andrew didn’t expect anything else. Still, he tries once more, “How about you just try and I’ll wake you in two hours? That way we both get a little sleep before we move up onto the ridge tomorrow.” He lowers his voice to a whisper. “Put your hand on my chest.”

It’s a familiar routine by now. As much as Andrew wants to he can’t wrap his arms around Eddie right now – not because he’s afraid someone might see them, but because they don’t know if Japanese soldiers are likely to come at them at night. He needs to have his hands free. Instead Eddie rests his head on his shoulder and his hand in the middle of Andrew’s chest, right above his heart. The slow, steady rhythm always helps reassure Eddie that Andrew is still there. With the hand not holding his weapon Andrew pulls a blanket over Eddie and watches as Eddie’s eyes flutter close. He’s a little surprised when Eddie’s breathing actually evens out despite the sounds of battle all around them and the lack of sleeping pills. He must have been more exhausted than he let on.

After two hours Andrew wakes him as promised. They share a quiet smile before Andrew settles down on Eddie’s shoulder and get’s what little sleep he can before the sun rises. Morning comes sooner than he’d like and with more rain clouds than he’s comfortable with. Blearily he looks up at the ridge they have to climb today.

“This looks an awful lot like the Umurbrogol,” Eddie says quietly next to him, staring uneasily up at the coral rocks above them.

Images flash through Andrew’s mind. Eddie getting shot. Eddie on a stretcher. The stretcher bearers losing their footing, causing the stretcher to topple over and saving Eddie’s life in the process. He remembers his heart beating furiously in his chest and the helplessness he felt in that moment. Then there’s the sound of a shot and he remembers his helmet being thrown off his head and falling backwards. He remembers being on a stretcher and the world moving around him with an uncomfortable speed. But most of all he remembers Eddie’s face at the aid station, the devastation, fear and relief plain as daylight, the sight of the tears in Eddie’s eyes forever burned into his mind. He should have known then not to make Eddie go through this again.

“Andy?” Eddie asks, pulling him from his thoughts. There’s a frown on his face. “Are you alright?”

Andrew nods. “Just thinking about Peleliu.” He takes a deep breath. “Let’s make sure we don’t repeat the mistakes we made there.”

With that he stands up and offers Eddie a hand. They have a ridge to climb and Andrew will be damned if some sniper is going to put an end to what is only just beginning.


	33. Okinawa - 12.08.1945

**33\. Okinawa - 12.08.1945**

“Andy?”

With a groan Andrew forces his eyes open. His tent is brightly lit by the sun and he dimly realizes that it has to be past noon already. He must have slept through breakfast and that troubles him though he can’t remember why.

“Andy?” This time Andrew recognizes the voice through the fog in his head.

“Eddie,” he rasps out in a whisper.

A moment later Eddie pokes his head through the tent flap. His curls are highlighted by the sun, reminding Andrew of an angel, and just like that he knows there must be something wrong with him if he’s thinking funny thoughts like that. He pulls the blanket tighter around himself against the cold and almost misses the way Eddie’s eyes widen and all color drains from his face.

“Andy? What’s wrong?”

Despite his slow and sluggish thoughts Andrew still recognizes the panic in Eddie’s voice. It makes him want to sit up and reach out his hand to brush away the worry lines on Eddie’s face but he can’t. He’s shivering too much and barely has the strength to keep the woolen blanket wrapped around him. It reminds him of his father, of home and comfort

“Don’t worry,” is all he manages to mutter.

Eddie crosses the distance between the entrance and Andrew’s cot in record speed. “Don’t worry?” he repeats incredulously, sitting down on the edge of the cot.

Andrew blinks up at him blearily. “I’m just cold,” he explains, trying to keep his teeth from chattering.

The worry in Eddie’s eyes increases. “It’s 80 degrees outside, Andy,” he points out quietly. With a hand that is shaking slightly, Andrew notices, Eddie reaches out and carefully places it on Andrew’s forehead. Andrew can barely feel it and he knows that’s not a good sign.

“You’re burning up,” Eddie says after a moment, unable to hide the panic in his voice. “I’m going to get Doc Katz. Don’t move.”

With one last glance to Andrew Eddie hurries out of the tent and Andrew allows his eyes to fall close, feeling exhausted. He doesn’t know how much time passed until someone starts shaking him and telling him to wake up.

“Hey, Doc,” Andrew greets Katz drowsily. He can see Eddie standing anxiously behind him. “Hello, Eddie. Were you here earlier?”

Eddie and Katz share a glance that Andrew can’t quite decipher before Katz offers Andrew a small smile. “How do you feel, Captain?”

Andrew shrugs and tugs the blanket higher. “Cold.”

“I can see that,” Katz tells him. “Hillbilly tells me you’re burning up.”

“Just cold,” Andrew repeats, wishing Katz had brought some blankets with him.

Katz huffs out a laugh. “Alright, let me be the judge of that.”

Andrew is too tired to argue. He lets Katz take his temperature and listen to his breathing. By the time Katz is finished Andrew is shivering so badly that he can’t stop his teeth from chattering.

“Hillbilly’s right, you have a fever,” Katz finally says. “I think you’ve got yourself a case of malaria, Captain.”

Andrew groans. He hates malaria.

“But he took his antimalarials, Doc. How can that be?” Eddie asks, chewing his bottom lip in worry.

Katz pats Eddie on the shoulder in comfort. “As far as I know Captain Haldane came down with malaria before. Is that correct?”

“Guadalcanal,” Andrew manages to whisper. “It was awful. Shivering and sweating for days.”

“Right,” Katz says. “So, either it’s been dormant this whole time or it’s a new infection. Either way he’s got it. By the looks of it it’s only the beginning. The chills will be followed by a high fever which will result in sweating, just like he said. And then it begins anew. I’m sure you both know the drill by now.”

Eddie sinks down on the cot next to Andrew, his whole body sagging. “So, we give him pills and try to cool him down?”

“That’s it,” Katz confirms. “Nothing more we can do. It just has to run its course.” When he sees Eddie’s anxious expression he adds, “I’m sure he’ll be fine in a couple of days.”

“Thanks, Doc,” Eddie tells him wearily. Something about his voice allows Andrew to find the strength to reach out until his hand brushes against Eddie’s leg. Eddie’s smile is small when he looks down at him.

“Call me if he gets worse,” Katz says, handing Eddie some pills.

He leaves and for a moment Eddie simply stares at the small bottle in his hand.

“Eddie?” Andrew whispers. Eddie blinks and turns towards him. “I’m not dying.”

It seems important that Eddie knows that even though Andrew can’t really remember why. He knows he did the right thing when Eddie lets out a choked laugh and reaches out to gently brush his thumb over Andrew’s cheek. It feels marvelous. “You better not be,” he whispers. A little louder he adds, “Come on, you’ve got to take one of these and then you can get some sleep.”

Dutifully, Andrew swallows the pill and drinks some water before he closes his eyes.

He drifts in and out of consciousness for the rest of the day. Soon the chills stop and he gets unbearably hot, kicking off the blanket and wriggling out of his uniform jacket in order to cool down. It’s only when Eddie places a cold, wet washcloth on his forehead that Andrew feels a measure of relief from the heat. Then Andrew feels his pants being pushed up his legs. Before he can wonder why Eddie would do that two more wet clothes are being wrapped around his calves and he sighs in relief and drifts off into unconsciousness once more.

When the sweating starts Eddie is there to gently wipe a damp cloth over his face and chest, again and again, tirelessly. Andrew barely manages to open his eyes to convey his thanks. It lasts until the middle of the night before Andrew can finally sink into a dreamless sleep.

In the morning he feels awful and cold when he wakes up. It’s not the freezing cold from the malaria chills as before and his thoughts are clear, but Andrew knows from past experience that this is not the end of the malaria attack. He’ll get a day of respite only for it to begin anew tomorrow. He absolutely hates malaria.

Looking around for the blanket he discarded yesterday during his fever Andrew is surprised to find Eddie asleep with his head pillowed on his arms on the cot. Eddie is kneeling on the floor in a position that must be terribly uncomfortable and he’s shivering slightly in the cool Okinawan morning air. Andrew’s heart clenches at the sight. Eddie looks exhausted and worn out and Andrew distinctly remembers the panic and worry in Eddie’s eyes when he found him yesterday.

Reaching out he places one of his hands gently on Eddie’s head and buries his fingers in Eddie’s blond curls. Andrew thought the end of the Battle of Okinawa would also be the end of Eddie’s fear of losing him but apparently he’d been wrong. He hates himself for putting Eddie through the same thing again and again even though he knows that this time it’s not his fault.

“This feels nice,” Eddie murmurs sleepily.

Andrew smiles softly at him. “I’ll gladly do this all day.”

The corner of Eddie’s mouth pulls up as well and for a moment neither of them moves.

“I think my legs are asleep,” Eddie mutters and raises his head. “Ow,” he hisses out as he moves his head gingerly from side to side to work out the kinks in his neck. Slowly, he pulls himself up from the floor and Andrew winces in sympathy when his back pops.

“You shouldn’t have slept on the floor like this,” Andrew tells him quietly.

Eddie just shrugs. “I wasn’t about to leave you to suffer through this alone.”

Andrew props himself up on his elbows and looks up at him softly. “You could have just brought your own cot into my tent.”

Eddie pauses in his stretching. “That’s … actually a good idea. Why didn’t I think of that?”

“Because you were sick with worry,” Andrew says gently, fondly. His chest tightens when Eddie turns away in shame. “I really appreciate you taking care of me, Eddie, but please go get your cot tonight, alright? This will take some time to pass and I don’t want you to sleep on the floor. You’re not as young as you used to be, you know?” he adds a little jokingly.

Eddie huffs out a laugh. “Neither are you.”

“True,” Andrew agrees. His eyes soften when Eddie smiles at him.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better, Andy,” Eddie tells him quietly.

“It won’t last,” Andrew warns him even though he knows that Eddie is very aware of that fact. They’ve both seen enough men being overcome with malaria in the last four years to know the course the disease takes.

“I know,” Eddie says solemnly and they leave it at that. “Are you hungry? Thirsty?”

Andrew thinks about it. “Thirsty yes, but I’m not sure I can keep anything down. I’m still feeling nauseous.”

“How about I’ll scrounge up some porridge and we’ll see if you can keep it down?” he suggests. “You’ve got to eat something, Andy.”

Eddie looks so hopeful that Andrew finds himself agreeing. He is willing to try anything as long as Eddie keeps smiling at him like that.

“Don’t forget to bring your cot,” he calls after him as Eddie leaves to get them some breakfast.

With a sigh he lets himself fall back into his pillow, wishing the next couple of days had already passed. He hates malaria.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only two more chapters to go!


	34. Okinawa - Late August 1945

**34\. Okinawa - Late August 1945**

Andrew’s finally back on his feet again after being incapacitated by malaria for the last few days. It had taken him the better part of a week to beat the infection into submission and even though he looks almost as thin as Eddie does nowadays Andrew is feeling full of energy and ready to do something – which is why he is currently standing alone in front of his mortar squad’s tent while Eddie is still asleep. He knocks quietly.

“Sir?” Sledge asks confused as he opens the door.

“Good morning, boys,” Andrew greets them with a smile.

Shelton doesn’t even bother getting up from his cot as he says, “Glad to see you back on your feet, skipper.”

“Glad to be up and about again,” Andrew acknowledges with a tilt of his head.

“Is there anything you need, sir?” Burgin asks, coming to stand next to Sledge.

“Actually, yes,” Andrew says. He turns to Sledge., “I heard that you acquired a kimono for your mother. Is that true?”

Sledge blinks at him. “Uhm, yes?”

“Mind if I borrow it?”

The looks on the faces of his mortar crew are almost comical. While Sledge is too surprised to say anything, Shelton isn’t. “You getting tired of your uniform, skipper?”

“You have no idea,” he tells Snafu half-seriously. Turning back to Sledge, he adds, “You’ll get it back by midday, I promise.”

“Alright …” Sledge says, still a little perplexed. He walks to his bag and rummages through it until he pulls out a blue silken kimono with dark and white stripes. Hesitantly, he holds it out to Andrew.

“Thanks, Sledge. You’re making Mama Jones very happy right now,” Andrew grins at him as he tugs the kimono safely beneath his arm. He salutes his boys and makes his way back to his tent, chuckling in amusement when he hears the sounds of Shelton’s laughter and Sledge’s confused mutterings behind him. “Mama Jones? What the hell is he talking about?”

Eddie is still asleep when Andrew steps into his tent. Even though Doc Katz has cleared him fit for duty yesterday Eddie hasn’t yet bothered to move back into his own tent and Andrew would be the last one to ask him to leave. He knows Eddie sleeps better when they’re close and if he’s honest with himself Andrew has gotten used to falling asleep with Eddie’s hand clasped in his. As long as they’re careful he sees no reason to stop.

Quietly, he holds the kimono behind his back and sits down at the edge of Eddie’s cot.

“Wake up, Eddie,” he whispers as he brushes some curls back from Eddie’s forehead. Eddie’s eyes slowly flutter open and he frowns up at Andrew. “Good morning.”

“Andy? How late is it?”

Andrew gently smoothes out the worry lines between Eddie’s brows. “Not too late yet, though I’m afraid we both missed breakfast.”

Eddie groans. “We’re supposed to set an example for the boys, you know? All this sleeping in really has to stop.”

Andrew chuckles and shakes his head. This isn’t the first morning Eddie’s complained about not being up with the sun. “I’m sure the boys are big enough to find their own way to the chow line. And besides, we both could use the extra sleep, don’t you think?”

“I wasn’t the one who was sick,” Eddie points out.

“True,” Andrew agrees. “But you were the one playing nurse which is just as exhausting. Now, how about you stop worrying about the boys and instead start guessing what I’ve got behind my back?”

Eddie’s eyes shift to Andrew’s left arm which is hiding the kimono. “Not breakfast, I presume?”

Andrew laughs. “Sorry, but I’ve still got some chocolate somewhere we could share later.”

“Deal,” Eddie agrees. He squints at Andrew’s left arm. “So, if it’s not breakfast … how about our orders to be shipped home?”

Andrew winces at Eddie’s hopeful tone. “Nope, though those should come through any day now.”

Eddie looks at him, trying not to seem too disappointed, and shrugs. “Then I’m out of ideas. Why don’t you just tell me what you’ve got there?”

“You’re no fun,” Andrew complains. When Eddie simply rolls his eyes at him Andrew gives in. With a grin and a flourish he presents Sledge’s blue kimono to Eddie. “I know we’re not in Tokyo but seeing as we probably won’t ever make it there I thought I’d make good on my promise here on Okinawa. I wouldn’t want your Mama to miss out on your prom picture.”

For a moment, Eddie simply stares first at the kimono then at Andrew with disbelieving eyes. Then he shakes his head and starts laughing, a sound Andrew hasn’t heard in far too long. It makes Eddie’s eyes crinkle at the edges and rings through the tent, a ghost of happier times.

“You’re unbelievable!” Eddie exclaims with another shake of his head. He sits up and lifts his hand to touch the soft fabric of the kimono. “I’d completely forgotten about this.”

“Really?” Andrew asks, raising an eyebrow. “You know I’m not one to go back on my promises.”

Eddie huffs out a laugh. “But that was years ago!”

Andrew shrugs. “Still, a promise is a promise. Now, up with you, freshen up. We want to look good for your prom picture, don’t we?”

Eddie grins up at him and after a moment of disbelievingly staring at Andrew and the kimono he does as Andrew says. He tries to tame his unruly curls, shaves what little stubble has managed to grow on his face since yesterday and puts on a clean uniform while Andrew sheds his and tries to figure out how to put on the kimono.

“Need some help?” Eddie asks in quiet amusement. He watches Andrew with his head tilted and the fondness in his eyes makes Andrew’s heart melt.

“Could you tie the belt?”

“Sure,” Eddie nods. He steps closer and Andrew can feel his body heat through the thin fabric of the kimono as Eddie reaches around him to tie the belt neatly around his waist while Andrew holds the kimono closed in front of him. “There, all done.”

Eddie takes a step back and gives Andrew a once-over.

“So, how do I look?” Andrew asks, striking a pose.

Eddie bites his lip to keep from grinning. “Utterly ridiculous,” he says. A little more quietly he adds, “Still dashingly handsome, though.”

Andrew ducks his head and wills himself not to blush. It isn’t often that he or Eddie can take the time to shamelessly look at each other and it’s such a novel sensation that it makes him feel a little embarrassed.

“It’s a shame I don’t have a dress uniform here,” Eddie remarks while self-consciously picking at the hem of his green uniform that never fails to make his freckles stand out. “We’d make quite a pair, you in that blue kimono and me in my dress blues.”

Andrew takes a step closer and reaches for Eddie’s hand. “I think we make quite a pair no matter what,” he murmurs softly.

Eddie smiles at him and nods. “Can you believe that it’s only been two years since we had our pictures taken in Melbourne?”

Andrew shakes his head. “Crazy, isn’t it? So much has happened in that time.” He squeezes Eddie’s hand.

“We should go back there, someday,” Eddie suggests quietly. “Have our picture taken again.”

“We will,” Andrew promises. “But first let’s get this over with,” he says, gesturing at the kimono he’s wearing. “I’m beginning to feel uncomfortable in this thing.”

Eddie chuckles at him and smoothes out the crinkles over Andrew’s chest. “Ready when you are. Who’s going to take the picture?”

Andrew glances at his watch. “Doc Katz should be here any minute.”

“Doc Katz?” Eddie laughs. “Don’t you think the poor guy’s already put up with enough from us?”

“I thought he’d be the one least likely to look at us like we were crazy,” Andrew admits sheepishly.

Eddie gives him a look. “You’re wearing a kimono, Andy. We’ve passed crazy a long time ago.”

They grin at each other. A knock on the door of the tent makes Eddie take a step back and bring some appropriate distance between them. It doesn’t diminish his smile, however.

“Come in,” Andrew calls, finding it difficult to drag his eyes away from Eddie.

“Captain, Lieutenant,” Doc Katz says by way of greeting. “Company corpsman and photographer, at your service,” he adds with a little bow.

“We really appreciate this, Doc,” Eddie tells him with a warm, heartfelt smile.

“To be honest,” Katz admits a little sheepishly, “I couldn’t really pass up the chance to see the skipper in a kimono.” His eyes flick over to Andrew. “You make quite a sight, sir.”

Andrew puts his hands on his hips. “I sure hope so.”

Katz laughs and gestures to the door. “How about we take this outside? The light is quite nice right now.”

Andrew is a little wary about stepping out of the tent like this but to his relief no one is about. It’s one thing for Eddie and Doc Katz to see him like this and quite another if a private of King should happen to walk by. Luckily, the sun is high over Okinawa, making it almost stifling hot even though it’s not even noon yet, and most personnel keep to their tents.

“How do you want to do this?” Katz asks them, effectively stopping Andrew from nervously looking around. Andrew looks at Eddie who shrugs. Katz sighs in amusement. “How about you stand next to each other in front of the tent?”

Eddie and Andrew shuffle closer to each other. Standing straight-backed they look back at Katz who takes a picture before either of them can say anything.

“Perfect,” Katz grins. “Now, Captain, how about you look a little more … feminine? And you just keep standing like that, Hillbilly.”

Andrew does his best to look “more feminine”. He has no idea what Katz has in mind but he does his best impression of a swooning girl. It must look ridiculous because Eddie’s mouth keeps twitching and his eyes crinkle at the corners. Katz, however, seems happy with what he sees and takes another picture.

“You’re a natural, Captain,” he praises.

“I’m not sure whether I should be flattered or not, Doc,” Andrew remarks dryly.

“Definitely flattered,” Eddie murmurs next to him.

Katz refrains from commenting. Instead he says, “How about we take one more? You said you wanted a prom picture and for my prom my Ma had me and Margot standing close with our arms linked.”

“How is Margot, anyway?” Eddie asks as he steps closer to Andrew and offers him his arm.

“She’s good,” Katz tells them with a smile. “Can’t wait to have me back home again, obviously. She’s already made so many plans for us I’ll be occupied for the next five years with things to do and people to meet.”

Andrew carefully slips his arm through Eddie’s and stands close to him. For a moment, they look at each other and all Andrew can think about are the plans he has in mind for him and Eddie once they leave this war behind them.

“Smiles for the camera, please,” Katz suggests softly and he takes two pictures in quick succession. “I think we have it.”

“Thanks, Doc,” Andrew tells him.

Katz waves his gratitude away. “Glad I could help. I’ll get these to the battalion photographer and have them developed, shall I?”

“Yes, and I’ll get out of this wretched thing,” Andrew mutters, pulling at the collar that is somehow irritating his neck.

He steps back into his tent, Eddie close at his heels and feels glad that he’s no longer out in the open.

“Here, let me,” Eddie whispers softly into his ear and very gently begins to loosen the belt. His hands are warm and careful as they push the silken fabric from Andrew’s shoulders.

“Thank you,” Andrew whispers into the quiet of the tent. His breathing feels awfully loud.

“Thank you for doing this,” Eddie tells him softly. “Mama will be delighted.”

“She better be,” Andrew says, turning around and looking directly into Eddie’s eyes. “I don’t get into girls’ clothes for just anyone.”

Eddie’s smile widens. “Maybe we should get a couple of kimonos of our own,” he muses. “We could use them as bathrobes or something.”

“I don’t think so,” Andrew decides, causing Eddie to laugh. “Once is enough, believe me.”

“Alright,” Eddie grins. “Shame, though. It really suits you.”

And it does, Andrew has to admit a couple of days later when Doc Katz brings him the developed photos. It doesn’t make him look as feminine as he feared it would and instead simply emphasizes his natural body contours much to his surprise.

“I hope you don’t mind me taking a couple of pictures of you two when you weren’t posing,” Katz says sheepishly as he hands Andrew the pictures. Andrew leafs through them and just like with the pictures from Melbourne he finds himself liking those that were taken without his knowledge most.

“I don’t,” he tells Katz with a smile.

Katz looks relieved. “I think I might have discovered a new hobby,” he says, nodding at the pictures. “The battalion photographer was so kind to lend me his camera for a couple more days, so if you need any other pictures taken, don’t hesitate to ask, sir.”

“Will do,” Andrew nods and smiles at him.

“Good,” Katz says. “Then I’ll be off to see Sledge if that’s alright with you. Apparently, wearing a kimono is becoming the latest trend.”

Andrew laughs and waves him away. Looking back down at the pictures in his hands, his smile widens. He can’t wait for Eddie to see them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments and kudos, guys! It really means a lot and I'm also a little sad that this story is almost over. I still have plans for a thrid installment, however, though it's going to be a while until that's ready. But there's at least two more Andy/Eddie stories I'm going to upload this year: one is my Pacific Big Bang entry (which is even longer than this story) and another is a short Percy Jackson / Greek demigod AU that still needs a little polishing up and features other HBO War characters as well. I really hope you'll like those stories as well =)  
> Have a nice weekend and see you next week for the last chapter!


	35. Okinawa - Late September 1945

**35\. Okinawa - Late September 1945**

“There they go,” Andrew says quietly as a high whistle behind them announces the boarding of the troop ship. He doesn’t look back, no matter how much he wants to. “Not too long and they’ll be gone, and we’ll be alone.”

Eddie bumps his shoulder. “Not exactly alone,” he states softly. “There are still some boys left, like Burgin.”

“True,” Andrew agrees, “but it still feels weird, doesn’t it?” He turns to search Eddie’s face for the same kind of feelings that trouble him. He finds them in the depth of his blue eyes.

“Like something’s missing,” Eddie sighs, looking away. “We’ve been with these boys so long I’m not sure I know how to be without them anymore.”

It’s like Eddie can read Andrew’s mind. He’s been afraid of saying goodbye to his company for the last few weeks and now that the day is here and the goodbyes have been said he just feels empty, like he lost some part of himself. And he supposes he did, because ever since Cape Gloucester King has become just as much of a family to him as his mother, father and sister are, and he feels their absence keenly. There’s only one thing that makes his heart ache a little less.

“At least we still have each other, hm?” he says with a smile and a touch to Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie glances back at him, but his smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. It hasn’t for a while now whenever Andrew brings up the matter of the two of them, of the future they can finally dare to map out, and it worries Andrew.

“Until we go our separate ways,” Eddie says quietly.

Andrew wants to believe that Eddie only means the brief time when each of them goes home to their respective families until they meet again after Christmas, but there’s a sad kind of resignation underlying his tone that makes Andrew wonder what’s really going on in Eddie’s head. He’s known Eddie for years now, knows that Eddie would do anything for him, even fight a war he doesn’t have to, but he begins to doubt that Eddie knows Andrew would do the same for him. And it’s Andrew own fault, he knows, for taking so long to put Eddie first.

He remembers several moments over the last few months where Eddie hinted at his securities, just like now. The closer they come to leaving the war behind them once and for all the quieter and more melancholic Eddie gets. Andrew knows it’s because Eddie worries that once they’re back home Andrew’s going to meet a pretty girl and forget all about him. It’s ridiculous, of course, because Eddie is his everything, but here on Okinawa there’s no way for him to prove that. All he can do is be there for Eddie and reassure him while he bides his time. Once Christmas has come and gone he’s going to see Eddie again and he has no intention of leaving after that, society be damned. They’re going to move in together and get the happy ending they deserve.

They reach Andrew’s tent and settle down next to each other on one of the cots.

“You know I’ll come down to your parents’ house after Christmas, right?” Andrew says into the silence. “My whole family is excited to meet yours after all this time.”

“Mama is probably just as anxious to meet you and your family as she is to have me home again,” Eddie tells him with a small smile.

“And you also know that I will stay after that, don’t you?” Andrew continues. “I still plan on living in a big house with you and waking you up with breakfast in bed every morning.”

This time, Eddie’s smile reaches his eyes. “Can you imagine that?” he asks, sounding wistful. “Our house, our bed. No sneaking around, not having to hold back.” The corner of his mouth quirks up teasingly. “Whatever will we do with each other without people around?”

Andrew grins back at him. “I’ve got a couple of things in mind.”

“Oh, do you?” Eddie asks.

“Yes,” Andrew whispers. “Do you want to know the first thing on my list?” When Eddie nods, Andrew lowers his voice. “I’m going to kiss you breathless.”

Color rises to Eddie’s cheeks and he ducks his head, but there’s a soft smile on his lips and his eyes are closed in contentment. Andrew loves moments like this between them, where they can talk about the future and Eddie doesn’t shy away out of fear of rejection. Gently, Andrew raises his hand and lays it between Eddie’s shoulder blades, rubbing gently.

“Not long now,” he murmurs, leaning closer. “Two more weeks, give or take, and we’re finally going home. Can you believe it?”

Eddie shakes his head. “Some part of me is still expecting another battle,” he admits. “After all this time it just feels surreal that the war is really over. I haven’t been home in five years.” He opens his eyes and looks at Andrew. “Five years. God, that’s such a long time. I suppose it’s foolish to think that everything at home will be just like we remember it, isn’t it? I mean, I know it’s not, I just have to look at Jeannie to see that, but I still have this memory of home, of how that felt like from five years ago and I’m – I don’t know, I’m worried, I guess, that I’ve been gone too long, you know? That things have changed so much that it won’t be home anymore.”

There’s a desperate need for understanding in Eddie’s eyes that makes Andrew press his hand more closely to Eddie’s back. For a moment he doesn’t know what to say.

“Your home will always be your home, no matter how long you’ve been away,” he reassures. “Things may be different, even the people might not be how you remember them, but there’s one thing I know for sure: your parents love you and that is something that doesn’t change. That’s unconditional. Even if everything else feels different when you’re back your Mama’s embrace, your father’s smile – they won’t.”

Eddie looks up at him with a smile. “Thank you,” he says. “I really needed to hear that.”

Andrew smiles back at him. “Any time, Eddie. You’re not the only one who worries about being back.”

Eddie raises an eyebrow at him. “What do you worry about?”

“Having changed too much myself,” Andrew admits. “The things we’ve seen, the things we’ve done … how do you explain them?”

“You can’t,” Eddie states matter-of-factly.

“Exactly,” Andrew agrees. “That will always stand between them and us, you know? They will never understand what the war has been like for us, just as we will never know how it was for them. It’s another reason why I’m glad we’re going to live together: you know my nightmares just as I know yours.”

Eddie’s smile is sad when he says, “We’ve got our fair share of those, don’t we?” He sighs, and fiddles with the hem of his shirt. “To be honest, I don’t even know how I’ll manage those few weeks when you’re in Massachusetts.”

Andrew’s heart goes out to him and he reaches for Eddie’s hand to give it a reassuring squeeze. Eddie’s sleep problems have gotten better over the last few weeks but there are still times when something triggers him and he can’t fall asleep unless he feels Andrew’s pulse beating reassuringly beneath his hand. It’s another thing Andrew worries about when it comes to going home. Everything in him hates the fact that he will have to leave Eddie behind for a few short weeks while they each get reacquainted with their families, but there’s nothing he can do about it.

“We’ll talk over the phone every day,” Andrew reassures Eddie with a gentle squeeze. “And if things get too much, you just say the word and I’ll get in the car and drive all the way down to your parents’ house.”

This startles a laugh out of Eddie. “Even in the middle of the night?”

“Especially then,” Andrew tells him with a smile, but his voice is serious.

“You’re crazy,” Eddie tells him fondly.

Andrew shrugs. “Perhaps. But I’d do anything for you, Eddie. Anything.”

Eddie’s breathing stutters a little. “The feeling is mutual,” he whispers.

“I know,” Andy says softly.

Eddie has shown him again and again just how much he is willing to sacrifice for Andy. It still makes Andy wonder how he managed to find such an amazing person to spend the rest of his life with. Eddie was the one who got him through the worst and lowest moments these last few years, simply by being a steadfast and having Andy’s back at all times. Andy is more than willing to be there for him in return in all the years to come if Eddie will let him.

His eyes lock onto Eddie’s and he smiles. He knows the future is uncertain but as long as they stay together Andy is sure they can overcome anything life throws at them. They’ve come so far already and even though they’re a little worse for wear and both a bit broken what they have is good and what is yet to come can’t be anything more than great.

He can’t wait to start his life with Eddie. The future can’t come fast enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here it is, the final chapter of this story. I wanted to thank every single one of you who left kudos and comments over the last couple of months. I really appreciate the feedback and I'm very happy that you enjoyed the story! =)
> 
> As I've mentioned in the previous chapter notes I plan on doing a sequel about the time when Andy and Eddie finally get home. Some chapters are already written but it's going to take some time to get everything ready. 
> 
> Again, thank you guys so much and see you for the sequel or my Pacific Big Bang story! ^^

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't make any money with this story. This work is based on the HBO mini-series The Pacific and the characters portrayed therein. I mean no disrespect to the real men who fought in the PTO.


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